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26 May 2018 Taylor Swift vs Mary Elizabeth Winstead

Page history last edited by caspian2 4 years, 4 months ago

TAYLOR SWIFT VS MARY ELIZABETH WINSTEAD

Results: Lookout Writing: Archer

Taylor: 28 YO, 5’11 (1.80 m), 20-13-0, 20 KO since 2009, Empire Boxing

Mary: 33 YO, 5’8 (1.73 m), 45-39-0, 39 KO since 2007, Foxfire Boxing

Before: “I can’t tell you how excited I am to be fighting Mary Winstead,” Taylor Swift eagerly tells the press. “Mary’s always fought the toughest schedule in the Lightweight Division. She isn’t afraid to take on anyone. Of course, I know she’s probably not afraid of me, but I have to tell you all, that this is an important fight for me. I have always had the suspicion that I’m not taken seriously as a boxer. Now that’s been changing since I started winning a lot more often, but I have been able to beat Jennifer Lawrence, Charlize Theron and Shay Mitchell within the last year. Now my goal is to prove I am worthy of another title shot by beating Mary. I lost my first try to Kendall Jenner, but I swore I’d be back and win that title belt. To do that I need to win against Mary. Mary, I want to you know, it won’t be personal. I’m not a bytch like that Yvonne Strahovski person. I just need to beat you and I have never worked harder to accomplish something than I did in preparing for this fight. You’ll be fighting ‘Peak Taylor Swift’. I just want you to know that.”

Mary Elizabeth Winstead looks bemused as she takes her turn at the podium: “Well, Taylor, I would expect any opponent of mine to work hard if they expect to beat me. Sadly, ‘Peak Taylor’will be meeting ‘Maximum Mary’. I am fresh off my victory over Alessandra Ambrosio while you are fresh off losing to Alecis Ren. So it appears you are hesded for another loss and this one from me. Nothing personal. I like you, Taylor. Oh, and ou should not call Vonnie a ‘bytch’. She is—well, used to be—my friend. I can insult her all I want, but I won’t have strangers calling her a ‘bytch’—even if she is one.”

“Uh—sorry,” Taylor says with a look of puzzlement.

“You have to understand Yvonne and I have a complicated relationship. It’s best for outsiders to keep back from it,” Mary said helpfully.

“Oh, I will,” Taylor said eagerly. “I will just focus on knocking you out good and proper.”

“Hmm,” said Mary, “and I will focus on putting you face down, sucking canvas.”

Taylor grinned: “I KNEW this would be exciting and I know it will be! Bring it on ‘Mighty Mary’—‘Super Swifty’ is ready to take you down!”

Mary went over and the two of them hugged. The crowd couldn’t help but cheer as it just not the sort of thing you saw an FCBA presser.

The night of the fight found Mary Elizabeth Winstead in a sunny yellow high-waisted retro bikini with yellow boots and gloves (white laces). Her bobbed brunette hair was wetted down and she had a determined look of a fighter ready for action. Taylor Swift strode to the ring with a firm walk and removed her rode to reveal a red retro high-waisted retro bikini with black gloves and boots (red laces). Taylor’s blonde hair was pulled back into a simple ponytail. The ring instructions went calmly, though Taylor Swift did seem to be standing close to Mary Winstead as though to emphasize her 3-inch height advantage. Mary just shook her head and turned her attention to the referee. Taylor looked a bit disappointed and stepped back, then turned her attention to the referee. Soon enough the instructions were gone over, gloves tapped and the two fighters in their corners. The bell rang…

R1: Taylor trying to use the reach advantage to strike at Mary and keep her at a distance. Mary smacked up to the face and head, but remains aggressive as she tries to work her way in. Taylor punching hard, but Mary moving around with clever footwork and making the tall singer miss. Then Mary finally gets in close enough to strike at Taylor’s lanky torso with driving shots that fold Taylor forward even as tremors go down those long legs. Mary then goes for the jaw and chin, but Taylor proves pretty mobile herself keeping Mary from landing the direct shots she was attempting. Mary was in close and went for Taylor’s body, but Taylor was moving her arms in and out like a piston to pound Mary’s body. Mary was taking hard to the breasts and stomach, but then she managed to drive a right uppercut into Taylor’s chin. Taylor lurched back and Mary brought a right and left to the jaw to keep Taylor in retreat. Taylor was in trouble, but she lashed out with the jab and caught Mary in the nose. Mary shuddered and came to a dazed halt, but shook it off and went on the attack again. Taylor now had her defenses up and was able to battle evenly down to the bell, but Mary’s earlier aggressiveness paid off and she won the round narrowly.

R2: Taylor went on the attack using strike-and-pull back tactics that her height advantage seemed to help. Mary was getting pummeled hard to the head, but Taylor was eluding her counters. Then Mary seemed to time Taylor’s attacks and greeted the blonde with smashing jab to the mouth that brought her attack to a startled halt. Then Mary went to the body with smashing strokes across Taylor’s ribs and hooks deep into her stomach. Taylor was doubled up and shuffling back, but as Mary followed, the blonde fired back with an uppercut that brought Mary to a halt on shaking knees. Taylor came at Mary with blows to the side of the head, but then Mary caught her with an uppercut to the chin. They both seemed momentarily dazed but then came back in close. They struggled against each other provoking the referee to step in and separate them. They slowly seemed to regain their senses as they circled and punched. They then closed in again for some more heavy shelling to the body just as the bell sounded. They both turned away looking more than a little winded. The judges totaled the points and declared the round a DRAW.

R3: Taylor was not giving up on her hit-and-run tactics, though she was clearly making an effort to be less predictable in her attacks. Mary seemed to be having trouble now as Taylor began to score solid shots to the side of Mary’s had and jaw. Mary was also finding her counters not landing with much effectiveness and she plainly grew impatient. Winni charged in, trying to batter her way through Taylor’s long-range and middle-distance defenses to take her on in close. This set off a furious exchange of head shots, Taylor was hit hard to the jaw, but struck back with a slashing right that caught Mary on the jaw and spun her around. Mary then blasted Winnie with a left uppercut and Mary went on tiptoe before CRASHING TO THE CANVAS. Taylor gave an excited war whoop and dashed to the neutral corner. Mary was on her side, shaking her head and pushing herself up. The referee was counting and Mary seemed to concentrate all her strength as she rose to her feet. The count had reached “EIGHT!” The action resumed. Taylor went on the attack, again using the strike-and-pull back. However Mary was now in a tight defense and Taylor was unable to land a finishing shot. Mary looked relieved just to be standing, though Taylor looked disappointed. Of course, the knockdown assured Taylor Swift a winning round by solid margin.

R4: Mary showed definite signs of being effected by the knockdown as the new round began. The Foxfire corner crew had worked hard to help her recover, but MEW was sluggish coming out of her corner and maintained a close defense. Taylor was now ready to close in on Mary and she was working her steadily to the body. Mary did begin to employ her jab and strike Taylor to the face and head enough to make the blonde wary. Taylor returned to the strike-and-pull back tactics. Mary did not venture to counterattack, but she was landing enough jabs to make Taylor pay for her attacks. The round ended in a wide win on points for Taylor, but she had been unable to do much more additional damage to Mary, who looked to be walking back to her corner with a firmer step than she had left it.

R5: Mary Winstead came out fighting in this round and it quickly became clear that she had shaken off the effects of the R3 knockdown. Mary moved in quickly on Taylor Swift and put the tall blonde under immediate pressure with strong hooks to the midsection. Taylor seemed to be feeling the pain from the steady bombardment to her torso and she tried to drive Mary back with the jab. Mary was obliged to become more evasive, but this constant movement allowed her to pop some hard shots into Taylor’s head and jaw. Taylor grew warier after a number of these head punches and tried harder to keep Mary at a distance, though with mixed results. The round ended with Mary smiling and Taylor looking discouraged. The judges gave the stanza to Mary—wide.

R6: Mary was moving confidence now and she kept in close to Taylor adding more and more pressure to her body punching. Taylor was hunching up and pushing out the jab, but it was not keeping Mary back. Then Mary suddenly shifted her attack as Taylor grew more and more preoccupied with protecting her ravaged abs. Winstead rights and lefts struck home against Taylor’s chin and she was rocked back on her heels. Then Mary leaped up and smashed her across the jaw with a spectacular right. Taylor Swift’s long legs suddenly flew up into the air AND DOWN CRASHED TAYLOR! Taylor laid there, legs bent at the knee, gloved hands up to her head as it rocked back and forth. Mary looked down expressionlessly and then walked to the neutral corner. Taylor’s fans could be heard crying: “GET UP! GET UP!” (And a goodly number of MEW fans were helpfully yelling: “STAY DOWN! STAY DOWN! YOU’RE LICKED!”) It was not clear Taylor was aware of the yelling, but she did seem to sit up with alarm when she realized she was being counted out. She looked around in alarm and then tried to stand. Her first effort caused her to nearly fall back down, but she steadied herself and made it upright just as the referee counted “NINE!” The fight resumed. Mary had shrugged at the broken count and went right back at Taylor. Taylor greeted her with a flurry of jabs that smacked Mary hard in the face and then Taylor actually tried to counterattack with some hooks to the stomach. Mary pulled back, moved to one side and went after Taylor’s stomach. This seemed to take the energy out of Taylor and she went to a much tighter defense to finish the round. Mary won the round wide, but Taylor was looking at her with defiance. The blonde was clearly ready for more. Mary was looking at her with annoyance and seemed eager to make sure Taylor got plenty in the next round.

R8: Taylor showed little sign of the knockdown as the new round began and she came out with some speed to challenge Mary. Mary took that challenge and suddenly the bout took on a mobility that had not been seen earlier. Taylor plowed into Mary and drove her across the mid ring with a determined barrage of shot to head and body. Mary was hit hard initially, especially to the head, but she struck back with a beautiful combo to the chin that had Taylor in retreat back across the mid-ring. Then Taylor stepped to one side and popped Mary on the side of the head with such force that the opposite side of her head actually hit her shoulder. Mary stumbled forward, gloves instinctively up around her head, but Taylor could now come hard to the body with such power behind her punches that Mary was jackknifed forward . Then a crouching Taylor erupted with a right she had down at her ankles and brought it as an uppercut crashing in Mary’s chin. Winnie Winstead was lifted off her feet and sent sliding along the canvas before coming to a halt in front of the ropes at the far end of the ring. Taylor dashed to the neutral corner and looked anxiously as the referee started to count. Mary was lifting her head and trying to rise, but just as she seemed about to reach a sitting position, she shuddered and swooned back to the canvas, arms outflung. She was moaning softly, but that was all.

“SEVEN!....EIGHT!...(The numbers were deafening as Taylor Swift fans joined in)…NINE!”…TEN!...YOU’RE OUT!”

THE WINNER: EMPIRE BOXING’S TAYLOR SWIFT DEFEATED FOXFURE BOXING’S MARY ELIZABETH WINSTEAD—KO8!”

After: Taylor Swift screamed with joy as the loudspeaker confirmed her win. She jumped onto the turnbuckle and raised her arms in victory as a huge smile. Then she walked the ring waving to her the cheering fans. Her walk reached the point where a groggy Mary Winstead was being hoisted gingerly to her feet by Rachel Nichols and Jennifer Garner.

“What happened?” Mary mumbled.

“I knocked you out!” Taylor said proudly. “Oh, I have never felt so happy in a ring! Thanks for a really great fight.”

“Yeah, you’re welcome,” Mary muttered.

“Oh, I hope she’s all right. I really did enjoy fighting her even if she did knock me down that one time. That’s when I decided there was no way I was going to let her beat me. Gosh, what a feeling that was!” Taylor was chattering.

“I think we really need to be going,” Jennifer Garner said curtly. “You will excuse us.”

“Oh yes, sure, don’t mean to get in the way! See you soon, Mary!” Taylor called after the departing Mary and then went trotting back to her own corner, still waving at the fans as she savored her victory.

Exciting fight that saw both fighters on the canvas and come back—but Mary Winstead went down a second time and couldn’t come back from that. It was a well-fought contest and an impressive win for Taylor Swift who does seem to be moving back into contention for some future lightweight title shot. Mary now records what could be considered an upset loss, but we expect her to bounce back very soon. In the meantime, the fans have this fight to savor as they look forward to both fighters’ next bouts.