BEFORE: (Day-of the PPV, not part-of the PPV). Jenny Craig milking curvy little Bertinelli for all she's worth: bikini battling cougar getting all the rounds she can handle, as well as covering a lot of beach action. "I love it!" effervescent Val bubbles in prefight. "I said right from the start that I want to be active - I didn't just want to be a commentator - not with THIS body! I'm getting great looks at girls - the wins will come. Right now I'm just trying to put together good rounds, get girls hurt, and improve every time I'm out there."

Meade a pageant veteran with a lot of good rounds as Miss Ohio - she's got mixed emotions where Val's concerned. "I love that she's putting her body out there, and she's being competitive in her forties," Robin allows, "but she's just not a very good fighter, and I think maybe that hurts the image of mature fighters who still have a lot to give. My mission is to give Val a good old fashioned Ohio beat down - maybe show folks what a curvy 40 something fighter can REALLY do!"

Daytona beach outdoor bout - standard ring set up on beach volleyball court, high noon. Meade in frisky ponytail with swept bangs; cobalt blue bikini; white gloves. Val in purple monokini that looks a skimpy one-piece from the front (cut out sides) while giving a bikini look from behind; black gloves; hair up as per her purple-swimsuit Jenny Craig ad. ASIDE: Elisha Cuthbert and several other starlets actually PICKETING this bout - signs deploring women this old fighting under the sun. One placard shows a silouhetted cougar in a circle with a line through it; others saying "SAY NO TO COUGARS", and so on.

During R1: Healthy slugging exchanges, both women getting off robusto: eyes blazing, teeth bared. Meade's weight of shot decisive: time and again she'll slug Val out of her stance; we're seeing Bertinelli slap awkardly at times as a result, unable to keep her balance. Meade direct, resolute - punching from her hips with both hands in rising, tight arcs: path of the blows describes an X - Robin clipping away with palm-down wallops on Val's face, breasts.

R2: Val aggressive early - straightening out her right hand and testing the Meade jaw. Follow up rights plow into Robin's breasts, backing pageant beauty up: good first minute for Val. Meade responding with the same rising lefts and rights, simply outslugging Bertinelli toe to toe. Val forced to step away to regroup - cute face uncertain. Meade stepping-to Val with a stubby left jab, poking her way close enough to get busy with those swinging rights and lefts. Bertinelli belted round the ring: she's wobbly butt late, really starting to get moved by Meade.

R3: Val trying to pounce early: Robin checks her with a short, palm-down left hook to chin, nearly sitting Bertinelli down. Robin walking Val down after discouraging her with the hook: Meade starting to bully her girl. At one point, Val's got her right across her breasts, left across her belly, shying away as Meade's marching in from Val's left. Robin stuffing a short, plugging right in above Val's left hip on Bertinelli's retreat: Val's lips pursed, pouting; Robin's teeth bared as she drives Val before her.

R4: Val gamely engaging, wading into the teeth of Meade's swinging lefts and rights. Brutal trade sees Bertinelli break down as both girls bounce mitts off face. Val staggered, breaking down as Meade starts shellacking away one-sided: Val wobbles to all fours, leaving Meade elated. Bertinelli creaky getting up, taking deep breaths: Robin parading the ring, waving to the bleachers. Val takes a swaying 8, gathers herself: she groups hands close to her head, then drives in head-and-gloves into Meade's oncoming breasts. Good buffetting blow heavy enough to move Robin backward: Val following up pinwheeling shots to the head and chest, further disorganizing Meade. Robin backing up isn't the same girl: Val able to step-to and hook those jugs - rack-whacking Robin to ropes. Final moments see an excited Val square away and jiggly on Robin: Meade sitting butt in ropes, covering her face as Bertinelli plows the flanks like a little champ at the bell.

R5: Val bringing the fight...she blunders into that short, palm-down check hook of Robin's, Meade just jerking it to chin with a compact twitch of her left pec. Bertinelli stumbling on her heels SCOOTS TO HER BUTT! Cue waterworks as Val starts to blubber, sitting there all numb and pasted. VB beats the count shabby, bleating "YES!" when ref asks her if she wants to continue: on comes Meade. Robin steps in big, BOUNCING the right hand off Val's flank, then fitting a sumptuous hook loud to Val's paunch. Bertinelli groaning, cringing down: she puts hands on her knees, huffing and puffing, utterly defenceless. Meade loads up, swings a right hand wide to Val's buttock...Robin looking at ref, clearly unwilling to keep smoking Val here. That's it - ref waves it off - Bertinelli wheezing in pain, hands on knees as Robin lifts her mitts and struts.

After: Meade a shining beauty - stepping-to and out-slugging the always game, but generally outgunned Bertinelli. "I loved that she brought the fight to me," a gracious Meade says in postfight. "Val's got heart - I was hurting her from the get-go, but she just didn't want to quit. I like her spirit. UNLIKE that punk Carrie Prejean. My offer is still out there for that tramp, but I haven't heard boo from her people. I've said all along that I can't WAIT to put a little Ohio foot up that disappointing California patootie! Prejean's got it comin'!"