Before: "I'll fight tooth and nail to deny Jenny," a serious Jessica promises in prefight. "I know she's hungry, but this is the best, most legit run of my career, and I'm not letting her take that away from me. Plus - I've never been beaten by a cougar before. Never. It's going to be a heartbreaking night for Jenny McCarthy - I'll see to that."

McCarthy wriggling in her seat - so jazzed for the title-shot you can see it. "I think chickie might have just called me a cougar," Mac quips at podium. "MISTAKE! Listen - I'm not going to bore you guys with a big technical preamble. Here's the plan: I'm going to beat the shite ouf of Jessica Alba. Sorry if that's crass or crude or whatever - but that's the whole friggin' plan. There's a title at stake fellahs - Jessica's got it - I want it. I am not going in there to play pattycakes with this woman."

Jenny in scarlet bikini - big ring connection at left hip; black gloves. Jessica in teal bikini top and stripey bottoms from Into The Blue; hair back in slick, low ponytail; white gloves. After ring instructions, Jenny touches 'em up hard and shouts, "AWRIGHT, LET'S GET YOU HURT!"

During R1: Grinnin' Jenny wings a whistling right at Alba's chin to open, missing as Jessi leans all bendy-backed out of the way. Alba rotating left, slinging a wide right hand - missing as Jenny ducks-and-pivots. Crazy fire fight abates as neither girl's productive lobbing haymakers early: by the minute mark, both are settling down, setting up behind educated jabs. Jenny stiff-stickin' - jabbing Jess to jugs and ribs, then pivoting left. Alba sinewy, grimacing at the poke, but answering back with a back-hand up-jab off the hip, ticketed for Jenny's mouth. Down the stretch, Jenny gambles - steps in with a right hand hard inside Alba's right shoulder; left hand clean across the chin. Jess sent stumbling back to ropes: she quickly sets up earmuff, crouching low. Jenny steps-to, salts away the first with a vigorous left-hand batting of Alba's sleek flank/golden brown back - just tidying up for points. "Stay off her back, Jen," Ref barks after the fact. "That's your first warning."

R2: Sluggin' Jenny wades in, eats a withering right uppercut as Alba plants on back (right) foot, walking Jenny in. MCCARTHY'S ROCKED! Jenny wanders away from the shot - face forlorn - she stumbles, nearly drops, then rights herself, reels to ropes. Alba's pupils dilating huge: she lopes in, ranging distance to Mac's chest with an extended right, then LASHING Mac that curling, limber hook! Brace of sinewy, stroking hooks slashes at Mac - taking her chin and rightside ribs with vicious spank. McCarthy sitting into ropes as her legs stiffen: she's sputtering, ready to go, but stubbornly denying Alba satisfaction. Jess shifting herself into lanky slugging position - popping her hips-right to power those hooks; bending in all supple on slinging right hands. Mac PASTED - stooped forward behind her gloves, she's battered and shellacked, trusting curvy legs to hold her up. Alba applying limber-limbed lather - nothing too frenzied - taking the time to knuckle-up on Jen's shoulders to stabilize her. Jess tilting to either side to lap at Jen's flanks - swiping in behind those elbows, winning cringe from Playmate body. Down the stretch, Jessica threatens knockdown again when she dips left shoulder, pops hips-right and hoists a rangy left uppercut deep to Jenny's sternum. Shout of pain McCarthy - she bunches up stricken - clinching desperately to keep from pitching into canvas. Bell: Alba eyes blaziing - turns on her heel and whipsaws her torso, drawing that long blonde ponytail across Jenny's punch-tender face. Mac's lips part in astonishment: it's the shock of so much softness after so much hard...and the soft hurts worse!

R2: Mac all busted up, grimacing as she steps-to: Alba feeling it, knows she put miles and miles on Jenny's odometer last round. Midring: Alba arcs in with a looping overhand right, juuuust curling it over Jenny's back as the blonde slips low. Mac back at Jess with short, digging hooks - bouncing a pair of rapid strikes off Alba's lean ribs: blonde bobbing with the hooks, staying low, moving her head. Alba snarling, bracing long legs wide: she's committed to slugging - wanting to get Jenny gone. Right uppercut misses; left uppercut misses: Alba curling 'em supple - Jenny weaving side to side - leaning in with extended left elbow to nudge Jess off balance. Alba dippin' n' rippin' lanky uppercuts - mitts collected at her chin in ready position when she resets: Jenny weaving, bobbing, leaning back, then bending forward - always inching herself forward, pressurizing Jess - countering her short, ringing licks to ribcage. Midway through, Alba steps back, looking to walk Jenny onto the right uppercut: Jenny gambles, punches-with and drops a drifting right cross onto Jessi's chin as Alba's uppercut sails. ALBA GOES DOWN! Huge, shattering whack draws a shout from the crowd: Jessica dropping as though poleaxed - crashing to her back all arms outstretched, legs stiff. IT'S OVER! Jessica just switched OFF by the winner and NEW bantamweight queen - Jenny McCarthy!

AFTER: Jenny's brazen facade cracks - she's crying real tears into her hands in the aftermath, bawling in triumph as Jessica's brought gently around in the background; slowly positioned in a seated position with her head forward. Mac ALL banged up - fielding some of the best leather Jessica could summon in that withering second round beatdown - but Jenny just wouldn't be denied tonight. "This is so huge...I...WE...we've worked so hard to get to this moment, and then deliver..." a pause as Jenny collects herself. "Right - the fight. I mean - she hurt me. I didn't think she could, but I got careless and she rocked my Effing world, then put the straps to me. I don't know how I got through the second round - I was winking in and out, and I was actually thinking 'don't quit - make the ref stop it' - you know? But whatever - the guy let it go - Jess punched herself out - and then it was my turn. We knew she loves the uppercuts, you know? I worked hard on timing that punch in the gym - figured it might come down to my right cross against her right uppercut, and, well...it did!" Camera pan at ringside shows a seething Kate Beckinsale all arms crossed and baleful glares; a beaming, clapping Evangeline Lilly; a thoughtful Holly Valance, and; many other bantam hopefuls looking to pounce a rookie champion.

Posted by Sceej Boxing on 2/20/2009, 10:19 am, in reply to "Jenny McCarthy vs Jessica Alba title bout"