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27 September 2015 Krysten Ritter vs Serinda Swan

Page history last edited by Vassago 8 years, 6 months ago

ANOTHER IFFI PROPOSITION AT THE ASYLUM

Posted by The Grand Wizard on September 27, 2015, 9:03 pm

BEFORE:

"I know Serinda's hit a rough patch," says Krysten with a smile. "And I also know I'm getting better every time out. Tonight's the night I break through in the FCBA at Serinda's expense. It's not personal. It's just what's going to happen."

"She's a girl that should have been fighting up here a long time ago," says Serinda with a shake of the head. "She's got a load of tools and the looks to sell tickets. Unfortunately for her, she's running into a girl with more tools and more looks tonight."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "We're back and that's 'Darklands' by Jesus and Mary Chain you hear, and that can only mean that Bloomsburg's own Krysten Ritter is on the way to the ring..."

McCarthy: "And I don't want to hear any of that nonsense we heard last time about how she's from some city that's a town, but it's not a town and its not a city and it's the only one but it isn't the only one..."

Tess: "That's not..."

Cassie: "Leave it, Tess. I'm surprised she made THAT much sense out of it..."

McCarthy: "Shut up, Scabbo and you shut up, too, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "Drink up, boys!"

McCarthy: "The only important thing to know about Ritter is, she's a typical Dancing Hooker opponent. NO FCBA wins!"

O'Dell: "Krysten into the ring and helped off with the robe. She's wearing that red bikini she likes, and the crowd likes it just as much as she does. And, that's 'Foxey Lady' by Jimi Hendrix blasting over the sound system and here comes 'The Hottest Player In The Game', Serinda Swan!"

McCarthy: "I'm going to have to DEMAND that Weirdo change her nickname to 'The Second Hottest Player In The Game' now that I've come out of retirement!"

O'Dell(sighing): "Swan down the aisle and into the ring. She's helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve and, yes, we do, indeed have dueling red bikinis tonight, as Serinda is wearing the red number she prefers..."

Cassie: "And, for you fans at home, take a look at the two brunette models in the ring in red bikinis and you'll get a pretty good example of what our former commissioner used to call a 'Poster Fight'..."

McCarthy: "The posters for MY fights only needed a picture of ME in a bikini on them. I could have been standing next to a ham sandwich and I'd have still sold out arenas!"

O'Dell: "Aaaaannnnd, the ladies are about ready. Time to get some picks. Tess favors Serinda. Mac?"

McCarthy: "Again, NO FCBA wins. Swan."

O'Dell: "Cassie?"

Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"

O'Dell: "It's unanimous, let's see if our ladies are right. Both brunettes to the long poke early. No surprise, as both are tall and have good reach. They both like to work at range, and you're seeing both show how well they can do it right now. Both getting the jab on target, then slowly working the right hands in..."

Cassie: "And, it's not just the hands, look at the foot movement. It's subtle. Neither fighter dancing, but look at the feet working to create the angles the fighters want."

O'Dell: "This is good stuff from both girls, especially from Ritter, who, of course, hasn't had a lot of FCBA experience..."

Tess: "And, she's not exaggerating about getting better every time. She was outclassed in her first couple of fights, but, she was in the last two before getting stopped."

O'Dell: "She's working smoothly right now, as is Serinda. Swan the harder hitter of the two, no question of that, but Ritter showing she can hang in there when it comes to boxing. Final seconds ticking off in the first and there's the bell. Close. Ritter."

McCarthy: "Palicki would have had this tomato can out of there already..."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second underway and we're back to that ranged warfare. Both fighters want to establish the jab, use it to work right hands. Swan going body a little now, but it's mostly head-hunting for both beautiful brunettes. Ritter double-tapping the jab some, scoring well with both hands..."

Cassie: "I like how she's changing her rhythm up and how accurate she is with the left."

O'Dell: "She is that. Krysten's boxing very well right now, holding her own against one of the most athletic fighters in the division UNTIL SWAN ROCKS HER WITH A RIGHT HAND! A blistering right from Serinda and Ritter staggered back into the ropes. Swan coming after her hard now, looking to get her out of here..."

McCarthy: "Like I said, she's a tomato can..."

O'Dell: "Swan winging bombs at Ritter. Krysten hanging on in the high guard, rolling with, moving the head and shoulders, catching as much of this as she can on the gloves, shoulders and arms. Swan looking for the off switch as we roll into the final 30 seconds. Ritter countering in spots, but mostly taking a beating. Ten seconds left. Good left hook, Swan. Five seconds. Bell! Ritter survives. But, it's Swan wide in the second."

Tess: "And, we're all even at 19."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Into the third now and Swan pressuring Ritter. Krysten giving ground and Serinda advances behind that heavy Front Street left jab. Ritter fighting in counter now, allowing Swan to fight lead as Serinda tries to consolidate here..."

Cassie: "More good work from Ritter. Retreating in good order. Getting counters on target. Swan getting the better of things here, but not rolling over Krysten."

O'Dell: "She most definitely is not. Ritter holding her own, stabilizing her front and NAILING SWAN WITH A RIGHT HAND! Ritter's got Swan hurt after a good straight right and DOWN GOES SERINDA! Another right at the end of that flurry sends Swan to her knees!"

McCarthy: "Swan's going to be an ex-Dancing Hooker after this! Two losses to Bundchen and now one to THIS loser?"

O'Dell: "Referee's count at three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Serinda to her feet. She'll take the mandatory and the referee going to let it continue. On comes Ritter and she's now looking to finish! Krysten backing Swan up with solid shot. Serinda giving ground, will go to the ropes. Ritter not getting sloppy, setting her punches up well, landing some good ones, but Swan shipping it and now countering some. Ritter keeping the pressure on, landing good right hands right to the bell, and there it is. Big round for Krysten Ritter!"

Tess: "And, a 10-8 round that puts her up 29-27."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Ritter now doing the pressuring as we start the fourth. She's not getting reckless, not going all in, but she's going to test Swan's legs here, and she's finding Serinda's still at least a little buzzed. Swan giving ground to Krysten. Ritter not gobbling it. Advancing slowly behind that long left, dropping in solid right hands."

Cassie: "Serinda playing counter-puncher right now, but it's not because she wants to. Ritter's forcing the issue, and, as you said, Jenny, Swan still a bit unsteady."

O'Dell: "And Krysten taking full advantage. She's working both hands well, scoring points, landing solid shot. She hasn't hurt Swan again, but she's landing hard right hands that are forcing the retreat. Swan pinned to the ropes again and Ritter getting off big now. Krysten firing away with both hands, has Swan covering up..."

McCarthy: "Now's the time to turn out the lights and send this Dancing Hooker out the door!"

O'Dell: "And Ritter definitely looking for the 'off' switch. She's bombing away now, putting everything into the punches. Swan soaking it all up in a high guard along the ropes. Ritter rocking her back and forth with big punches. Some of it landing on the guard, but other shots getting through. Referee looking in, but time is going to run out with Swan still on her feet. There's the bell, but another wide round for Ritter!"

Tess: "39-36. Krysten has Swan in a hole."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Ritter looking to work forward again here in the fifth, but Swan holding ground now, banging back, seems to have the legs back under her. Krysten not going to force the issue, goes back to range and wants to box. Not a bad idea, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Absolutely not. She has the lead. No sense trying to do too much and getting caught here."

O'Dell: "And, that's exactly what Ritter's likely thinking. Swan, on the other hand, able to get some offense going for the first time in a while. She's getting that heavy jab on target, setting up big right hands. Again, Serinda the harder hitter, but Krysten's shown some power tonight, and she's showing again that she can box, if that's what you want to do..."

Tess: "And, for a girl like Ritter, one, who, maybe doesn't have the one-punch power of a Biel, Perry, or Palicki, this is the kind of lead she wants. She's up three points, doesn't have to do anything huge, box, score, win this thing on the cards."

O'Dell: "Excellent point, and that's exactly what Ritter appears to be looking to do. She's moving the feet well, slipping and sliding, getting off in combination. Swan doing the same. Shades of round one here, with excellent boxing by both fighters as we come down the stretch. Ritter getting a nice flurry off there, and Swan firing back, landed a good right hand at the end of that, and there's the bell. Close. Ritter."

Cassie: "49-45 at the half. Swan needs a major comeback."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "Sixth begins the way the fifth ended, with the two long, lovely brunettes boxing at range. Swan really working the left hand now, showing some of that double-tap stuff we saw from Ritter earlier. Krysten getting her own jab on target, setting up those excellent right hands of hers. She's got some snap to those things, Mac..."

McCarthy: "The key is, she's very accurate with them. She gets off quickly and she's getting them on target. Not glancing blows, but, good, clean stuff."

O'Dell: "And, Serinda is responding in kind. She's landing with both hands as well, putting punches together, occasionally throwing Ritter onto the defensive, but, not for long. Krysten in pretty good rhythm now, quickly getting back on offense and landing good flurries of her own. This is turning into quite a boxing match..."

Cassie: "And, again, the takeaway here is that Ritter is holding her own with Swan as they box for points. That's good stuff from a girl without a win against a woman who's been top ten..."

O'Dell: "Into the final thirty seconds of the sixth. Both women settling into their rhythms nicely, flurry and counter flurry. Both accurate. Both quick. Both busy. And both landing some hard shot, though neither woman has been hurt in this stanza. Ten seconds left. Good left hand Ritter and Swan follows with a right and there's the bell. Another close one. Serinda."

Tess: "58-55. Ritter still has a comfortable lead."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "Into the seventh now, and the tactical stuff continuing. This is what we've seen the last two rounds, and both fighters seem to want to continue the ranged boxing, which is understandable, as both are having success with it. Ritter doing very well with the left right now, really ranging in with it, not suppressing Swan, but slowing her offense a bit..."

McCarthy: "Again, smart stuff from Ritter. She just wants to manage now. She has a lead. Get a round or two before this is over, get to the cards, and you have your upset."

O'Dell: "Krysten a nice combination and Swan fires back in counter. Ritter backed up a step as Serinda steps forward behind that hard jab and NEARLY DROPS KRYSTEN WITH A RIGHT HAND! A scintillating right from Swan and Ritter is rocked! Serinda pouring forward now, firing away with both barrels. Ritter backed to the ropes and Swan throwing everything she can find at her looking to end this thing right now..."

Tess: "Might be the only way she pulls this out, Jenny..."

O'Dell: "And, Swan may be thinking exactly that. She's going all in here, stepping in to everything, ignoring the counters from Ritter, just firing hard leather at her, looking for the one that puts her on the canvas. Ritter leaning back in the ropes, keeping the guard high, putting the body on sale. Swan not buying at any price. It's all head hunting into the final seconds. HARD right from Serinda shakes Krysten, but Ritter stays on her feet. Ten seconds left. Referee checking this out. Good left from Swan with five seconds. Ritter hanging on and there's the bell! Swan wide, but Ritter avoids the knockdown..."

Cassie: "And only gives away the one point. 67-65 with only three to go."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "Swan looking to finish as we start the eighth. She's coming forward immediately behind the heavy left jab. Ritter giving ground, keeping the guard high, looking to counter when she can. Krysten being careful, still a bit unsure of the legs, but she's answering with good shot, not letting Swan run roughshod..."

McCarthy: "More smart stuff from Ritter. Play defense. You've got the lead. You can afford to let her have this one if you have to..."

O'Dell: "And, that looks to be the thinking from Krysten at the moment. She's circling back, working to stay off the ropes, allowing Serinda to fight lead, just looking to slow down the offensive. Swan pushing harder, walking through Ritter and DROPPING HER WITH RIGHT HAND! A vicious straight right from Serinda off a left jab and Ritter blasted to her back!"

Cassie: "I hate to do this, considering how well Ritter's fought tonight, but..." (Singing) "Turn out the lights. The party's OH-ver..."

O'Dell: "Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Krysten with the eyes open, staring up at the ref. Lights on, but no one's home. Eight. Nine. TEN! It's over! That quickly, it's OVER. And your winner by KO8 is 'The Hottest Player In The Game', Krysten Ritter!"

Tess: "Check the replay on that right hand, and you'll see why Cassie started singing. Here comes the left jab and BOOM! There's the right, on the chin, head swivel, and down goes Ritter. No way she was getting up from that."

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I have our winner, Serinda Swan, and, Swanny, it was tough in there..."

Serinda: "Like I said pre-fight, this girl should have been up here a long time ago, but, it's not too late. She's still young enough, and she's got that big Netflix show, 'Jessica Jones', coming up. I get a feeling she'll be getting more work, and, if she does, she's going to beat people, and not a few of them. And, I hope she gets opportunities, because this is what the Tiffany Division is about, two tall, athletic knockouts trading leather."

Tess: "How important was you being able to turn this around?"

Serinda: "I got off to a rough start this year, but I'm back on track and I needed to stay there. I have big plans, Tess. Plans that involve getting all the way to the top. I was close, before Gisele. I'll get back. And, if you get in my way, you're going to end up like Krysten."