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31 May 2019 Elsa Hosk vs Miranda Kerr

Page history last edited by Vassago 1 year, 2 months ago

 

Posted by Lookout! Boxing on May 31, 2019, 11:38 pm

 

 

Elsa Hosk vs Miranda Kerr
(Emilia's Empresses vs Downunder Boxing)
(0-2 vs 17-7, 17 KO)
Results: Lookout!; Story: Vassago


BEFORE: "So, this is Mean Girls Vol.2? Right, someone has a very bad memory here!", Miranda Kerr dismisses Elsa Hosk's claims that she tormented the Swedish model upon her rise into the Victoria's Secret stardom few years ago - with the help of Lily Aldridge & Alessandra Ambrosio to be specific. "Elsa is just bitter Lily & I always beat her ass in the private boxing sessions we had and let's be clear, she tried to do it all, oil wrestling, arm-wrestling and so on. She could never beat us! Alright, so maybe that's more than she can handle mentally but she's got her chance now. Oh wait, Lily beat her ass AGAIN last month. And I need a win after a difficult start to the season so everyone's a winner tonight! Well, except for Elsa that is!" (winks).

Meanwhile Elsa just wishes the Australian model stopped talking: "Geez, this is what I was saying all along. Miranda is like Queen Bee. She's soooo full of herself! Don't let that cute face of hers fool ya! She's as mean as they come but I will shut her up tonight! Lily beat my ass last time? So what! That was then and this is now!"

Elsa Hosk wears a blue bikini set with yellow trim & yellow gloves. Long blonde hair in loose waves. Miranda Kerr wears a golden bikini top, green hotpants & green gloves. Long light brown hair tied in a high ponytail. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the lightweight division.

Round 1:
Elsa goes NUTS here in the opening period and she means personal business alright! She comes flying into the older model's face and bashes her like Miranda stole her puppy or something! Epic head-hunting mad rush leaves the Aussie woman stunned while Elsa barks in her efforts to destroy her victim with nothing but head strikes one after another... and Miranda wilts under the barrage weaving on her feet alas unable to break free.., Elsa opens a couple of cuts along the way and NAILS the reeling foe with a brutal uppercut on the jaw before blasting her across the nose.. Kerr drops onto the ropes and goes "Oh, Gawd" when she gets SMOKED with an incoming hook on the nose... AND DOWN SHE GOES!!! Fastest PPV knockdown in a long while here as the Aussie stunner gets ragdolled to the side and Hosk seeths more damage to the audience... does Miranda have the courage to get up and avoid the disaster? Yes, she has even though she delays the recovery until the eight signal. She won't slug it back at the Swedish foe though and spends the remainder of the round backpedalling for her life as Elsa's red mist mode actually prevents her a famous victory. She taunts the 'Mean Girl' a lot but can't build on that knockdown anymore and barks in anger when the bell interrupts her chase.

Round 2:
More Swedish pounce as Miranda stays clear of the mid-range tussle and is agile enough to avoid a phone booth struggle to begin with. Elsa has to settle for a single-punching prowl that fails to repeat the early heroics but she won't make Miranda change her approach at all as the Aussie veteran is happy with her half-hearted response and clearly hopes for the Swede to lose her grip or determination down the stretch. This doesn't sit well with the crowd who suddenly becomes very Hosk-friendly before a late tangle in the corner gives the blonde something to think about as Kerr blasts her on the exposed ribcage and thumps on the boobs with an uppercut series that eventually doesn't change the momentum at all but gives the Empresses camp something to think about during the interval.

Round 3:
More of the same in the third, Miranda uses her superior footwork to keep a raging Elsa at bay and it works. The Swedish model wastes more energy in a futile pursuit for more head-hunting damage while leaking single-punch response instead. Miranda bides her time until she finds the opening but she has loads of inside VS knowledge on the Swede so even Erin Andrews in the TV booth admits she knows what she is doing. The crowd is buzzing here awaiting a swift one-two to throw Hosk off guard but Miranda plays the waiting game to the extreme before another late body assault cripples the blonde along the ropes in the closing stages. Miranda whips a good uppercut on the jaw right before the bell and issues the original insult: You fight like a girl, Elsa!" before turning back to coach Nikki Visser: "We've got this one soooo covered, Vizzy!"

Round 4:
Mean Girl on top as Miranda finally drops the hammer on the charging Swede seconds into the fourth. Elsa wanted elite VS recognition so badly she basically walks into a left/right combo on the chin before Miranda flies a left hook on the temple to sink the younger woman on jelly knees. A big right hand plugs into her jugs next and just like that ELSA IS HURT!!! She cries out in pain while trying to catch some air into her lungs but the Aussie brunette swiftly turns up the wick with a brutal uppercut on the jaw THAT LIFTS THE POOR SWEDE OFF HER FEET moments later! Ugh! Hosk flies into the ropes and bangs her head in the process before SLIDING ONTO HER BACKSIDE with a loud whimper. She rolls onto her left side with eyes closed before the count even reaches five so the ref duly waves off the bout! Epic KO4 Miranda Kerr!!!

AFTER: "Geez, look at this sleeping beauty!", Miranda shakes her head in disgust while staring at the smoking heap aka Elsa Hosk but still enjoys a warm hug from coach Nikki Visser before turning her attention to the media: "I told her not to run her mouth or else she gets exposed in front of a packed arena! Getting your ass handed on a silver plate during VS backstage party is one thing but this? Oh my, she will have a HARD time avoiding the media frenzy now. I almost feel sorry for her!"

It's safe to say poor Elsa has been badly exposed by her Victoria's Secret sparring buddies in back-to-back months now. First Lily Aldridge and then Miranda Kerr. It's almost a relief the third alleged Mean Girl around - Alessandra Ambrosio - is the reigning lightweight champion so probably won't bother clashing gloves with the unfortunate blonde anytime soon. That's the only positive the Swedish fans can take away heading into the summer.

Official Result: Miranda Kerr def. Elsa Hosk KO4.

 

 

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