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23 January 2010 Amanda Bynes vs Zoe Saldana

Page history last edited by Archer844 14 years, 3 months ago

Boxing After Dark

 

 

 

 

Posted by simguy on 1/23/2010, 9:08 am

 

 

BEFORE: Bynes, the self proclaimed "Bantam Stacy Keibler" not shy in prefight. Recently let go by Decesare's training camp, Amanda's got this to say: "We were rolling in jiu-jitsu practice and I thought it would be fun to trap Carmella in some triangles. She kept tapping and tapping and she got really mad, so she wanted to do some hard boxing. Well: I was enjoying her on the ropes and they whistle me off, and the next thing you know I was fired. So - whatever: I guess Carmella doesn't like to be challenged in her own gym. (Account subsequently challenged by an HMK press release, to wit: "Amanda was dismissed from Carmella's camp because we felt she was no longer competitive with Ms. Decesare. If sparring girls aren't going to push our fighters hard, we can't keep them on - simple as that.") On Nina Dobrev's recent destruction of Lindsay Lohan, Amanda says: "I have no respect for Nina trying to pad her record with Lohan. I'm fighting prime Zoe because I want to be a real player: anybody could polish up Lindsay these days - Nina's all hot air." And finally, on Zoe herself: "She's pretty, but I hit harder, and I'm a little prettier. I think she's going to be shocked, I really do!" Tremendous pressure on Saldana's sleek shoulders: with Trek and Avatar combined, she's the biggest movie star in the world currently fighting. "My trainers have challenged me to win a championship this year," Zoe admits in prefight. "That means I have to ANNIHILATE Bynes-level comp - I can't let her hang around. She's cute and spunky, and I love her fighting spirit...but I have to take all that away from her if I'm going to live up to expectations." Zoe in black bra, racy leopard print bikini bottoms; black gloves; hair in Star Trek ponytail. Bubble-gum pink push up bra for Bynes; white cloth bottoms; white gloves; long blonde hair straight, soft.

During R1: Zoe bobbing loose-kneed in her stance, sliding back to create gaps, left hand dangling, right near her chest as she susses Amanda out early. Bynes hopping-to, hands at her sides - she'll lick hooks or right hands off her thighs, twisting into succulent sweep-action blows. Zoe weaving underneath, pivoting around - she's letting Amanda commit, then stitching in sudden, darting right hand leads face and body. Lean-away hooks off Zoe's right (back) leg graze Amanda's mouth, spooking her: Zoe showing supple form early. Good pressure from Bynes throughout - she's eager for contact: Zoe slipping the worst of it - often emerging off Amanda's flank to slink in behind her, trailing a hand across quivering ingenue tummy. Zoe in control, not doing a lot of damage, but visibly frustrating Amanda: Bynes scowling, stomping to her corner all vexed and huffy.

R2: Similar supple weaving and twisting: both girls bendy-backed wonders in the ring. Amanda routinely curling limber punches over and across Zoe's back as Saldana dips low/sidesteps: blonde girl changes tack, lifting lanky uppercuts to Zoe's taut brown midriff. Good spank: Zoe rebuked...Amanda leaning chin out over Zoe's shoulder, lapping both mitts underneath to good effect. Zoe hopping right along perimeter, turning Amanda's left flank: Bynes tracking, shifting, hands low. Amanda lifts right uppercut off her thigh, punching Zoe's tummy, then tries to double that right hand to chin: Zoe quick with the pre-emptive receipt chopping righty to chin and dropping Bynes to young buns in a heartbeat. Amanda stunned, gobsmacked, sitting up pretty as Zoe strides past all sleek. Wobbly 8, Amanda: Zoe quickly jabbing her into ropes, punching mouth and tummy in quick succession: Saldana's eyes narrowed with ferocity. Sharp right cross penetrates Amanda's widely spaced mitts, punching her face aside (eyebrows high; eyes closed; lips parted); Zoe shifts weight to back (right) leg, twisting to pull a succulent hook across Amanda's chin, toggling it. Amanda out on her feet - face in confused stupor...she jacknifes forward, nosing in at Zoe's feet, deep asleep. KO2 in near perfect fashion - Zoe Saldana.

After: Saldana rounding into form - lithe footwork and supple power neatly solving Amanda well within the distance...just like they drew it up. "We knew Amanda was whippy, but sloppy with her punches, and usually wide open for counters," A fresh, largely untouched Zoe says in postfight. "She's trying to fight like Carmella, but I'm not so sure that's a good idea for Bynes. I found it easy to get to her, easy to hurt her...and look what happened."

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