(All Results by Lookout!, Words by Cas)


Apart from a few bouts on the side, December this year is officially vacation-month for the VIXENs, giving most of our girls a well-deserved break from the hard-hitting action these past few months. Unofficially, however, that leaves some of our girls up to their own devices, partaking in their own 'recreational' activities like the Sports Illustrated 2017 Casting Call and Auditions.

The search for Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Rookie 2017 featured over 100 girls who auditioned for a contract and bikini spread for the titular magazine, with the producers (wisely) deciding to hold a beach wrestling tournament to determine who gets the coveted spot. Among the participants this year were prominent models like Erin Heatherton, Tanya Mityushina, Alexis Ren and Kyra Santoro, of which you can see the full list here: www.si.com/swimsuit/swim-daily/casting.

The rules of beach wrestling are simple:

1. There will be no rounds or time limits.
2. The contest is for one-fall, by submission or knock-out only.

After an arduous audition process, the Semi-finals see two Vixens square up against two relative unknown, but equally gorgeous models:

Semi-final Match #1: Kyra Santoro vs Elizabeth Turner
Semi-final Match #2: Alexis Ren vs Caroline Kelley

The winners of both matches will wrestle each other in the tournament Finals next week. Without further ado, let's get into the matches!

Alexis Ren, coming off a shock recent victory over Laura Vandervoort, is getting a bit *too* cocky for everyone’s taste, commenting to reporters present that she has proven herself to be ‘the best in boxing thus far’ so there's little reason to wonder why she wouldn't be ‘the best in wrestling as well’.

Hard to tell whether her opponent, Caroline Kelley (5’8, 125, 32A) agrees with that assessment. “You should have seen Ren in the audition studio, where she practically demanded to be given the contract without needing an audition. Every girl in the room that day rolled their eyes collectively, including me.” Asked about her fight experience, Caroline smiles sweetly and replies, “Everyone says I’m your typical girl next door, and it’s true. I don't tend to get into many fights. But make no mistake - the one thing that pisses me off is an arrogant brat like Ren thinking she deserves everything.”

Stare down taking place on the sand - Ren a mischievous grin on face, hands on hips, clad in white bikini signaling anything but innocence. Caroline strikes the same pose but intense look of concentration as she glares back at her opponent. She’s clad in a sexy blue string-bikini top and bottom.

Referee calls for the bell and we’re off!


00:00 Both girls not bothering with any prelude or warning - at bell, they charge at each other, colliding in the center of the makeshift ring, sand and hair flying as they press into each others’ bodies for leverage, using free hands to slap at face or tug at hair.


00:28 Shrieks continue to drown out the waves by the shore, as both girls seem to be engaged in a catfight rather than a wrestling match. Neither girl is getting an advantage so far - both seem to be equally matched in terms of height and weight. Bodies strain as they push and tug - Caroline tries to use her long legs to trip up Alexis, but the blonde anticipates and shifts her legs just in time, instead elects to send her knee CRASHING up into Caroline's belly! Caroline lets out a sharp grunt as she’s folded over the knee.


01:01 Caroline still refusing to let go of blonde hair though and Alexis shrieks as her tresses are tugged downwards, giving Caroline the chance to send her own Knee-Lift up into the blonde's tummy! Alexis goes uugghhh as wind knocked out of her lungs. Before she can retaliate, Caroline slams ANOTHER thigh into blonde's mid-section. Ren lets out a pained "BITTTCH" as she's knocked breathless again.


01:45 Alexis one hand covering injured tummy, one hand tugging on brunette hair. Caroline licking her lips at having taken control of fight so early, quickly cements it by pulling Alexis into a Standing Headlock, wanting to humiliate Ren further by driving her knee a few more times up into her body. Ren in trouble as knees crash into her abs from the clinch, but sees the next blow and uses both hands to stop it, shoving Caroline backwards and retaliating with a fist into foe's body, pounding until Caroline forced to release.


02:20 Alexis wastes no time - charges forward with a scream of rage - FLYING KNEE CRASHES into Caroline's chin as the brunette crumples, but is stopped mid-way by Ren's Standing Headlock. Ren showboats in classic Ren-style: shows off limp brunette body whilst sticking out her tongue for the cameras, then DRIVES Caroline's forehead to the sand in a nasty DDT!


02:55 Caroline lying motionless face down, save for low moans and her fingers scratching at the sand above her head. Is it already over?? Alexis certainly doesn't think so - blonde scoots onto her body, pulls brunette’s face up by the back of head, whispers something sinister in side of her ear. Caroline’s eyes still closed, mouth hanging open, as Alexis locks both her hands under chin and puulllllls back in a painful Camel Clutch. Now blonde is shouting: “GIVE UP B*TCH!!” Caroline groans back - pain has woken her up as she attempts to get her limbs loose.


04:33 Caroline lying on top of Alexis, folding the once-cocky blonde’s body in half, her legs pinned to either side of her head, her butt cheeks catching wind in the chilly beach air. Caroline takes a moment to appreciate the squeals and protests below her, having just slammed Red into the sand in a Backpacker Backdrop. Caroline had wriggled free of the Camel Clutch earlier by getting her arms free and looping them around Alexis’s long legs for leverage. Ren getting more livid as Caroline’s butt presses down on her face, shouts a muffled, “F*ck you b*tch I’m gonna kill you!!” Caroline just grinning to herself, belly rising and falling in the wind as she takes a moment to rest and plan her next move.


06:11 Wild scramble as Alexis powers free - both girls again tangle bodies and arms as they struggle for control on their knees. In effort to subdue her, Caroline makes mistake of slugging Ren in the tummy! Ren lets out a sharp ouuff, but more enraged than hurt, tugs back on Caroline’s hair, with a yelp from the brunette, and screams in her face, “You wanna brawl?!” then plugs her own knuckles into Caroline’s body, folding her over with one, two, three fists to her midsection.


06:46 Caroline manages to clinch, negating further damage. Alexis squeals as arms are wrapped around her neck and she’s powered down to the sand on her back, her foe now lying on top of her in what looks to be an early positioning for a breast smother. Ren’s eyes go wide with panic as Caroline squeezes tightly around her neck, first in a Frontal Sleeper, feeling her foe’s foes breath hot on her cheek in a sadistic edition of an intimate embrace. Caroline huffs hot air into Alexis’ ear, hissing, “Give up, Alex. If you don't, I’m gonna hurt you real bad.” Alexis chokes, gurgles back, her hands slapping at any flesh she finds, legs flailing in air, then the blonde screams as Caroline bites down on her ear!!


08:34 That was the last straw for Alexis, who sits up immediately, pain providing the adrenaline needed to pull Caroline’s body up with her, negating the Sleeper. Alexis finds the targets she was looking for and digs her elbow repeatedly into Caroline’s chest and belly, drawing pained grunts from the brunette, who’s finally forced to release the hold.


08:51 Alexis pounces like a lioness on weakened prey - her turn to slam body down on Caroline’s, pancaking her to the sand. Kelley, dazed, hears a hiss meant for her: “Let me show you how it’s done, b*tch!!” Alexis grabs her hair and pulls her face into waiting cleavage, looping other arm around back of Caroline’s head for the best grip possible! Alexis breathing heavily into top of head as Caroline fights for oxygen by kicking and thrashing body in the sand.


10:30 Whether by pure luck or resilience, Caroline is still struggling to pull her face free from hated jug hell, but being on top of Alexis certainly has helped her situation - Kelley had twisted body over for leverage, but Alexis had held on tightly, hoping to end it with this last move. But to no avail - Ren loses her grip on Caroline’s legs, so now Caroline is on her knees, trying to free her face, still hidden in Alexis’ chest. Alexis keeps up the taunting, shouting, “You're NOTHING Carol. You completely SUCK compared to me. You’re---” Alexis eyes widen as her entire body is lifted off the sand - Caroline slowly rises to her feet, bringing blonde high up into the air, then SLAMMING her back down HARD in a wicked Powerbomb!!


11:25 Alexis spread-eagled on the sand, obviously having released the brunette after being slammed head-first into ground. Caroline, however, looking in no better shape, faced down on her foe’s breathing belly, lips barely caressing flesh as she sucks in precious air. Caroline is first to recover though, sitting up slowly, then getting to her knees over Ren’s prone body. Caroline then LEAPS into the air, sending both knees crashing down, right into blonde’s tummy! Alexis goes URRRK as her body is jack-knifed upwards, then collapses back down into fetal position. Caroline grabs a fistful of blond hair as she stands, tugging moaning Alexis back up to her knees and letting face rest on her belly. “Who’s the b*tch now, huh?” Caroline huffs down at her foe.


11:55 Caroline could have jolly well ended the fight there and then - another submission hold would have done the trick and broken Ren. Instead, she decides to pick Ren up again and place her in another Standing Headlock, intending to pay her back with that earlier DDT to the sand. Ren, however, recovers from shock just in time. From the Headlock, she slugs Caroline in the belly with two quick uppercuts, intending to disrupt the move. Alarmed at energy still in Ren, Caroline quickly pivots her body backwards, intending to execute the DDT, but Alexis intervenes, uses legs to block. Instead, grabs on tightly to Caroline’s skimpy blue bikini briefs and TUUUGSS the brunette upwards - Caroline lets out a cry of surprise as her body flies in the air and CRASHES into the sand, in a beautiful Northern Lights Suplex!!


12:33 Caroline now in trouble as she just stares up at the sky, chest heaving in and out. Easy for Ms Ren to scoot over (though she does so slowly, out of exhaustion), straddle the brunette by pinning her arms down to sand with her knees, in a Schoolboy Pin. Alexis leans down and coos, “Remember. You’re *my* b*tch.” Ren then rains down SLAP after SLAP on trapped brunette’s face.


13:00 Caroline, however red her cheeks are turning, fights back tears with a deep scowl of defiance. Brunette still kicking and bucking, trying to shake Ren off her chest. With a yelp from the blonde, she manages to overturn Alexis to the ground, but the blonde’s legs remain firmly locked around her neck in a Scissors Hold. Ren now pulling at hair with both hands, mouth still working to demoralise foe: “YOU’RE DONE, KELLEY. GIVE THE F*CK UPPPP!!”


13:55 But Caroline doesn't seem to hear - she grabs hold of both of Alex’s legs - oh my - is she trying for ANOTHER Powerbomb into the sand?? Alexis shrieks in panic as her body lifted into the air for the second time. But this time, Alexis lets go out her grip on hair, allowing her body to extend back down. Her legs are still tightly wrapped around Caroline’s neck, but this move disrupts Caroline’s momentum - the brunette can't effectively raise Alexis all the way up, instead falls forward and CRASHES face-first into the sand, in an unplanned Hurricanrana by Alexis!


14:51 Both ladies suffering from exhaustion now - bodies stir in the sand as they slowly get back to their knees, breathing heavily. Once they see each other though, they immediately lunge forward, bodies SLAP into each other as both girls now resort to nails, fists and open palms to damage each other’s flesh and face.


15:35 Both girls lean into each other for support, one hand tugging at hair, the other plugging fists into bodies underneath, dull thud thud thud into bodies followed by low groans from lips on shoulders.


16:03 Caroline slowly starting to lose the belly punching battle - goes guugghhh after a particularly nasty fist slams into her weakened abs, doubling her over. Alex capitalises, pain still wracking own body, wraps arms over and around her foe’s neck and bears body weight down, pinning Caroline's to the sand and smothering her out with a nasty Anaconda Choke. Ren smiles, kissing her foe's back, as she hears Caroline's desperate gasps for air beneath her. "Shhhh... go to sleep Kelley. It'll all be over soon..." Caroline’s brave attempts at thrashing her body are soon futile - the fight has taken its toll and Ren's hold is too tight. Soon, Caroline 's body goes completely limp. Alexis screams for the ref to get his ass over before she even thinks of relenting the hold.


17:01 Referee scampers over, takes one look at Caroline not moving, and finally calls off the match.


Official Decision: Alexis Ren KOs Caroline Kelley via Anaconda Choke, 17:01 on the clock


After: Alexis releasing an unconscious Caroline back down to sand, sits up to catch her breath. Anger flashes across her face again as she forcefully reaches down, flips Caroline onto her back.Caroline’s lean but defeated body rising and falling, showing signs of life. "You little b*tch. Think you could take me on, did ya??" Ren shouts down into her face, before popping her fist repeatedly down into her prone belly, drawing moans from the brunette. Ren then scoots forward, resting her butt on Caroline's face in a revenge pose for the camera flashes.

Caroline, when she finally recovers, is asked by reporters what went wrong. "I can see why people don't like her. She's a bully and she fights dirty." Asked if there might be a re-match in the future, Caroline scowls at the prospect, stating, "I'd love to have the opportunity to punch the b*tch some more."

But Alexis has had the last laugh this time. She goes on to fight Elizabeth Turner in the Finals of the tournament next week.