Maxim Lightweight Championship Tournament:

Rd. 1

Originally posted by Simguy on 6/5/2006, 6:14 pm

Jones in red bikini, twist tied connections jug and hip

Judd in baby blue bikini, twist tied connection jug and hip

WHERE FOUGHT: NYC

QUOTE: “I’ve a message for Ashley Judd,” Catherine confided in prefight. “Look to your belly. That’s all I’m going to say,”

SYNOPSIS: Much of the fighting in all three tournaments had to this point been fought on the outside: this fight would be waged art close-quarters—shoulder to shoulder, cheek to cheek as Catherine Zeta Jones committed to fighting on Ashley Judd’s turf in remembrance of an ancient body-grievance between the two.

You could have fit the girls into a locker to fight this thing—zipped them up in a sleeping bag together—put them in  sauna built for two, Rubbing tousles as they alternated head position, reaching I under one another’s rounded arms, staggering around heavy-bottomed  in twist-tied trunks as pushed one another—clean punching would prove a luxury as most scoring blows were of the tickling, plugging, or swatting variety, Judd was the heavier-handed, concentrating almost exclusively on the Zeta Jones jug, rib, waistline and biceps, getting off with clubbing twos and three with good shoulder rotation inside, Jones was the more artful with her feet, leaning in to burden Ashley while stepping around her, turning Judd and making her reorganize. Jones’ arsenal was more varied: she’d work the body, then pick up Judd’s chin up a little clipping uppercut—putting Ashley wobbly butt in fourth with just such a punch. Bumping and slugging in the trenches, Catherine dipped low with routine negligence, but to her credit, Judd quickly sought working-woman’s justice, bumping Jones’ trunks to let her know bullying would not go unpunished. In the end, it was Jones’ craftswomanship hat made the difference: Ashley had been out of the ring too long—her instincts dulled by inactivity. While Jones was scheming, working, moving and initiating—Judd would allow herself to lay in and wallow, confident that her strength would wear the plush Briton down.

It almost happened late. Punishing Catherine against the ropes—shoulder-bumping and propping her with the left elbow to set up cudgeling hooks and short, hacking right hands—Judd finally had Zeta Jones slumped and ready to go. Only desperation clinch—something Jones had done all night to good effect—saved the black-haired vixen from a possible knockdown. In the tenth, Judd would resume her dominant position on top of Jones at the ropes, punishing the CZJ breasts and midriff with brutal, kneading work—but Jones hung on to see the cards, 6 rounds to 4, CZJ: as hardfought a in for Catherine as you will find in her record.

BEST MOMENT, JUDD: 9^th round late. With Jones open-mouthed and wilting against the ropes—Ashley crowded in with the left shoulder/extended left elbow, using her stocky legs to push Catherine into the cables and keep her smothered. Easing out to get room, Judd snapped off shortarm hooks to Catherine’s forehead and jaw—punching and

Pushing with fight-winning authority, Exhausted, puffy, and swooning—a groggy Catherine Zeta Jones tied her up—her hand behind Ashley’s head, her left around Judd’s right elbow—and hung on to the bell.

BEST MOMENT, CATHERINE: 4^th round late. Forming a sluggers arch with Judd as both beauties leaned in, Catherine had systematically lapped at Ashley’s guts and ribs, even as Judd had treated herself to Jones’ own midsection. Easing back a smidge—Jones found she could get Judd to overextend forward, creating an opening for the left uppercut off the right foot. Clipping the punch in the dying moments of a hard-fought round, Jones took the points as Judd went momentarily wobbly butt, frowning in sudden shock, and unable to immediately answer. Catherine stepped forward to back Ashley up strong, and quickly went right/left to her trunks at the bell, drawing a wince-and-cringe from her foe as Catherine cuddled her close to smother any reprisal.