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23 July 2010 Elisha Cuthbert vs Evangeline Lilly

Page history last edited by Archer844 13 years, 7 months ago

 

 

Posted by simguy on 7/23/2010, 9:41 am

 

BEFORE: "You know, Elisha Cuthbert's one of the few active fighters to have ruined another girl with her fists," Lilly comments in prefight, referencing the destruction of once-feared Jolene Blalock, "so her punching is definitely her strength. She's not the smartest fighter ever to strap on a bikini, so I'll probably do a little trap-boxing on her - frustrate her, dampen her spirits some - then go hard on her. It'll be intense early - 'Lishy's very hard to contain when she's fresh...but as the fight wears on, I'll impose my will and break her." Lishy's cutting weight early, coming in hard: weight between fights always an issue for the succulent canuck. "Some people think I fight better chubby," Lishy contends at podium, "but I don't want Lilly leaving me behind if this thing goes rounds - so I'm comin' in tight-and-tasty! You know - I'm catching Vange at the perfect time: she thinks she's invulnerable, but she took a terrible beating from Jaime Pressly, and I have to think she's still a little hinky from it. Damn right I'll press her early: if I can get Lilly out of there, that's definitely the way to go!" Elisha in navy bikini; small white gloves; shoulder length hair. Lilly in neon green sport bikini with dark green splatter pattern; hair in messy beach bun with bangs framing face.

During R1: Like-minded Canadians meet midring, plant, pitch. Withering side to side fire braces Lilly across the face early: she forms crossed arm, bending forward at waist. 'Lishy bouncing palm-down wallop off pate and shoulders - blonde girl stepping her brunette back early. Cuthbert able to step-in her hook to midsection, winning grunts from Lilly: Evangeline absorbing terrific body-shock early, proving her conditioning. Cuthbert enjoying Lilly on ropes through second minute - force-feeding former champ rugged little right uppercuts as Lilly's stooped forward. All for naught as down the stretch - sizzling exchange of crisp hooks and crosses sees Cuthbert smote 3 times in quick succession about her face/jawlines and BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Cuthbert panting on all fours... Lilly erases a round of fine Cuthbert pressure to post a thumping 10-8 late.

R2: Girls wade in...Lilly greeting Cuthbert with muscular left uppercut, picking blonde up out of her stance and sitting her on her butt! Cuthbert thrashing about, scrambling to her feet: tears brimming as blonde falls farther behind early. Middle minute a savage punching whirlwind...Lilly boring in on Cuthbert, driving her ropeside...bobbing on the spot while unleashing non-stop lefts and rights. Cuthbert ragdoll, but competing her little heart out: time and again she'll get smote into ropes and bounce back slugging - trying to hurt Lilly with every punch. Crisp Evangeline right hand turns Elisha's head aside as Cuthy's loading up righty: BLONDE GIRL DOWN as 'Lishy stumbles to all fours again. Final minute - Lilly pressing the attack - rotating her shoulders to roll hup-hup left/rights against Cuthbert's tummy. 'Lishy grimacing, backing up, but bouncing off ropes to come back firing...she connects on a swinging right to Lilly's forehead, stunning the brunette! Crisp trade in left uppercuts/right crosses and LILLY GOES DOWN! Evangeline shunted to her rump as Elisha beats her to punches: Cuthbert looming over top Lilly, seething down at her as ref moves in.

R3: Lilly brawny about 'Lishy's flanks - bouncing a series of lefts and rights off ribcage. Cuthbert proving sturdy, stands in the pocket, answers back the stubby right uppercut/left uppercut - pausing to load weight on left (front) leg, then RAMMING left hook to liver! Lilly gasping, stooping forward: she crosses arms against suddenly aching gut as Cuthbert goes insane! 'Lishy's face twisted in Lilly-hate - Cuthbert stroking and stroking right hands across Lilly's taut brown back - blonde girl punching with such ferocity her back (right) foot's skidding up off canvas! LILLY TAKES A KNEE! Evangeline groaning, smote about her kidneys...ref bodies Elisha back for the frowning of a lifetime as Cuthbert agitates to continue. Rickety 8 Evangeline Lilly: she covers up in hurtin' peek-a-boo as Cuthbert bounces back on in: Romping blonde clean up sees effervescent 'Lishy pour leather in sheets across Lilly's head and shoulders. BOOMING HOOK, EVANGELINE LILLY! Lilly wilting, seemingly overwhelmed...she erupts out of the cross-arm crouch with as single thunderbolt left hook - turning Elisha's chin hard to port and SITTING CUTHBERT DOWN! Elisha astonished, propped up on elbows, blinking up all open-mouthed at smouldering Lilly. Bell sounds: no one hears it for the crowd noise.

R4: Lilly leans in, carving a palm-down right across Lilly's torso (left pec to right hip). Lilly digs hook-to-liver, lips pressed tight as she shoves it in short. Cuthbert back with a little chop-chop left/right hammer-drop sequence to Lilly's jugs, then both girls detonate hooks off offending chins. They circle clockwise, then dive in: Lishy over the top with a right hand, missing; Lilly bobbing low, then digging right hands hard to Lishy's ribcage, one, two, three. Lishy grunts on receipt - swipes a tight hook across Lilly's temple, buckling 'Vangie's knees...Lilly backs away to regroup...Elisha steps-with and DRIVES HOME RIGHTY! Gorgeous, gambling right hand catches Lilly flush, swivelling her head even as she's pulling back. Lilly's hands drop - face immediately going blank, legs locking up as SHE SPLASHES TO HER BACK! Evangeline Lilly hitting canvas like a cadaver - hands flapping up over her head - eyes closed, lips parted in shock...Cuthbert squealing, stomping around in the vicinity - wastes valuable seconds as ref bodies her back. Evangeline twitching herself awake...rolling over her right side...she gets to her knees...rises...pitches face first into ropes...pulls herself up. Evangeline swaying in the wind, eyes rolling, head lolling and REF WAVES IT OFF! Lilly blurting in protest as ref doesn't like what he sees: TKO4 Elisha freaking Cuthbert!

After: Elisha in hysterics - leaping into arms of her trainer and bawling in triumph: arguably the biggest win of her career finally sees her overcome an elite fighter. Lilly rickety, unstable: heartbreaking night sees her yield the upset, going 0-2 in her last two fights for the first time in living memory. "I broke her to the body," Elisha bleats proudly in postfight. "I took her out to the chin, but I'd hurt her early with a digging liver shot that basically had her ready to go. I wish that had been Rachel MacAdams tonight, 'cause that's how I want to pay her back for her treachery - but this is SO sweet! I stopped Evangeline Lilly - broke her and stopped her. I'm FINALLY the hottest fighter in boxing!"

 

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