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24 Dec 2008 (Santa-Kini Bout) Kaley Cuoco vs Mary Elizabeth Winstead

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 1 month ago

 

Kaley Cuoco 07.jpgMary Elizabeth Winstead 02.jpg

 

 

Posted by simguy on 12/24/2008, 7:37 am


Before: "I want to make a statement on Mary," Kaley chirps in prefight. "To me, this is an easy fight - I'm putting that kind of pressure on myself to broom Winstead out of that ring, because she shouldn't be thinking of herself on my level. I want to start 2009 the way I started 2008 - as the hottest fighter in boxing. Mary's a good place to start!" Winstead excited, upbeat: she's a top 10 ranked girl, and looking to claw her way higher over Kaley's stiffened body if necessary. "I know how explosive Kaley is, and what a great athlete she is," Mary allows at the podium. "But I think I can throw a blanket over this girl and give her a beating. Kaley took it tough from Jessica, and I don't know that Cuoco's all the way back from that. I'll test her early, and if I see give, I'm gonna push!" Girls in identical santa-kini two piece numbers: scoop-front scarlet tops trimmed in white fur about decolletage; snug scarlet boycut trunks with black belt; black boxing boots to mid-calf with white fur trim; black gloves with white fur cuffs. NOTE: Kaley bopping to the ring to Bittersweet's "The Bomb" - the group nice enough to remix the line "read...my...lips" as "be...my...bytch" for Kaley's entrance.

During R1: Kaley loping to her right, feinting, then pivoting left - giving Mary looks. Winny not buying: dukes up, chin tucked - she chops her way in with overhand rights/rising lefts, hooking Kaley's ribs as blonde backpedals. Ropes: Winstead applying scrabbling pressure - clawing punches across Kaley's front; batting hooks off flanks; batting sidearm rights off shoulder. Cuoco's lips pursed as she bobs and rolls - leaning back into ropes, then crouching low, putting a shoulder into Mary's stomach to bump her off. Kaley sharpshooting counter-uppercuts and swiping hooks, but getting steadily gnawed on: Mary willing to absorb clout in order to maintain top position on ropes and get work done. Bell: Mary rings a batting left/right off Kaley's waist late - ref barking warnings as Cuoco re-engages in anger.

R2: Kaley up on her toes, dancing the ring, hands tracing little circles in the air as she motors. Mary walking Kaley down, looking to bring battle with bright-eyed intensity. Batting licks to flanks drive Kaley to ropes again: she shows peekaboo guard with dukes at temples, weight forward. Winny drives in, swinging freely to flanks: Kaley quick-clips the left uppercut while leaning back into ropes, clouting Mary's chin. Winny shocked - stops punching: Kaley erupts off ropes with another quick-clipping left uppercut, followed by brace of hooks - every punch finding Mary's chin - Kaley hopping on left foot, getting off rapido. Winstead sputtering to her left - she's punched into ropes as Cuoco circles out, reversing field. Cuoco turns predator - eyes hard - pawing jabs at Winny's guard as Mary stoops forward behind mitts. Pesky-tapping jabs touch at Mary's mitts, then RIPPING right uppercut splits 'em, punching Winny's head up and back - mouthpiece fluttering skyward. More pawing jabs into Mary's guard; brutal right hand buried deep to abs - blonde leaning in close, tucking the punch home. Kaley in close, bumps off with right shoulder - eases to right (back) foot to pull the left hook across - hesitates - picks Mary up another right uppercut off the right foot. Winstead badly braced here - ripped and clouted: Kaley baring her teeth, shifting weight from one foot to the other, getting supple leverage from hips and springy legs. MEW beaten without mercy - refusing to clinch or otherwise impede her pummelling. Bell: Kaley steps back, scowling in wonder that Winstead's still upright.

R3: Mary attacks! Savagely beaten last round, MEW grimly steps-to, looping overhand rights, then hopping in short lefts. Kaley dipping, rolling, trying to slip this stuff: she's cuffed and buffetted, forced to withdraw. Goes like that - battered Mary stalking forward in aggressive crouches, winging power punches and looking to get on top of Kaley: Cuoco trying to finesse Mary, slip-and-counter her, but generally unable to do so.

R4,5,6: Kaley's corner urging: "reduce her" during break: Cuoco changes tack accordingly. Cuoco driving in, engaging Mary - often reaching under Winstead's arms to initiate writhing, swiping exchanges in close. Kaley compact, supple, strong: she's pushing Winny around, making her feel strength. Winstead slugging furiously, but occasionally unproductively: wider punches wrapping around Kaley's broad shoulders as blonde crowds close. Cuoco savagely single-minded - beating the body on Mary - digging at MEW's ribcage - chopping at her biceps. Grim, grinding campaign of attrition launched by Kaley: blonde fighting off brunette's chest, backing her up, being rough and strong with her, hacking at Mary's vigor. Winstead huffing and puffing, fighting every inch of the way, but Kaley's also slick inside, dipping and rolling her shoulders to blunt Winstead's brawling attack. Each round sees Mary panting at the bell, eyes furious, but dimming. Nine grinding minutes has Mary mouth breathing, shopworn, unable to come forward with the aggression she showed previously. Kaley VERY hard hearted and focused here, showing a baseliner's patience and consistency through 6.

R7: Unusual psychological gambit employed by Kaley: she pushes inside and gets snug with Mary as before - but attack now directed almost soley to jug. Cuoco proving a magnificent short-shrugging jug-mugger - brawny arms held in tight - short, scuffing, cuffing, pumping strokes beating opposing santa-top senseless. Winstead mute with punishment - slapping back at Kaley's flanks - steam really going out of Winny's punches as she's taken to ropes and soundly worked over to breasts. Bell: Kaley pushes up off smoldering brunette all rosey-cheeked and satisfied: Mary's eyes glistening with how-could-you expression as Kaley takes the rivalry into uncharted waters.

R8: Spirited resistance from increasingly shabby Mary: Kaley takes the round off, allowing brunette to step forward. Winny dutiful - swinging sidearm rights to Kaley's flank; dipping in on front (left) leg to scour ribs and breasts via rigid left uppercuts. Cuoco able to leg out, circle-round: blonde legs giving her command of ring as Mary's weary body and wheels no longer keep pace. Kaley curling in just to vex Mary, touch her and coax her forward: Winstead using up the last of her reserves in responding to these baiting attacks. Winstead's round - she does all the work - but Kaley much fresher at the bell, lively eyes looking over threadbare brunette.

R9: Winstead shaky, but willing herself forward - Kaley easily lopes out of range, seeing what Mary's got left. Winstead pursuing, mouth open, eyes bleary: she's a rocked beauty, bravely pushing the fight as Kaley circles. Mary's misses degrade her form - Kaley eventually pounces with a lead right receipt, stamping Mary's face. Cuoco jumps to her right - hooking Mary's left eye in transit: Kaley starting to put 'em together rapid and nasty here. Mary shows earmuff, stooping forward hurt: Kaley leans in on front (left) foot, picks up Mary's tits a pair of short-shrugging left uppercuts before double-clutching and digging a short left hook to liver. Mary groans in receipt, cringing: Kaley tips right in her stance, lashes a cruel buggywhip right hand off her foe's left hip. Mary baby-stepping forward, crippled in her middle: Kaley again leans forward onto left leg, short-shrugging in a pair of left uppercuts to tits, then mopping up that gorgeous left hook to liver. MARY GOES DOWN! Winstead sobbing aloud - slow-sinking to all fours: she's gasping-hurt, squeezing out tears. Kaley grinning, strutting hands-high, justifiably proud of some sumptuous body work done on Mary. Winstead up swaying at 10: ref checks her at ropes, waves it off - she's finished. TKO9 Kaley Cuoco.

After: Winstead showing typical bravery and determination, but it's Mary Denied tonight: she breaks down into heartbroken tears in the ref's arms, protesting the stoppage. Cuoco strutting past to look things over, but not extending her customary post-fight greetings: Kaley coldly dismissing Winstead, refusing to acknowledge any part of brunette's plucky performance. "I did what I wanted with her," Kaley explains in postfight. "She came out rambunctious early, wanting to scrap: I hung back, let her spend up some money, then took it to her. I'm not mean: the thing is - there was a lot of talk about Mary matching up well with me, and I felt that was so wrong. I'm way stronger than her inside, and I proved it. When I was picking her up in her tits, she was all 'UHH! UHH!' you know? She was hatin' it in there from me, let me tell you!" Winstead angered by Kaley's conduct: in days to come, Mary tells Celebrity Ring: "If Kaley wanted to be enemies - mission accomplished. I wanted to keep fighting - it was the ref who stopped the fight: Kaley better remember that. Nothing she did convinced me that she's so special."

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