Posted by Simguy on 5/6/2006, 12;39 am.

Before: Lilly in a mini slump--defends herself at the podium. “I’m struggling a little, but don’t forget--I’m still a very young fighter--I know I’ve got a lot to learn, 3 or 4 losses at bantamweight is like 1 loss in any other division: there are more world-class girls fighting between 110 and 120 than anywhere else. You have to expect rough patches and jst eep your composure through them. I know Alba’ s another tough match up for me, but I’m not counting in her to collapse like so many others do: I’m prepared to outwork Jessica for 10 rounds if I have to. I’ll just consistently be the better woman all night long.” Alba preening at the podium--Jessica with another title bout in hand, can afford to treat Lilly as a tune up, albeit a dangerous one, for Jaime Pressly. “I don’t like to toot my own horn,” says the infamous horn-tooter, “but I feel like I’m the perfect fighting machine at this weight. it’s all coming together for me and THIS summer--this summer will be the Summer of Jessica Alba. I’ll battle Lilly like the forgettable little tramp she is, advance to jaime and take her titles. Then all summer long I’ll defend and turn back every cheap slut in the division!” Jessica in lemon yellow bikini, blonde hair, blonde hair in low ponytail, Lilly in lime green bikini with dark green patterning, slick battle-braid hair.

During R1: Lilly bobbing and weaving like a maniac, crouching low, dipping side to side--Alba swatting at air early as she tries to make slapping contact from wide stance. Evangeline stubby-jabbing, then quickly covering up, making her moves, scooting in on Alba--quick right/left on chin startles Jessica, sends her jumping back wizardly ot of range. Jessica on her bicycle, hopping--even shamelessly jogging away from Lilly at times--Evangeline scuttling, keeping hands up, moving her head--scooting-to, and getting off with very short, crisp combinations. Alba refusing to engage, minimizes Lilly’s effect, but Evangeline the clear aggressor--Jessica basically reduced to flopping out a backhand jab as she’s wheeling away.

R2: More up-tempoing pursuit from Lilly: face set in stone, expressionless as she hurtles forward, crouches, attacks with vigor. Alba hounded to the ropes, leaning back into the strands with hands up, palms out, just looking to ease back from Lilly’s scouring work. Evangeline clawing her hook up top--doubling it up--she clips Alba’s chin, startling the taller vixen and LIGHRS JESSI UP THE RIGHT HAND! Savage, pounding blast crashes past Jessica’s mitts, swivels her head and ALBA’S CAPSIZED! Jessica all limp n’ pretty, swooning forward with hands low to either side eyebrows high, eyes closed, lips parted “wha’ hoppen” stupor. Lilly biting her lower lip as she hops in, shifts hips, clips a clean hook to chin, chops another right hand--poor Alba taking on her drowsy face, torso tilting. More punches--vigorous, smashing lefts and rights--Alba’s head tossing to-and-fro and JESSICA GIOES DOWN! Jessi hitting on right side, rolling to her back parallel to ropes and it’s OVER! Slump-busting Lilly blasts out sleek Jess KO-frickin’-2!

After: Lilly beaming, hoisted high on the shoulder on her corner men and paraded around the ring--sensational return to form reduces Alba to rubble in just 4 minutes of blistering pursuit. Also return to form of sorts for Alba--cowardly first minute opened the door for Lilly, filling her with the confidence to go out and take it to her girl: “Jessica was actually running from me--she didn’t want to fight,” an incredulous Lilly recounts in postfight. “You know--we worked hard on NOT following Alba and giving her the chance to catch me coming in--but I saw she wasn’t set to punch--she wasn’t trying to trap me, she was only trying to get away. I just kept the pressure on she folded up like a cheap…one of those cheap, folding-up…things!” Subdued, glassy-eyed Jessica snippy with press ion her way out of the ring, saying only: “I have an iron clad contract with Jaime Pressly and I expect my next fight to be for her titles. This changes nothing--Lilly is nothing., I’m still Jessica Alba, and who is she? That’s right--nobody.”

Reposted by Archer 5/21/11.