Posted by simguy on 4/3/2009, 7:59 pm

Before: "When I look at Elisha nowadays, I don't see the up-and-coming hottie from 'Girl Next Door'," Jen smiles. "I see the shopworn hack who's taken beating after beating from the bigger girls her various managers have sacrificed her to. I don't see her championships and big wins over Eliza Dushku: I see her coming up short against Neve, Rachel, Dani...and shortening her career in the process. Bottom line: I'm fresher. I'll stop this chick early. Don't get me wrong - I expect her to be competitive at the start - but I'm just too sharp and complete for her, curve for curve." Cuthbert champing at the bit, showing no signs of intimidation despite Hewitt's fearsome postfight rep. "So much for what JEN sees," Cuthbert scoffs in rebuttal. "I see targets when I look at her: big, honking, targets that are going to get her in serious trouble. She shouldn't even be in the same ring with me: I'm smoking hot, while she's what? A two? A three with good light and a towel around her hips? Come on! Girls like that don't get it done against girls like me." Elisha in midnight blue bikini; small white gloves. Jen in vivid purple bikini; dark curls soft and loose; small black gloves.

During R1: Elisha swinging hard, kissing rights and lefts off Jen's prepared defences. Hewitt weaving side to side, standing in the pocket: she's answering-off-the-block, fitting straight, jolting punches in between Elisha's looping haymakers. Brisk, tense exchanges with girls getting off about as hard as they can: each buffeted off stance at times, forced to cover up/regroup. Final minute, Jen breaks the stalemate. First: sharp one-two preempts an Elisha right: Cuthbert's punch sails as knees corkscrew - auguring her into canvas! Crowd roaring to it's feet: Jen gazing down, batting mitts together as she strides past panicked blonde sexpot. Cuthbert up, but wobbly butt: Hewitt quickly upon E at the ropes, POUNDING THOSE JUGS! Cuthbert dazed - hair across her eyes, lips parted as Jen jams away crisscross, straight left/rights. Blonde jugs bunching up under the rack-jacking of a lifetime: Hewitt just hup-hup-hupping - back straight; lips pursed; eyes squinting; buttocks ringing as she hustles in the hurt. Bell: Hewitt banks a little insurance, prompting a squeal of outrage from shellshocked Cuthbert. Ref pulls Jen away by her elbow; scolds her.

R2: Hewitt: eyes narrowed, lips stern - she's stalking Elisha, locating her with stiff jabs to face. Cuthbert being knocked upon, staring into poke: Hewitt able to step into good spots, then trigger that short, jolting right cross, turning Elisha's head aside. Banging blasts loosen up E's knees, forcing her into shaky crossed-arm crouches: Jen immediately swinging heavy left/rights in behind Cuthbert's elbows when she stoops forward so. Thick n' methodical: Jennifer's jugs sloshing about when her fist meets beefy resistance in Elisha's flank - Hewitt really getting her hips into these thumping body blows. Elisha glum - struggling forward in crossed-arm, soaking it up to the ribcage: she's effectively crippled, unable to punch back. Glorious, hamhanded stuff to the body: Hewitt unable to get back into blonde rack, but more than happy to soften E up tummy and flanks. Down the stretch, it's too much: cranky Cuthbert stumbles forward, then wilts to all fours, panting in gutshot agony. Hewitt shakes curls off her shoulders, prancing to her corner at the bell with 2 knockdowns in 2 rounds.

R3: Elisha hurting, but enraged: blonde bares her teeth, unleashes wide, heavy swings to temporarily chase Jennifer away. Hewitt showing good mobility - on her toes as she scoots out of range all jugs a-jumpin', then walking purposefully to her right, turning Elisha's left flank. Hewitt jabs penetrate to jug and face - spanking Cuthbert onto the defensive: Elisha crouching forward in crossed arm, grimly trying to edge forward. By the midway point, Jen's back in command: knocking her jab or measuring straight rights off Elisha's hairline; hooking Elisha shivering whacks behind right elbow; belting Elisha vicious right roundhouses in behind left elbow. Elisha grimacing, inching forward: chest is covered up, but her forward leaning head is available for crisply-curled Hewitt uppercuts - Jen bouncing either hand off Elisha's forehead. Hewitt showing the ability to punch off either foot, and stepping back in good order to walk Elisha in. Big, banging third goes in the bank for Jen as she's hammering out victory one minute at a time over her blonde.

R4: Midring, girls exchanging: Elisha straightening out her shots, trading compact rights and shorter hooks - she beats Jen to punches and JEN GOES DOWN! Hewitt eating a succession of swift rights and lefts hard off her face: sputtering knockdown puts her on all fours to a hoot of glee from Elisha. Jen up at 8, serviceable - but Cuthbert quickly upon her, looking to pile on. ELISHA WANTS JUG! OH the thudding hup-hup! Cuthbert baring her teeth, arching her back and getting up into that majestic Love-Hewitt rack with both hands. Jennifer gurgling in shock, slumping into ropes as her legs give way: she's tasting Elisha in her full glory now. Cuthbert just a little banger in there - working the jugs with rising punches; lathering the waist with wide punches; dipping n' digging to either side, getting behind those elbows. Blonde not shying away from body contact: she'll reach in, body Jen back to ropes and throw her a shoulder-to-mouth just for kicks - it's raucous shove-n'-slug at it's gaudy best. Jen steadily breaking down - she's mouthbreathing, shabby, trying to tie up behind Cuthbert's elbows, but blonde won't have it. Non-stop, clubbing abuse beats at Jennifer, harvesting her jug when it's available, bashing at all else when it's not and down the stretch...SHE TAKES A KNEE! Hewitt stunned, hair in her eyes as she blinks back tears: she's kneeling at the ropes in swoon, cringing as Elisha makes to smite her righty - forcing ref to move in quick.

R5: Midring - girls flat footed, crouching, rotating gently clockwise. They paw jabs, then try for heavy right hands. They lead hooks, then look to double up with the left uppercut in close. Fighters start at medium distance, but lean in close - both girls dipping inside before getting off snug. Minute mark, Jen bounces a tart one-two off Elisha's guard; Cuthbert dips that left shoulder, answers back a hook before Hewitt's hook can land and JENNIFER'S DOWN! Jen punched to her glutes, sitting up all astonished after recoiling from blonde thunder. Elisha pounding her chest, hooting down "JACKPOT, BABY!" in the current parlance of the L.A. gyms. Wobbly 8, Jen Hewitt, but she rallies nicely. First: steady pocket defence at the ropes sees her dip and roll, countering effectively to Elisha's midsection, steadily discouraging blonde finishing run. Then, when Elisha's breathing hard - Jen reaches in under Elisha's arms, chests her back to midring, but stays half-clinched with the left arm around E's back. Jen working thick-n'-cheap - plugging right hands into Elisha's tummy. Cuthbert grimacing, squirms to join in - threading her left arm under Jen's right and around her back. Girls work at each other - stuffing right hands in above hips or up into bellies - each pushing and steering with the left shoulder; each grunting upon meaty receipt. Hewitt surprises here, walking Elisha around a bit, getting the better of stuffing trade to come back strong from the knockdown.

R6: Groggy vixens shopworn, looking distressed, but determined. Brutal exchange of thumping body blows leaves Jen destitute: she stops punching, face agonized as she tilts forward, trying to smother Cuthbert's attack. 'Lish bumping with that left shoulder, hooking Jen's paunch, hoisting righty up under left breast - blonde stepping back in good order, just walking brunette into thunder and HEWITT GOES DOWN! Jen gasping, easing herself to all fours: panting Elisha steps back, hands on hips, breathing hard, then bellowing in triumph. Shabby 8, Jen: she retreats to ropes, digs in all shoulders hunched, dukes up. Cuthbert walks in, hooking Jen a triplet of thudding lefts shoulder and head, then working in earnest to rack and tummy. Blonde lowering her head, twisting side to side to bring the harm: brunette sponging, but proving resolute; Jen fitting Elisha for accurate left uppercuts/choppy right hands off the ropes. Down the stretch, Hewitt's stubborn pocket defence has whittled Elisha down: both girls lean in with mouths open moist on opposing shoulders, shrugging and tucking tired punches into pain-wracked paunches and throbbing jugs. Bell: girls just on autopilot, still digging - ref pulls Elisha off, and her face is vacant with exhaustion. Jen slumped on ropes, hugging her body and cringing...fight's taking a terrible toll through 6.

R7: Ramshackle beauties slouch to midring: girls in aching crouches, each showing crossed-arm look to protect creaking ribs. Edging in with left shoulders, fighters go mindless - each just seeking to bump-n'-slug at close quarters. Cuffing left hooks astound either rack - the girls' every instinct directing them to establish early to jug. Tummies pumped, ribs hacked - it's merciless attrition, mouth on shoulder. Stumbling gait as the girls lean into each other for balance - curvy/stocky legs stamping, tired buttocks jostling as fighters dig in, trying to deny each other forward progress. Overall it's Elisha: she's mining quit in Jennifer's torso, getting the better of grinding trade.

R8: Hewitt stiffens - lining Elisha up on blonde approach, preempting her with that stubby, straight right cross to chin. Blonde absorbing with a sigh, then falling in hurt: Jen able to tie up, walk her girl around, make Cuthbert move her feet. Jen to the body and tits with roaming left hands - just a short-shrug dig, or cuffing swat as she hooks from off either foot. Jen rotating counterclockwise - often while pushing against Elisha: brunette freeing herself up just enough to pour a steady diet of short right hands to Cuthbert, turning blonde head aside. Elisha badly deteriorated: she's taking the potshots and body blows with curvy-legged determination, but she's a stumbling wreck by the bell. Hewitt with cheek: as she passes Elisha's left shoulder en route to corner - Jen reaches her left hand back, clapping a chunk of slumping blonde buttock with the open palm.

R9: Elisha pushing forward: young blonde finding reserves, punching a bit more vigorously - rejuvenated attack deeply discouraging to exhausted brunette. Jen's eyes haunted as Cuthbert pumps dutifully to midsection, backing Hewitt up, then walking her down. Jen flat footed - attempting to walk to the right, but forced to cover up as Elisha rediscovers her stubby jab. Cuthbert stepping in her poke, closing, banging the body; Elisha in a strong rhythm, taking the fight to Jen, beating her all around the ring. Jen eventually forced to ropes, whereupon she clinches immediately: she's spent, looking half asleep on Elisha's shoulder as blonde pushes impatiently for the break. Ref easing Elisha back, but she's feeling it: Cuthbert back atop Jen with clubbing blows, then shouldering in close to stuff, dig, plow, and cuff at her. Final minute, poor Jen just sobbing, pawing at her blonde in feeble clinch attempts: agonized brunette wilts to all fours under senseless blonde pummeling. Cuthbert staggering back on her heels, hair in her eyes - she manages a sobbing bellow at the sight of used up Jen.

R10: Midring, girls bumping and slugging in close, trading hooks to rack and tummy. Right hand Jen, creasing in over Elisha's left shoulder: blonde chin-checked, does a little stutter step, reaches to clinch. Jen hooks tummy, slides back half a step, walks Elisha's jugs into a harsh, cuffing left: Jen pivots right, dragging her left foot in a bucket as E stumbles forward. Another right hand from an angle off Elisha's left shoulder catches her upside the head: legs give a shimmy, eyes go bleak as she's momentarily wobbly butt. Hook to the face swats Elisha's head back, short right hand as Jen hops in close...BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Cuthbert punched to her back: she swims on the spot a moment, whining with eyes frowned shut, feet pushing and squeaking against canvas. Cuthbert manages to roll herself over, get to her knees, stand...she pitches face first into ropes, hanging off them for dear life, but she's up. Deep breath Jenny Love: she plods forward, dukes at her waist. Jennifer strides in, carrying a right hand deep to Elisha's belly: blonde shouts in pain, lurches forward while sitting hurt in ropes. Jen reaches under blonde arms, chesting Elisha upright: BEATDOWN! Hewitt willing exhausted arms to punch: lefts and rights swing up and across, pasting Cuthbert's staring face. Elisha just facing into it, lips parted, eyelashing fluttering - she slumps deadweight against ropes, hands at her sides. JEN GOES JUG! Brunette bares her teeth, plowing into offending blonde rack: rising rights and lefts thick, tired, but heavy, push into defenceless jugmeat. E upright, but whining in incoherently, ashen faced as Jennifer claims ownership. Blonde's head tilts back, baring her throat - she's sobbing, unable to answer and THE REF JUMPS IN! It's over - TKO10 Jennifer Love Hewitt in come from behind fashion.

AFTER: Chaos...ring filling with media and the usual suspects. Hewitt staggering away, hugging her battered body - she breaks down into sniveling tears, just releasing tension. Daisy-fresh Lacey Chabert scampers to Elisha at the ropes, quickly setting about untying and removing blonde gloves. Poor Cuthbert out on her feet, swooning, but dimly aware: she's bargaining, whispering pleading negotiations as she's unable to resist Chabert in any way. Lacey gets the mitts off, pats her right hand against Elisha's tummy and says: "This is happening - suck it up. Where's your pride?"

Hewitt wandering around hands on hips, face a puffy mess, hair all bedraggled and damp: she sees Lacey waving her over - Chabert's left hand with a firm grip on Elisha's right upper arm.

Wincing, Jen moves in - Cuthbert blurting out sobs as Hewitt approaches. Brunette reaches for her blonde as Lacey gives Elisha a gentle push forward - but both E and J are wobbly-butt/unstable. Cuthbert's legs give way, spilling her backward, taking Jen with her. 'Lish sits down with back upright against ropes adjacent to a neutral corner; Jen on her knees, pushing damp hair out of her eyes, bracing herself with hands on Elisha's shoulders. Moment's fumbling as whining blonde pushes against brunette tummy - gets a forearm up into the jugs to keep Jen off: job of work for Hewitt to pull and wrestle Elisha's feeble defences out of the way. Eventually, Hewitt snuggles in: left arm strong behind Elisha's head; left hand cupping brunette right bicep; right hand fisting in defeated blonde hair. Hewitt's battered face just glaring out into the audience: she's almost out herself, grimly putting jug to the woman who did the damage. Poor 'Lishy! Cuthbert's hands push at Jen's rounded thighs, then cup at her hips, far too weak to prevent this. After a time - Jen just leaning forward on her knees; cinching her grip; licking puffy, parched lips - Elisha goes out. Back of Cuthbert's hands drop to canvas as she sits in jug-shock, taking it big time from two of the best.

Jen straightens, her left arm still holding Elisha's head in the crook of the elbow. Brunette looking down, lips parted, then she starts working little right hands in on sleeping E's face. Short, girly poundings - Jen in stupor, mindlessly going at her conquered foe with tepid little right hands. Lacey laughing at Jen's groggy hate - reaching down, pulling Jen away by her punching arm before officials can act. Staggering Hewitt led away by giggling Chabert: there will be fines - count on it.