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27 September 2019 Avril Lavigne vs Camila Mendes

Page history last edited by caspian2 4 years, 2 months ago

Posted by Lookout! Boxing on Sep 29, 2019 at 4:20pm

Avril Lavigne
(35, 5’1½, 126 lbs, 31:12 FCBA, The Dollhouse)
Vs.
Camila Mendes
(25, 5’2, 110 lbs, 10:7 FCBA, Odds & Ends)

Results: Lookout!; Story: Caspian & The Dollhouse

BEFORE:
Back in July of 2018, Avril Lavigne suffered one of the first losses of her burgeoning career with a seventh round knockout at the hands of Camila Mendes. And from the look of things tonight, Avril is in a celebratory mood, sitting with a crown atop her head as if celebrating a special occasion. But for those who can read the Canadian blonde beyond the surface level, it is quite clear Lavigne still hasn’t quite gotten the taste of her previous defeat at the hands of Camila Mendes out of her mouth, even after all these months.

"It’s my birthday bitches!!! 27th of September! I’m 35 today, can you believe?! I feel 25 at most!” the Canadian singer giggles as she plays with a strand of hair on her right shoulder. “I’ll be celebrating tonight with some sweet ass revenge on this b*tch Mendes here!” Avril tilts her head staring at Camila Mendes from across the room with a huge b*tch-face.

“I mean…She’s SO f*cking overrated,” she continues. “b*tch acts tough but if you look closer at her lame 10-7 record, you'll find that she’s lost FIVE of her last seven fights!” Avril breaking down her opponent’s statistics with a loud snort. “Now look at MY record - it’s WAYYYY better than hers and that’s why didn’t deserve that title shot, like, AT ALL. That's why she f*cking LOST! And she didn't deserve her lucky win agasint me last year either...which is why I'm here to kick her ass and set the record straight. And by the way - your lame ass boobs aren’t impressing anyone, Mendes. Who the hell let you fight for the JMD title anyway?! Pfft. I'm the one who should be getting title shots! And I’ll prove it tonight on my freaking birthday! Cheers bitches!"

Avril ends her monologue with a sip from the beer bottle sitting right next to her on the table. It’s your usual Avril-tirade, but this time, a bit more festive. And with the knowledge that Camila does come in with a 1-0 record over her, there’s a lot more on the line for Avril than for her opponent, especially on her own Birthday! Camila, of course, is aware of all of this, which explains her curled lips as she listens to Avril’s remarks from the other end of the table. The Odds and Ends starlet is looking pristine, in the prime of her life, wearing a white tank top, her dark raven hair tied upwards into a battle bun.

“If my poor, “lame” record is that bad, what does it say about little old, and I mean…OLD…desperate Avril, who went the f*ck down to my fists after just seven rounds last year?” Camila teases the blonde, lifting her fists above the table to face height and sending a sly smile in the blonde’s direction. “I mean, you guys remember, don’t you? I thought I had already proven a point when I laid her out that evening. She literally ended up sleeping in Kristanna’s (Loken) arms. But here she is again, running that big mouth of hers and just begging for another ass-kicking. I guess you’re a masochist Av? or maybe I didn't make it painful enough the first time...Who the hell knows?” The brunette shrugs.

“I actually had no idea its your birthday today Av, but I’m actually SO glad.” Camila giggles. “I get to make this your WORST birthday ever. That’s f*cking awesome if you ask me. And as for ‘believing it’, we DEFINITELY believe you’re 35 Av, we have eyes, you know. You still have that annoying teenager face, but that body….” Camila shakes her head. “That needs a LOT of work.”

Lavigne fuming from the other side of the table, red faced Dollhouse Queen looking furious as ever, scowling at Camila. “Shut the hell up you fugly b*tch! I’m still 10 times hotter than you.”

Camila completely ignores Avril’s protests as she continues. “I was expecting you to b*tch about wanting a rematch way earlier, but when that didn’t happen, I figured you were just…..understandably….. scared! I guess now you think I'm having some kind of an off year? Hoping to get lucky? Hmm..Well, ask and you shall receive b*tch!...But I AM getting my 2 minutes of un-interrupted playtime when I’m done with you.” Camila sneers. “Ready to feel THESE babies up close?” Mendes sticks out her chest, her supple breasts looking exquisite through her tank top, with plenty of cleavage on display, garnering a bunch of cheers and whistles from the back of the crowded press room as the brunette promises to make good use of them tonight in preparation for her JMD title fight if she manages to beat the Canadian again.

No staredown at the podium as that would be absolutely a bad f*cking idea, we think. The ring officials agree, herding both ladies back to their respective locker rooms after the press conference wraps itself up on its own - no need to let the two girls get their hands on each other this early, especially when there’ll be plenty of time to do so later in the ring. Avril already trying to rush repeatedly at Mendes, standing up from her seat at the table and shouting a string of explosive expletives in response to her comments.

Later in the arena, Mendes first to emerge, sporting a black sports bra, still showing plenty of cleavage, with a pair of black and blue boxing tights that accentuates the rest of her impressive toned figure. She puts on black gloves as she makes ready to do battle in her corner, tying her hair up in a tight ponytail to the backdrop of loud, blasting pop-rock music. Avril’s stately entrance is next, the Queen arriving at the scene to the tune of her song “Here’s to Never Growing Up” blasting through the arena. The 35 year old Blonde is accompanied by Loken and Electra on both sides, her traditional entourage in tow. The singer is wearing her now trademark crown and a white semi transparent robe that covers her body from shoulders to toe, with her usual fight attire of black and pink sports bra and tights underneath, her blonde hair in a high ponytail as per usual.

But wait! What is this!? Following behind the usual Dollhouse entourage are 4 staff members carrying a huge pink and white BIRTHDAY CAKE! My god! Who allowed this?! This is a boxing match!

Avril giggling and grinning broadly as she struts along the aisle, high-fiving and waving at her many fans while the arena explodes with huge “AV-RIL! AV-RIL!” chants.

Lavigne finally makes her way into the ring, completely ignoring Camila on in the other corner of the ring as she walks to her own corner and unrobes to some loud cheers from her fans. Avril begins stretching for a minute or two while her huge birthday cake is being put on a special table right beside the ring.

One epic rematch in the making between these two lovely ladies, and as per the stipulation demanded by Camila Mendes herself and agreed upon by both ladies, this fight will allow the winner 2 full minutes of uninterrupted ‘victory celebration’ with the loser alone in the ring.

We can’t wait to get things started here! This will be a wild one! Referee signals for the match to begin with a wave of his hand, and HERE we go with ten rounds of Flyweight action!

ROUND 1:
This match is a must-win for dear Avril, both in terms of the mental game and in a sense, sheer practicality. She needs to get herself over the hurdle of one of her first tastes of defeat since making her famous comeback to the ring 2 years ago, and a win over Mendes tonight would certainly cement her rightful place in the top rankings of the Flyweight division. As a result, Lavigne’s fans expressing some shock and surprise when she barely moves out of her half of the ring, carefully taking this fight slow and steady, and shooting test-jabs at Camila’s guard, trying to avoid an all-out escalation of the war. Mendes herself looking partially surprised, already been briefed on Avril’s mad-house tendencies, doesn’t know what to do when Avril instead chooses to circle about her in hovering pattern, firing shots at her from afar. The two girls do trade some lucky punches to the face, but otherwise, both of them showing more restraint than normal, looking hesitant to get down and dirty, at least this early in the fight. At the sound of the bell, whaddaya know? Avril taking the round by a small margin, showing the entire arena that she too can win without being taken for crazy.

ROUND 2:
That all changes in the second round, however, when Camila gets tired of this little make-belief session, CHARGES straight towards Avril, making up for lost time with a bevy of punches hurtling into the singer’s arms and body. Lavigne might not be willing to play reckless with fire, but what’s stopping her opponent from doing the same? Not much, unfortunately. The Doll forced to scoot backwards, trying to keep Mendes away from her with long jabbing right hands, but Camila wants to utilise her power and send Avril down to the canvas, this time in decisive fashion. The Odds and Ends starlet continues to rush her foe, scoring with another side-hook to the body before trying her luck with a hard hook crashing in up top into the arms. Avril blocking and running, manages to deflect most of the damage, even score some of her own counter-jabs to Camila’s chin but otherwise is left feeling like her entire strategy is falling to tatters if Mendes keeps this aggression up. One thing’s for sure: Mendes takes the lead back this round in a battle that’s sure to be long and drawn out.

ROUND 3:
Camila must be a pretty intimidating opponent judging by how hesitant Avril seems to be at at the start of the 3rd. The blonde deciding to keep with her strategy of fighting fire from afar, stays at a distance in the opening minute and merely twitches whenever Camila shows any inkling of charging forward in her direction. Mendes smirking as she toys with her foe like this, still supremely confident about her chances of winning a second time tonight with multiple false starts in Avril’s direction, only to shake her fists in the Doll’s direction, in direct mockery for taking her bait. Lavigne growing more and more frustrated, but powerless to punish Mendes unless she wants to wade in and do battle in the trenches. Avril however does get the last laugh when Mendes tries to pull one more feint on her, the brunette barreling in with a hook aimed at the Doll’s side but then pulling back at the last moment. Rather than jump out of the way, Avril decides to stand her ground and counter-swing, landing a deft right hand to Camila’s cheek, timing it just right as she shoves the actress’ head to the side! OUCH! Camila shocked to her core, standing there blinking rapidly for a few moments before immediately covering up and retreating. Avril punishes her some more for being cocky, chasing her with jabs all the way till the end of the round, thereby taking it for herself by a small margin.

ROUND 4:
Camila rattled by that last round, last minute rally, not looking as confident as before as she covers up her head and tries another advance towards Avril. The Odds and Ends starlet still playing the aggressor, and it works for the most part - she uses a combination of tenacity and stubbornness to slowly advance upon whatever position Avril’s in, trapping her in her own bubble with a flood of punches and excellent footwork. Avril getting more and more panicky as her opponent’s jabs and hard crosses begin to herd her into an area she has no intention of staying in - the Doll absorbs punches to the arms for the most part, but then lets out a grunt as Camila sends one or two tummy-tucking straight hands into her midsection. Avril scoring back later on, no doubt, but finding the noose tightening around her neck bit by bit. Avril fires a left-right combo into Camila’s face in the final minute, but Mendes shrugs it off and roars forward, hard swipe across the singer’s tummy sends her groaning and taking a few steps back. Luckily for Avril, the round ends soon after, but she should seriously contend whether sticking to her defensive strategy will benefit her in the long run.

ROUND 5:
Case in point: Camila picking up just where she left off, first half of the ring covered in the span of three steps as Mendes almost runs towards Avril at a sprint, knowing that Lavigne ain’t gonna meet her half-way. At least not this time. Avril grunting, wincing, Mendes landing jabs and hooks into the arms, body and occasional chest with more and more frequency. There’s just no way Avril can survive another five rounds if this kind of massacre continues. Lavigne doing some soul-searching in the final minute, suddenly DUCKS under one of Mendes’ right hooks, opts to carry forward and wrap up with her hated rival, mouth on shoulder, gloves encircling the actress’ back and waistline. It’s not going to win her any points, but at least she’s stopping Mendes from running away with the medal. Mendes having trouble getting out of the clinch, resorts to shoving Lavigne roughly into the ropes, where the two girls twist and turn some more, gloves dug into each other’s bodies on both sides of the fence. Three minutes are soon up and the referee has to step in to separate them at the bell.

ROUND 6:
That fifth round more or less gave Avril the breather she needed - she starts the sixth looking slightly more energetic, whereas Mendes is by contrast breathing hard in her corner. This here’s the cue for Avril to strike! A reversal of fortunes as Camila is the one who’s forced to throw up her arms in defence, when Avril barrels in with jabs and flurries. Avril throwing caution to the wind as she steps to the left, slams punches into Mendes’ arms, then steps again to the right, poking at her taut body, further stunning her. Still, she’d better be on the lookout for Mendes’ patented power right hook, which has been known to appear outta nowhere for some unlucky girls. Avril however too focused on pushing her head backwards that she doesn’t realise Camila’s winding up the haymaker, Camila trying to time it perfectly so that the Doll doesn’t suspect a thing - SWOOSH - Camila lets it fly just as Avril lands another right hand to her chin, BUT MISSES! Call it luck or skill on Avril’s part - the Doll looks a little surprised as the right glove of her opponent spins across mere inches from her nose. Avril recovering fast, however, bashes her right hand into the lips as Mendes forced to retreat backwards. She still stays alive long enough for the bell to ring loudly, drawing this round to a close. Avril drawing a line in the sand for her opponent not to cross, shouting Mendes quite clearly from the other end of the ring, “This is my turf, b*tch!”

ROUND 7:
Like an opportunistic ferret, one thing Avril has going for herself is a sound strategy that she takes into every fight. She might not have the fastest feet or the most powerful swing, but BOY can this woman get into your head and fry some omelettes. Don’t tell us - she was playing possum the entire first half of this fight, simply waiting for Camila to run out of breath before springing her trap? It sure looks that way, with Lavigne back to circling and landing blows all over Camila’s frame, the sheer number snagging her chin and cheek, making Mendes cry out in frustration as she reels backwards in the first minute, no amount of defensive arms or air-tight guard able to protect her from this mass onslaught. A last, wild hook from Camila only stings the air in front of Avril’s face, and before anyone knows it, Avril’s stepping in with a clear uppercut that lands right on Mendes’ chin, knocking her head skywards! UGHHHG! Camila Mendes not knowing what hit her, goes stumbling backwards with her eyes squeezed shut, hands and legs groggy in the air, until she COLLAPSES down onto her butt!

It’s the first KNOCKDOWN of the evening and it goes to Ms Lavigne! Avril too tired after all her scheming machinations, lets her lips break into a smile as she stumbles back to corner to await the inevitable. Camila still alive, however, looking dizzy and dazed as she tries repeatedly to get off her butt, let alone get onto her feet in order to beat the count. That slobberknocker to the chin must have surely done its job, as the referee hits the count of 10 and Ms Mendes is still left groaning hard on her knees, hands working uselessly to attempt to pull herself up, to no avail. Referee waves his hands int he air and declares this fight as OVER!

Official Decision: Avril Lavigne defeats Camila Mendes via KO7!

Wow! A shocking ending to this one as the usually perseverant Camila is unable to make it back to her feet after being knocked down just once, despite controlling and some would even say dominating large portions of this fight. Avril of course jubilant in her corner, jumping up and down with hands raised, beaming. Even Lavigne herself did not expect Camila to stay down it seems, but the Birthday blonde is accepting this wonderful surprise with a “Yeeeaahhh bitchesss!!!” shout out to her fans. But then, not even allowing herself a moment to catch her breath, Avril immediately signaling her team to proceed with the post-fight plan - bringing her beautiful birthday cake into the ring.

The referee signals Avril her two minutes are starting NOW and evacuates the ring, leaving the blonde alone with Mendes. Queen Lavigne quickly removes her gloves and rushes towards the fallen brunette, setting up the stage for what’s next by peppering the poor girl with kicks and stomps as Camila grunts and groans doing her best to defend herself in her weakened state. Apparently satisfied with the amount of stomps delivered, Lavigne then walks back to her corner, grabbing her birthday cake from the hands of Carmen Electra herself. “Wait, I want some!” she declares, forcing a sighing Electra to quickly cut a piece of the cake, handing it to Avril. Smiling wide, the Canadian stuffs the cake into her mouth with one quick motion, taking a big, messy bite as the entertained crowd cheers her on, before throwing what didn’t fit in her mouth on the mat for someone else to clean.

Avril still busy happily chewing her delicious cake, follows this by taking the entire cake from Carmen’s hands, slowly walking with it towards the middle of the ring where Camila is still recovering.

The noise levels in the arena reach a new climax as the fans realize what is perhaps about to happen…with Avril smiling wickedly as she struts towards Camila with the cake in her hands.
Camila’s eyes suddenly open wide in horror as she looks up, realizing Avril is standing right above her with a big cake in hand. WTF? But it’s already too late. “HAPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYY BIRTHDAY!!!” Avril shouts, laughing and giggling as she FLIPS the entire cake ONTO CAMILA MENDES’ HEAD!!! MY GOD! This arena is going WILD! Nonstop camera flashes all around as Camila Mendes’s shocked face, head and shoulders are now covered in pink and white cake goo. The brunette seemingly cannot believe what just happened, paralyzed in shock as Avril continues gloating, laughing hysterically.

“You f*cking cow!!!” Camila mouth can be seen muttering underneath the layers of pink and white covering her face, as she begins cleaning herself up, wiping the cake from her face and giving Avril the most furious stare ever.

But Lavigne has no intentions of sticking around and letting Camila retaliate. The blonde quickly dashes towards the safety of her own corner with a shriek, demanding the officials restrain Mendes and get her out of “her” ring.

Camila absolutely livid, wanting a piece of Avril, probably never imagining this humiliating scenario in her wildest dreams. But the refs are doing as they were asked, stepping in between the two, keeping Mendes away from the blonde before escorting (well, forcing…) her out of the ring. With the ring being cleared and finally safe, Avril struts to the center where her hand is lifted in victory by the ref, finally officially declaring her the winner of this grudge fight.

Mendes can only watch from outside the ring, being comforted by her own team, surely contemplating her future revenge on the cocky blonde brat, but tonight, she is forced to swallow her pride after she herself demanded this post-fight stipulation, with the Canadian blonde making full use of it, now celebrating a VERY HAPPY birthday in the ring, posing and laughing with the fans as her song “Here’s to Never Growing Up’ plays once again throughout the arena.

Happy 35th birthday Avril Lavigne!