Olivia Munn versus Rachel McAdams

(Results by Lookout, words by Sceej)

Olivia Munn grouchy at the press conference, “Not only does Tractorpull pick a worn out McAdams to beat me, they basically say I’m too old for a comeback and my opponents are hand picked? Well, that pissed me off and when the Munnster is pissed off, people get hurt … bad!”

Rachel McAdams unimpressed by Munn's tantrum, multi-time champion has seen it all before. “I’ll agree with her about one thing - she’d not too old for a comeback - she just lacks the talent! I’ve got a couple of years on her and I figure I have a title run left in me. Yeah, I said it - I’m gonna wear the belt one more time - and Munn is just a stepping stone!”

Fighter’s have met three times - Munn dropped a KO2 on Rachel in 2009 and knocked her out again in 2014. In between, Rach relieved Ollie of the bantamweight title by a TKO in 2013 that Munn swears was a bad stoppage! Pundits install Rachel as a solid favorite off her overall better record and the fact that Munn’s recent opponents had looked carefully picked.

Fight Night

Munn to the ring to strains of Pearl Jam’s “Force of Nature”, embracing the bad girl role in black sports bra and boy shorts, black gloves and boots, hair in a battle braid, accompanied by venerable trainer Scrubby McGee, a yapping Jenny McCarthy (redundant to say mac is yapping) and the OG badass of the FCBA - Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin. Rachel McAdams white bikini top and briefs, white boots and gloves, auburn tresses loose, accompanied by Foxfire GM Jennifer Garner and chief trainer Rachel McNichols. And as referee TRIES to give instructions, J-Mac takes R-Mac on a profanity laced trip down memory lane about THEIR legendary rivalry - earning a shove from McNichols and nearly setting off the powderkeg BEFORE the bell has even rung. When order restored, Foxfire insisting on only two seconds per corner. McCarthy suggests that Nolin be sent off, and then suggests McGee, before sullenly being sent off herself to sit in the press section next to her “best buddy” Tess Valmore of Tractorpull (Tess groaning audibly at the seating arrangements).

Round 1

Both women out of corners in the half crouch, Rachel a little tighter and more disciplined, Ollie loose limbed. Both are short strong bantams, used to giving up height but making the deficit up with hitting power! Munn opens with wild right hand lead, Rachel ducks and pounds left right to the body. Munn grins the “didn’t hurt” grin (which means it did!) and beckons McAdams on. Auburn haired fighter moving head side to side as she navigates in, slipping the Munn jab .. but clipped with left uppercut and THAT put a shimmy in Rachel’s legs! Rachel backpedals but Ollie is on her, hounding her to ropes with steady barrage - straight right hand down the middle to the abs and reefing hooks to the temples. Rachel turtling up on the ropes, countering with the occasional short right hand, getting brunette’s attention but not stopping the momentum. At bell (or just after?) Munn rings up McAdam’s with a hard right to the jaw to punctuate a big first round for the Munnster.

Round 2

On the stool, Rachel McAdams gets a face slap from Rachel McNichols! “Wake up, girl! You have been in with the best and beaten the best! You are not gonna be bullied by a tramp who should be fighting as a beach attraction at some second rate resort!” And the Foxfire trainer wakes up some of that red head fire! R-Mac out of the corner and meets the Munnster mid ring and shocks her with a left right left to the body. Fiery eyed, brunette swings back with left hook that grazes scalp and eats a hard right hand to the jaw in return! Firefight mid ring and the crowd is loving it! Not a pure brawl - for the most part disciplined fighters, moving heads, elbows in, punching in combinations, head and body - though Munn will throw the occasional amateurish home run shot for the head. Pace and style favors Rachel and while Munn is getting in her licks, she is the one forced to give up canvas, pressed back by classy work of a four time champion. Round to McAdams.

Round 3

Gena Lee Nolin in Sceej corner whispering, “C’mon Ollie, what are you waiting for? Kick her … bite her … no one’s looking …” before being shushed by Scrubby McGee, “Enuff of dat! We fight clean, got it? Clean! Now go take her, Ollie!” Jenny Mac, out of her seat and offering a THIRD voice in the corner, offers some brilliant tactical advice - “Kick her ass, Olivia!” before being ushered back by referee to her seat next to Tess Valmore (did she just put in earplugs?).

Munn nods and out to face the Foxfire fury! Rachel in half crouch, out and over her gloves, Munn now more upright. Ollie feigns jab and throws big lead right hand that cracks McAdam’s skull and buckles knees. Munn swarming now, McAdams shook but still clear eyed, fighting back, buffeting lefts and rights to Ollie’s head and shoulders as the brunette pounds Canadian’s midriff and sneaks in short uppercut that clips the chin. Rach stumbles back and Munnster presses hard … McAdams on the ropes, still moving her hands, denying brunette domination but taking punishment. Bell rings and Munn chests up, giving R-Mac the hard eye, and is rewarded with a two handed shove “Back off, punk!”

Round 4

Rachel McAdams showing the stuff that made her a champion, which includes the ability to adjust mid fight. Baiting Munn by jutting her chin out, taunting “Bring it, bad girl!”, and hot headed Olivia obliges - wild swings and misses with hate filled haymakers that Ray Charles could see coming! Rachel slips punches, counters with left right to head, or right hand to paunch, and then out - never getting greedy, never looking to do too much. Just draw the Munnster into the deeper water, exhaust her, and THEN finish her! Tactical fourth round goes to the wiley former champ.

Round 5

Battle of wills more than a battle of styles! McAdams landing more punches: Munn with a little more power. McAdams lands left jab and hooks right to the midriff, Munn back with clanging left hook to the temple. “Get rough with this b*tch, Ollie!” demands Gena Lee, and Munn clinched trying to force walk a resisting redhead back to the ropes, but Rachel digs feet into canvas. Wrestling in the clinch, clash of heads - Foxfire corner screaming blue murder it was an intentional butt!!! Ref not seeing it but R-Mac is dazed. Munn with shove and slu - bouncing her against ring cables and banging to body and head - punching through her guard. “Don’t let her off the hook!” scream Nolin! Munn with leaping left hook that crashes into McAdams jaw and spills her onto her back! Rachel up on one elbow at “4” … steeling herself for one push to get to her feet but knees give way as the count passes her by … Winner by knockout in the 5th round … Olivia “The Munnster” Munn

Post fight: Munn Hanging over ropes … ranting to Tess Valmore … “Hand picked opponents, huh? This chick was champ four times … is she even awake yet?” Worse than Munn’s crowing is Jenny Mac’s smug smile. All the nonsense aside … then Olivia Munn comeback may have to be taken seriously by the bantamweight top ten!