By simguy 2-25-06

"She's a little starstruck, poor thing!" Charlize taunts in prefight, inflicting the full weight of her world-girding celebrity upon her opponent. "But that's to be expected. When the best blonde you've seen has been Trish Helfer, you're not exactly prepared for a Charlize Theron - but opportunity's knocking and I give Alana credit for answering the door. I'm frankly disgusted at the way Helfer, Ryan, Landry, Bell and even that cheap tart Diaz priced themselves out of this fight. Only De La Garza really wanted to rumble, God bless 'er!"

Alana looking a little overawed at the sheer size of the press gallery and international interest in the fight - but this is what she got in the fight game for. "This is the biggest fight of my career in terms of exposure and money," Alana admits. "I've had some thrilling encounters with Tricia Helfer though, and I have to disagree with my opponent on one thing: I think my rivalry with Helfer HAS prepared me to fight, and beat, a Charlize Theron. I think Charlize is much more hittable than Tricia, and although you always hear about the Theron chin, I'll be very interested to see if she can take MY punch."

Theron in cream bikini; Alana in dark charcoal bikini (from Las Vegas ep), wet hair. White gloves, both vixens.

Rd 1: Alana cautious, chin tucked, dukes up, elbows in, peering out over her gloves through long dark lashes. Charlize much more relaxed - right at her chest, left at her hip as she schmoozes to right or left on flat feet, supple legs. CT standing in one spot and just weaving her torso side to side, turning her shoulders - she's looking to anchor herself in the pocket, slip De La Garza's work and ticket right hands to brunette chin. Midway through, blonde absorbing batting right hands in her flank: CT rolls to her right with a De La G right, answers back a slicing right onna chops and ALANA GOES WOBBLY BUTT! ADLG stepping in fence post holes - face stricken: Charlize steps in strong, muscles a lanky hook tight behind the ear to club her girl sideways to ropes. Charlize majestic as she strides in, treats herself to a thumping right/left on trembling Latina tummy, but Alana won't be mopped-up on. De la Garza baring her teeth, comes CHURNING off the ropes, beating back offending blonde belly with a reckless surge of pumping lefts and rights - Theron forced back under heavy fire, actually clinching at midring, brow knit in a frown of complaint as De La Garza wards off early catastrophe.

Rd 2: Charlize stalking, playful - left hand tracing lazy circles in the air, then darting backhand jabs or cuffing hooks. Theron supple on flat feet - sliding to spots, standing strong and weaving her torso - she's willing to give up Alana's wide right hand in the flank in order to dial in counter-rights of her own up the middle. Second minute, Theron stuns Alana again - another right hand off a cute shoulder roll that catches De La Garza's chin - Alana stamping away distraught, covering up earmuff. Theron sailing in, bending to heave a sweeping right hand wide n' loud to waist: bombastic blast sinks De La Garza to ropes with a groan as Charlize breaks into a happy grin. Theron on to finish...but ALANA WON'T HAVE IT! De La Garza desperately shook, but resilient, once again denies Theron with a FURIOUS bombardment of blonde ribs and waist. Chugging assault backing CT up - she's reaching for Alana's head, pulling her in cheek to cheek: DE LA GARZA'S SCRUBBING PUPPIES! Alana being held behind her neck, but pumping short, repeat right hands into Theron's jumping jugs - blonde gasping in outrage as she's backed to the ropes and mauled.

Rd 3: Alana turns stalker - loosening up now: hearing Charlize whimper has boosted brunette morale. De La G forward behind a reaching jab, leaning into hot right hands up top, then slinging evil mop-up hooks into Charlize' tanned midriff. Theron on her heels, often gloves at temples as she blocks headshots, but OH, the body Alana's getting. De La Garza twisting her body, caressing her hook against Charlize' ribs and tummy - succulent, taut, spank being generated as Theron's legs tremble with the damage. Final minute, Alana cleaning up on Charlize at the ropes - brunette just set strong, working heavily to the body, then arching her back to carve uppercuts. Theron face-in-gloves, leaning forward and back into the ropes under heavy shutout shellack in the third.

Rd 4: Charlize soaks up Alana's best, roars right back. Theron with that mesmerizing left hand tracing circles, beguiling and distracting, then coming with vicious, shearing right hands. Midway through, Charlize ducks low off the ropes, pivoting to her right as Alana overswings on her hook, sending herself face-first into ropes just vacated by blonde. Theron emerging from behind, leans into a go-home right hand as Alana's turning herself around: POUNDING face blast rocks Alana's head back - she absorbs the shot, staggers forward open mouthed, bleak-eyed. Charlize opening up - big licking hook off her hip clouts Alana across the mouth - lunging right hand scorches across the cheek, swivelling Alana's head and DE LA GARZA GOES DOWN! Raucous, limber left/right puts Alana flat on her back - brunette momentarily swooning out, then drifting back in - she rolls gingerly to her right hip to fight off the 10 count. Deep breaths Alana on the ropes, long lashes fluttering and HERE COMES CHARLIZE! No gallantry from De La Garza this time: she covers up earmuff, doubles herself over and digs in to receive a furious lather from the KO-minded Golden Goddess. Charlize tight lipped, hard-eyed: she's digging at Alana's right flank with repeat hooks; she's hoisting right hands up into Alana's left flank. Theron looming over top, often riding one hand gently behind Alana's head while plundering away the other mitt. Bell: Theron nostrils flaring, chests up to force eye contact: Alana swooning, but defiant, snivelling back her tears.

Rd 5: ALANA BRAWLS BACK! Right hands chase Charlize ropeside; body work folds her up hurt. Alana pressing up with her left shoulder, right hand and left forearm smearing CT upright - then brunette putting snappy licks together on golden torso. De La Garza swiping buckets of jug in tight - smudging her hook across, following through with plenty of forearm. Alana warned for throwing her elbow on tight hooks as she works Charlize over - Theron face-in-gloves, bending at the waist, rotating her torso, just trying to ride out the storm. Bell to bell Alana - succulent body thump handed out. Brunette shows brass as SHE chests up at the bell, getting nose to nose as she forces blistering eye contact - enraged Theron pushes Alana off to usher in an anxious ref.

Rd 6: Alana gets to Charlize with body shots - thick, strapping beauties - lefts and rights - withering to the waist line. CT groaning, cramped up: hair across her eyes, mouth open - she's stooped forward, slowly going to crossed-arm to protect her weeping ribs, throbbing tummy. Alana fighting brilliantly in retreat, stepping back in good order, widening her hook to get in behind CT's elbow; swabbing savagely across the lower back; getting right uppercuts off the right foot, left uppies off the left as CT staggers forward. CHARLIZE GOES DOWN! Theron finally spilling to all fours, face-first to the ropes - De La Garza lifting her mitts and screaming in exultation as crowd roars to it's feet. Wonky 8 CT - eyelashes batting - she staggers off the ropes, then gets tucked back in by a series of three HOISTING right hands up into breadbasket. POOR CHARLIZE! Theron sobbing aloud, horribly gutshot - brunette just heaving away righty, riding her left arm across CT's upperback and treating herself to Oscar-winning midriff. THERON'S DOWN AGAIN! Charlize drooping breathless to all fours, sitting back on her haunches, hugging herself as tears push down either cheek. De La Garza takes one look, leaps away shrieking "SHE'S QUITTING!" and it's enough to goad Theron off her haunches. Shakey blonde manages to climb ropes to stave off the stoppage, wounded eyes silently accusing Alana and DE LA GARZA MARCHES IN! TORRID two way - Theron's turn to be brave while hurt - she turns back Alana in the fight's most savage exchange. Blistering, rising lefts and rights from both beauties - mitts kissing off tummies, ribs, tits and chins. De La Garza steadily beaten back to midring, getting rocked - SHE clinches to tie up as trembling Theron accepts the rest break.

R7: Both girls breaking down under punishment: hands are lower, mouths are open, eyes are sleepier. Both land right hands, but Alana's the worse for wear - turning away and executing a hurting ponytrot on stiffening legs. Theron crowding, bodying her girl sideways to ropes - Charlize turns welterweight goon as she slops-on rugged, holding and hitting and mauling her foe while bogging Alana down. De La Garza grimacing - wrestling against Charlize' limbs, trying to wedge in uppercuts to fight the big blonde off: Theron maintains position, muscling in punches from point-blank range.

R8: Hurting beauties slouch to midring: flat footed stances, pawing jabs. Alana leaning into pounding right hands to Charlize' chest off the jab, stepping blonde back, moving her around - Theron sullen, trying to time her own right hand to Alana's chin as girls trade haymakers. Midway through, girls jab each other simultaneously to mouths, both lean into right hands and ALANA WINS THE RACE! De LA Garza catching ALL of Charlize' chin, ducking down and in on follow through: CT's right hand sails harmless over Alana's back, glorious blonde legs corkscrewing and THERON SPRAWLS TO HER BACK! Charlize desperately, desperately hurt - lying there like she's been tossed out of a speeding limo - chest shuddering as she weeps groggily, trying to rally. Alana lifting her mitts, strutting, then slowly lowering her hands in astonishment as CHARLIZE BEATS THE COUNT! Theron willing herself off the canvas, sitting into the ropes and waving Alana grimly on in after 8. Deep breath De La Garza: she wades in, palming Charlize' shoulders to brace her, then unleashing a withering, hamhanded barrage of strapping lefts and rights. Every inch of tummy meat, ribcage, and rack is pounded senseless on Theron - she barking in shock at the abuse; Alana snarling as she pours her heart and soul into the finishing run. BELL: Charlize swaying on the spot, ruined, but standing; Alana sobbing for breath, SO disappointed to see Charlize defying the KO-call. Ref steps in as exhausted brunette topples accidentally into swooning blonde - both girls just mute with punishment.

R9: Oh, they slop away! Both beauties exhausted, battered, faces puffy and worn as they fall in together to wrestle and slug. Mouth on shoulder, weary brawling - girls just palming one another's hips back, lifting in thick rights and lefts to throbbing ribs and tummies. Charlize the brawnier - she's mostly walking Alana around, pressing her into ropes for ref's breaks, making brunette take weight. Theron often disengaging with a ruff forearm across the face, or a pushing hand in the forehead - just little irritants designed to help CT win a close, rugged round. De La Garza competitive, but constantly coming off second best - really pushed around and bullied in a murky ninth.

Rd 10: Alana starts strong, trudging into Charlize with walking lefts and rights off the hips: blonde covers up, rides it out, starts answering back at the minute mark. Theron nice n' compact - she's very relaxed in the pocket, just dipping and weaving her torso enough to make Alana miss, then lifting heaving right hands into her foe's dusky breadbasket. De La Garza frowning, lips parting: heavy Theron body blows have brunette sagging. Theron easing herself back, letting Alana droop forward: CT getting carving right uppercuts off the right foot, left uppies off the left as she walks Alana into lanky, licking punishment. De La Garza's mouthpiece flutters off her gums - she's a weary beauty, just stumbling forward, trying to tie up, but getting picked up uppercuts. CT sidesteps near the ropes and ALANA FALLS DOWN! De La Garza stumbling to all fours, absolutely destitute - she reaches into the ropes, eyes staring glassily into the crowd and ALANA CAN'T GET OFF HER KNEES! De La Garza blubbering, up on her knees, hands in the ropes, but unable to climb - her body finally succumbs to the punishment, handing Theron a KO10.

After: Charlize punchy, wobbling slightly as she staggers into Jessica Lange's arms for a relieved hugging session: brunette darkhorse took blonde Goddess into deep water tonight. Alana's power punching had her firmly in the lead after 8 raucous heats - greatness of Charlize never clearer as she simply refuses to lose tonight.

"I dug down tonight," an exhausted, battered Theron says in postfight. "I just couldn't let her get over on me, you know? When she dropped me, I could hear in her voice how thrilled she was, and that really spurred me on. I just decided that no way, no how, was I going to lose to this girl. She's strong, she's good - but now she knows what it takes to be a GREAT fighter in this sport."