OFFICIAL "HALLOWEEN" SSB PPV
Posted by Lookout! Boxing on October 30, 2015, 5:20 pm
Cassie Scerbo versus Adelaide Kane
(Words: Bazz / Results: Lookout!)
The Wiz settles in ringside along with one Bartholomew Cherchez La Femme Alahandro Hay.
“Hey Wiz I really appreciate you letting me sit with you. These are going to be extraordinary fights.” Smackey reminds the Man In The Hat.
“No problem Alphonse. Any other time you’d be wrestling with Pointy for the seat. We’ve split seats down in the front row for years now. My thinking is it’s always good to do your scouting with a genius. I mean look at this line up Pointy has tonight. A champ and two fighters that should be champs and he doesn’t even have the strength of his camp here, the welters. He knows how to pick winners.” Wiz summarizes.
“Yeah the Bazz Camp has always had strength in all four classes although lightweight isn’t what it used to be in my opinion but we’ll see if Pointy makes a move there. Any news on that front?” Smackey tries a deft maneuver at garnering inside information on the Bazz Fight Club. Yet all he gets is a knowing smile from The Wiz who pulls a PBR out of his custom made dual temperature mini refrigerator located between their seats.
“Here we go! Here come the flyweights!” Wiz stands to get a look at the fighters coming into the arena.
The crowd erupts as the theme to Wonder Woman blasts throughout the arena. Adelaide Kane comes cruising down the aisle dressed as the comic book hero Wonder Woman. She jumps through the ropes into the ring. The crowd is revved up for this fight and is loud and boisterous as the Wonder Woman fighter acknowledges the cheers and raises her hands over her head and prances around the ring.
“That’s some costume! I wonder what our favorite flyweight will be countering with?” Smackey lets out while standing with the rest of the crowd waiting for what comes next.
“Oh I’ve got a pretty good idea that our girl is going to one up her opponent with her ode to Halloween.”
Just as the Wiz finishes a very kicked up rock version of Flight of the Bumble Bee blows up inside the arena. At first the Philadelphia icon and the vaunted reporter have trouble seeing because of all the ruckus but as the small mob of people making up Cassie Scerbo’s entourage gets closer to the ring they can see a blonde ponytail bouncing up and down until one Cassandra Lynn Scerbo vaults up into the air landing on the edge of the ring outside the ropes. She deftly darts between the ropes and lands in the ring and acknowledges the now near out of control crowd.
“She’s Cheetah! That’s Wonder Woman’s main nemesis! Kane’s camp was locked up with her costume how did Scerbo know what she was going to wear?” Smackey exclaims as he watches the diabolical Scerbo bounce around in a Cheetah body stocking and face paint complete with black spots marking her now tan yellowish body from head to toe with black boxing gloves.
“You realize that you just asked me how Cassandra Lynn could be so sneaky.” Wiz reminds one Bartholomew Snappy Pants Alahandro Hay with a sheepish grin.
The two fighters meet at center ring. Adelaide stamping her feet and pointing at her opponent. Apparently an official protest has been presented to the ref with regards to Scerbo’s costume piracy. Suddenly the ref’s microphone blurts out. “See here young lady, I’m not in charge of costumes! You bring up any wardrobe shenanigans with the FCBA! Now you’ve got your instructions let’s keep it clean.”
All at once the Bazz flyweight jumps up and grabs the microphone. “I am Cheetah! I am Wonder Woman’s main nemesis! I will be bopping her head all around the ring tonight!”
The ref grabs the microphone and grabbing Cassie Scerbo’s arm gives it a stern shake as well as a severe finger pointing with his free hand.
Rd 1 Cassie out like the proverbial stalking cheetah. She’s darting in and out on Kane with incredible quickness. Jabs snapping out and head a moving target. Kane knocking away as many punches as she can see and counter punching. Cassie steps into Adelaide with a strong left hand and immediately backs up content to see her opponent’s head snap back just once. Kane swings away with a right hand roundhouse but misses badly while Scerbo reloads. Cassie sneaks in connecting with another jab and a right hand buggywhip to the hip and then gets on her bicycle and spins away. Kane frustrated by Scerbo’s speed and punching accuracy goes after the polka dotted Bazz girl rushing her with a flurry of jabs and right hands. Scerbo dodging most of the damage but Kane is relentless and keeps after her. Both girls moving around the ring and trying to tag the other with point producing punches. Scerbo definitely the more successful, riding her jab to a victorious first round.
“Man she’s quick and Kane’s got agility too. I never get used to the quickness of some of these flys. This one might turn out to be good. It would be good to see Kane do well here and add more spice to the division.” Smackey comments loudly as he types furiously into his tablet.
“Cassandra Lynn is a flame thrower that’s for sure and you’re right Kane is good. I just don’t think good enough tonight. Hey can you check out the traffic on Twitter? I always get a kick out of what the other tykes are up to watching a Scerbo brawl.” The Wiz asks as he withdraws a Little Debbie Signature Series cupcake from the separate refrigerated compartment. This cupcake is a Halloween special with the frosting top configured quite accurately as a snarling Jenny McCarthy with a small cinnamon red hot in the center acting as a large boil on McCarthy’s nose.
Meanwhile Twitter is quite active: From @PannyGirlGreat “I am having to watch this as Adelaide is my girl but watching that polka dotted freak is making me throw up in my mouth a little.”
From @SuperiorShahi “They both look quick. Scerbo seems just as crisp as always.”
From @HudgyTheQueen “Shut it Shahi! She’s smells like a goat and in that stupid outfit she looks like she has a disease!”
Rd 2 Scerbo starts out with the same technique, jab and go. Meanwhile Kane is doing her best to cut off the ring on the roaming Scerbo. Kane finding success by picking an angle and going for it. She cuts off Scerbo several times and bombards her with some clumsy looking but effective overhand shots to her head. Scerbo having to cover up now with Kane having settled into a more aggressive mode. Both girls trading punches with the crowd on its feet. Adelaide pulls off a nifty shimmy to the right and shifting through Scerbo defense with a left hand upper cut. Crowd roars as Cassie backs down against the ropes. Kane looking like a pro now pulling off some smooth looking maneuvers no doubt choreographed by hall of famer Jennifer Garner who is looking to steal an upset tonight. Kane and Scerbo jabbing at each other both girls looking for an advantage as the round comes to an end with Kane having taken the round following Garner’s dance steps to a tee.
“Kane looked good in this round! There could be an upset brewing here!” Smackey bellows excitedly from his seat.
“Son you’re not rooting against Scerbo are ya?” Wiz asks as he settles back into his front row seating with a broad smile on his face.
“Oh sweet Jesus no! Please don’t tell her! I’m just calling it as I see it! Kane is fighting well is all and I have to be impartial! Youknow that!” Smackey’s face suddenly goes as green as Cassie’s famous pistachio pudding.
“Your secret is safe with me. Now just relax, have a McCarthy cupcake and a PBR and let’s check in on Twitter.” The Man In The Hat hands over a Halloween special getting a chuckle out of successfully poking at Smakey’s utter fear of one Cassandra Lynn Scerbo.
From @ReesieGirl “Kane looks good. Wonder if Cassie will come back strong this round.”
From @PanneyBlondeBeauty “I wonder if she could just walk off a cliff wearing that cheap Kmart outfit. Kane better keep clubbing away here.”
From @HudgyHot “I’m getting excited just watching Scerbo having to defend herself. My distaste for her odor knows no bounds!”
Rd 3 Scerbo jabbing and keeping her distance making Kane chase her and hopefully make a mistake along the way. Kane back to trying to use the angles on Cassie. Foxfire ingénue guessing at where Bazz girl is going and trying to beat her to the spot. Both strategies scoring points. Scerbo stepping in and scoring with some damaging left hands while Adelaide using her right hand effectively. Cassie shuffles left and scores with a jab and surprises Kane with a strong right hand. Foxfire beauty lucky to have an arm up to partially block the hook that catches the top of her head. Cassie tries again but this time Kane is waiting and she counters with her own right hand that beats Cassie’s and connects to the blonde’s chin. Scerbo wobbles about the ring having been affected by the shot and the crowd is on its feet. Kane pounces on Scerbo pushing her around the ring with a relentless array of left handed jabs and right hand crosses. SCERBO SHOWING DESPERATION! Cassie covering up against the ropes looking to be in trouble as the bell rings.
“She’s not having a good night Wiz!” Smackey is typing away at his tablet keyboard.
“Maybe but it’ll be good enough to get her through tonight.” The Wiz responds looking over Samckey’s shoulder for more gold from the Twitter front.
From @Hayden#1 “Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! A girl can dream can’t she?”
From @ShahiChamp “Scerbo always feels the fight out this way. Don’t count your chickens.”
From @BetterChampThanShahi “Shut it Shahi! Foxfire is going to win tonight and you’ll be eating a poopy sandwich!”
From @ShahiSingsBetterThanPanney “You’re middle name is poopy!”
From @PanneyIsLucious “It’s Leslie you meathead!”
From @ShahiTooCool “You’re a lesbian? LOL”
From @PanneyPissed “Shut it Shahi! Just shut it!”
Rd 4 Scerbo looks none the worse for wear as she darts out of her corner for the start of the round. Staying low and looking for openings Cassie flicks out some jabs and keeps a now aggressive Adelaide Kane at bay. Kane quite confident now moves in with her own left hands and tries to follow up with a power right hand. Scerbo smells the combo and counters with a right uppercut that catches Kane on the chin. ADELAIDE NOT RIGHT! Kane stumbles to her right suffering the effects of the Scerbo punch. Cassie moves in with a series of combinations that have Adelaide defending herself against the ropes. Scerbo’s punches are a blur pummeling the Foxfire girl who is in desperation mode now. Kane’s head snapping back as she takes some powerful shots from Scerbo’s arsenal. Kane tries to slip out to the left and find some clear air but Scerbo is having none of it. She plants herself to whichever side Kane tries to use as an escape route and punishes her with some serious combinations as Kane swoons along the ropes. Bell comes too soon for Cassie to finish off Adelaide.
“Wow what a come back!” One Bartholomew Aloysuis Sacree Blue Alahandro Hay exclaims as he excitedly noshes on a Wiz cupcake and chugs a PBR. “Now that’s a championship caliber Scerbo!”
“Right you are! I told you she was going to come through! Now I’ve got to see what’s happening on the flyweight wire.” Wiz directs the vaunted reporter to Twitter.
From @ShahiRules! “Hey Panney where you at? Haven’t heard from you in a while!”
From @HudgyJust Great “I’m torn between wanting to see a Scerbutt beatdown and reading about Panney getting pummeled because her girl stinks. What’s a girl to do?”
From @PanneyHallOfFame “You could hold hands with Scumbo when she walks off that cliff from the second round!”
From @ShahiEnjoyingThePain “Ah there you are Haydie. Enjoying the fight much?”
From @PanneyClearlyUpset “JUST SHUT IT! ALL OF YOU ARE AS FULL OF POOP AS SCERBUTT!”
Rd 5 Scerbo looking crisp again. She’s snapping Adelaide’s pretty head back with quick hitting jabs and circling her determined to keep things going her way. Adelaide still a little off from the previous round is none the less working hard to get the advantage back in her corner. Scerbo starting to dart in and out again. Her conditioning is now becoming a factor as she is showing no signs of slowing down. Cassie draws Adelaide out with a feint to the left and a jab. Kane charges at the opening but Scerbo swings a right hand off her back foot and ADELAIDE’S IN TROUBLE! Scerbo’s right hand staggers Kane who is stepping into fence posts now. Cassie dodges a rather uncoordinated Kane and comes back with a lightening quick three punch combo and DOWN GOES ADELAIDE! Cassie’s left hand to the forehead sets up her right hand which hammers Kane’s jaw sending her down. Another Scerbo left trails after the falling Foxfire fighter barely touching her. Ref approaches the sleepy Wonder Woman and counts to ten. 5th round KO for Cassie “Cheetah” Scerbo!
After: Cassie goes over to Adelaide’s corner and gives her a gentle pat on the head. The two flyweights bump gloves and Cassie makes a point of having a brief talk with Jennifer Garner. “I thought that she fought pretty well tonight. You know Rome wasn’t built in a day. She’s only been up with Foxfire for a little while so she should be given a chance to work with Jennifer.” Cassie comments as she walks back to her corner passing Poindexter Del Crunchy who also makes a point of asking Jennifer Garner’s hand. When asked what she said to Garner, Cassie puts it simply. “I told her that she had done a good job preparing her. Garner reminds me of Rohm. They’re both really smart and good with getting a fighter ready strategy wise. That’s Jennifer’s future and it’s a bright one. She can make all the Foxfire fighters better…except for Hayden. She really smells bad.
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