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16 November 2009 Kate Beckinsale vs Rachel McAdams

Page history last edited by Archer844 14 years, 4 months ago

 

Posted by simguy on 11/16/2009, 8:24 am

BEFORE: Both girls masters of psychological warfare: Rachel retains Jenny McCarthy as camp advisor; Kate takes on Neve. "She tends towards chunkiness," Kate observes of her foe. "Chunk never threatens perfection. My body is simply too lovely to be beaten - too efficient. Further, I've bought superior brainpower for this effort: Jenny McCarthy cannot hope to match wits with Ms. Campbell in the planning department: this fight is a foregone conclusion. I was planning on moving against Rachel this year as it was...I'm delighted to see that fate has thrown us together." Rachel non-plussed; Jenny a little extra-plussed, forcibly restrained in her seat as Mac takes podium. "Kate's heading for a fall," Rachel warns. "You can only call yourself the sexiest, most perfect person alive for so long before someone punches you to sleep. Hello: one dose of Z's coming up, bytch!" Rachel in tawdry baby blue twist tied bikini top and hipster-fit bottoms; small white gloves with navy palms; softly curled hair to the neck - curly forelocks sexy about the eyes. Kate in purple Esquire-shoot fighting bra and panties; small black work out gloves; hair loose and wild. Volatile stare down during ring instructions - Kate seconded by Neve; Rachel by Jenny: that's one nervous ref in there as all four beauties are hummin'.

During R1: Girls stand off at medium range, trying to shock each other stiff power. Hooks from Kate rake Rachel's breasts; Rachel responds in kind. Minute mark, Rachel shifts to her left, fits a stubby straight right flat to right side of Kate's jaw, buckling Beckinsale's perfect knees. Kate recovers behind her jab, stepping left to turn Rachel's right flank. Rache pressing up the middle, pounding at Kate's ribs robust right/lefts: Becks gives ground a-grunting...stymies Rachel via right uppercut/shrugging left hook to keep from being ropebound. Good crisp professional stuff - both girls having their moments: final moments see Beckinsale separate herself. Digging left hook to crotch; another; tucking left hook to Rachel's paunch as she's bunched up and gasping from low blows; dip-n'-dig left uppercut firm to sternum; final pumping left to crotch leaves Rachel spellbound. MacAdams doubled over, tummy pumping in and out as she's stooped hands-on-knees. Becks puffing hair out of her eyes, breathing hard as she struts to corner hands on hips to an avalanche of boos and strident referee's warnings.

R2: Becks jabs Rachel's face, putting her on the defensive. Stepping in, Kate's back at Rachel's trunks, jerking in the short left hook, then pushing in with body to bump MacAdams back. McCarthy screaming from ringside, bouncing on the spot: "WHAT THE HELL, REF?" Becks stalking: stiff left jab/hook to chest; HARD right cross. Rachel slumping into ropes, hands up in desperate peek-a-boo. Kate dips left, fits left hook in behind Rachel's right elbow: good sumptuous lick digs out meat-divot as Rachel cringes forward. Kate slides in close, using her shoulders to bump and jostle: left to Rachel's smarting crotch, then a quick clinch to body her upright. MacAdams in swoon, trembling in Kate's arms: Becks pushes off with a snarl, hooking Rachel's ribs, then doubling up the left into a clipping uppercut. Rachel's head flips back...she's loosened, staring, auburn curls in glassy eyes as BECKINSALE RIPS IT UP! Kate all-in - she's going jug via jagged left uppercuts and short right crosses - SHE'S POUNDING RACHEL'S PUPPIES! MacAdams swooning, lips pouting open, fists beating at her fatty-packets as she slumps numb on ropes. Steady scrounging takes it's toll...Rachel's twist tie give way; conquered boobies tumble out, and KATE'S STILL AT 'EM! Determined jug-mugging has Kate on autopilot - she's biting her lower lip, just keeping that brisk rhythm as helpless hooters flop and slap about. THE REF JUMPS IN! Rachel FINALLY hugged to safety, fouled and mugged into a heartless TKO2.

After: Bedlam in postfight. Beckinsale preening, demanding that Jennifer Garner give up custody of battered Rachel so a walk of shame can commence. Neve distancing herself from Kate, telling Rachel: "That wasn't me. I didn't sign off on that." McCarthy the first to take it physical, attempting to slug at Kate while security bodies the blonde back. Chaos, but Kate lovely throughout, taking time to pose for photographs, apparently unconcerned by the turmoil in her wake. "I'm through with a shout," she tells OK! KO! Magazine. "I'm simply too much for this level of competition."

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