Hayley Williams
(31, 5’2, 96 lbs, 6:8 FCBA, The Dollhouse)
Vs.
Billie Eilish
(18, 5’3, 114 lbs, 1:0 FCBA, Front Street)

Results: Lookout!; Story: Caspian & The Dollhouse

BEFORE:
Lots on the line for American singer Haley Williams, who’s been on a three-fight losing streak ever since losing to Jeannette McCurdy in August of last year. The petite lady is looking remarkably wary as she enters the press hall, and who can blame her? She knows she’s got much to prove if she hopes to have a future fighting in the ring.

“I'm pretty damn excited to be fighting Billie tonight, despite my disappointing 2019” Hayley begins, putting on a modest smile. “I think she's amazing! It's kinda weird though, because I actually want Billie to do well and she's just starting out herself at this boxing thing, so it would feel bad beating her. But I have myself to worry about, and I've lost my previous three fights, and I’m not here to f*ck around anymore. Billie, I love you, but I really need this win, so I'm going all out tonight! I hope that’s cool!" Hayley ends with a dry chuckle.

Billie Eilish of course exploding onto the music scene not too long ago herself, and it stands to reason that her celebrity status means she was eventually gonna join the FCBA itself. Eilish looking as nonchalant as ever as she enters the room, an indifferent determination both inside and outside the squared circle as she takes the stage with a small smile and wave, then heads to the press table for her own response:

“Well, darn, y’know, the feeling’s mutual here. I grew up listening to Paramore, so Hayley is kinda a hero of mine as well. But…I guess someone has to win tonight, right? I respect Hayley enough to give her all I got, and even if she beats me - I would expect nothing less from a badass like her. Let’s just do this and see what happens. Shall we?”

Girls share a mutual embrace when they face off at the podium, both coming in around the same height but Eilish looking stockier, which might pose a problem for the petite Williams tonight. The feeling of respect is refreshing, to say the least, with both Billie and Hayley posing for the cameras with hands draped around each other’s waists, before they wish each other the best of luck and head backstage for their final prep.

Hours later, it’s fight time and Hayley Williams is first to make her grand entrance, jogging down the ramp looking pumped and ready to rumble. The American singer has her favourite Dollhouse colours on as well: a baby blue sports bra and short boxing trunks with white lightning forked across the fabric, which mirrors her electric personality along with matching gloves with her hair (currently) blonde hair in a tight ponytail. Eilish not to be outshone later on, choosing an attire which reflects her own eccentric self: a lime green sports bra that definitely turns some heads with matching lime green gloves and vinyl boxing trunks coloured midnight black, her long dark hair tied in a high ponytail.

In the ring, the pair look like they’re about to go ten rounds at a fashionable discotec, as they set themselves in respective fighting stances. The referee waves his hand and HERE we go with ten rounds of Flyweight action!

ROUND 1:
Lots of movement as we get this fight started, with Williams using her lightweight agility to move in and out of the pocket fast. Williams is banking on her greater experience in the ring and also her plenty years of extra training in the Dollhouse gym in order to outbox the relative newcomer. She pesters Billie with multiple jabs early on, aiming both high and low as she zones in on whatever targets are available. But Billie’s time at Front Street is also bearing fast fruit, evidence from the singer’s tight guard herself, as she blocks and weaves around Hayley’s many attacks. At the end of the day, the Doll’s punches outnumber her counterpart’s, but they’re just not doing the required amount of damage she wants. Instead, Billie’s getting into her own rhythm of counter-hitting after she blocks a couple of Williams’ jabs, paying the Doll back in kind with a smattering of hits to her lips and cheek, making Hayley grunt out loud as another stinger hits home in the final seconds. Wide round for the newcomer Eilish as she’s off to a fantastic start.

ROUND 2:
Williams is fast going downhill from the opening line, and that’s worrisome indeed, as the Doll continues to jump enthusiastically left and right, forwards and back, even as she tries to overwhelm and faze the other songstress. But Eilish ain’t biting, a steady advance of her own as she returns fire with bigger swings aimed at Hayley’s face. Williams narrowly avoids one such killer-hook that almost takes her head off, luckily bounds back in the nick of time and resets several feet away. Despite the common respect from both ladies, even Eilish can’t resist that smirk on her own face as she notes that she has the upper hand in this early contest of wits… that is, until Williams switches her tact mid-round, keeps herself FAR away and begins to use fewer jabs to target the younger woman’s body with greater precision. Billie’s face changes to a painful grimace as she eats her first series of direct punches to the gut, making her stall and sputter in the final seconds, allowing Williams to take the round wide back.

ROUND 3:
Both girls get cocky with a round apiece and here they come straight for each other again, eagerly bounding into each other’s territory before the fists start flying in both directions. They’re each trying to take the other’s head off, and Billie of course making the mistake of going straight for the big hooks, finds it hard to nail the quicker Williams directly on her face. Hayley ducks a first hook on instinct, then weaves her head back to avoid another, continuing to frustrate her counterpart’s efforts. But she ain’t lucky enough to avoid a third swing: there’s a sickening CRACK on the chin as Billie’s uppercut lands its mark, ROCKS the American singer bad and forces her back a couple of paces! A ROAR from the crowd as they finally get to see some hard-hitting action, but seconds later left disappointed again when Hayley goes back to her holding pattern at distance, peppers Billie’s arms with jabs as the younger woman comes in for the kill in the last final seconds but fails to penetrate that jab wall.

ROUND 4:
Contrast of styles from two singers with vastly different musical genres and backgrounds as well: Hayley known as the punk rock princess who keeps moving and jumping about the four corners of the ring, constant bounding with energy, whilst the more melancholic Eilish seems heavier-set in her slow slog towards her opponent. Occasionally, there’s an explosion of action as Williams gets in range of Billie’s ammunition, but the young singer is still too green to know when to fire off what: end result is her punches thrown with plenty of power but not much purpose, leaving Hayley with enough wiggle room to escape the exchange unscathed, then Williams hitting her own punches back into her face during her circle outwards. Not the best round for Eilish, who needs to cultivate more of an instinct to complement her ability. She ends the round looking slightly stunned by another fast combo that stuns her nose and lips, and pushes her colourful head backwards. Hayley lifts a hand to the crowds on her way back corner, some light at the end of this tunnel as she rebounds with another wide round.

ROUND 5:
Advice whispered into Billie’s ear mid-round as the Front Street people do their best to safeguard their newest prospect on the roster. Hayley on the other hand still banking on her limitless energy as she goes back to meeting Eilish head-on, tries to pressure her foe backwards. But Eilish having none of it, allows her arms to take a beating near to her corner, confidently and patiently waiting for an opening to strike back. Hayley going for a hook across the arms is the signal she’s waiting for - the heavier set girl plants her feet to absorb the impact before she ROARS back with a hook of her own, NAILS the poor Doll right on the face!! UGGHH!!! One hook is all it takes to turn the tables here, as Eilish put tremendous power into that one swing, which sends Hayley grunting and half-flying to the side, her head and upper torso tossed like chump-change whilst the rest of her body forced to stumble along, playing catch-up!! No dice though!! Hayley eventually loses her balance and falls face-first to canvas, lying sprawled out by the ropes! It’s a tremendous KNOCKDOWN indeed for Billie Eilish!!

Bad news for Williams, who just a round ago looked on fire for a comeback! Eilish’s calculated moves on the other hand giving her an overwhelming advantage all of a sudden, as the Front Street addition heads back to her corner without breaking much of a sweat! Referee by Williams’ side in an instant, hovering over the struggling girl as the Dolls attempts to rise back up, a mess of dishevelled, rainbow-coloured hair over her face and the rest of her body trembling from the effort. Unfortunately for Williams, her losing streak looks set to continue as she doesn’t make it past all-fours, and the referee has no choice but to wave his arms and signal the end of the fight! It’s over!!

Official Decision: Billie Eilish defeats Hayley Williams via KO5!

AFTER:
Billie breaks into a smile immediately, her star continuing to rise higher and higher, especially now with a second sweet victory under the Front Street banner. She lifts a hand to modestly acknowledge the crowd, but otherwise doesn’t display any overt emotion at her win tonight.

Meanwhile, Williams is back to nursing her bruised ego at having four straight losses strung together at this point. What can the poor girl do to catch a break, we wonder? She’s getting consoled in her corner by Carmen Electra and other stablemates, who are all collectively thinking that a radical change in strategy might be needed in order for Williams to find renewed success in the ring.

In any case, both winner and loser shedding none of that civility they shared much earlier, with Billie quickly separating herself from her fight team and then making her way over to the Dollhouse side in order to check on Hayley. The two women share another congratulatory hug, with Williams clearly fighting back tears on camera but looking genuinely happy for Billie’s success.

Later, Billie grins wide as she leaves the ring, choosing to stop by the press junket to answer some questions. “I feel great about the win tonight but also a bit sad for Hayley…I hope she can find a way to get out of her slump. But I did what I had to do in there…and hopefully I looked good doing it! I’m still learning, but I think I’m pretty f*cking good at this for a rookie. Who wants some!?” Billie raises her fists playfully as the crowd cheers her on. The victorious brunette then waves to the fans as she begins making her way backstage. The Dollhouse camp on the other hand is looking morose as Carmen Electra accompanies a clearly upset Hayley Williams backstage. Seems like the Dollhouse heads have plenty of thinking to do regarding their underachieving rocker after tonight. Guess we’ll have to wait and see!