Jugs of Mass 'D' Destruction on the Beach
Chloe Khan vs Christine McGuinness
(3-3, 3 KO vs 5-2, 5 KO)
JMDD Value: 38I (Enhanced) vs 32E (Enhanced)
Results: BBU; Story: Vassago

Location: Brighton, East Sussex, England

BEFORE: It's time for the first edition of what could be the next best JMDD rivalry in the UK this side of whatever Tamara Ecclestone comes up with in her twisted mind. West Yorkshire's Chloe Khan claims to become the new face of the genre and points to her shocking FCBA JMDD title opportunity where she battled Kate Upton back in January. Meanwhile Christine McGuinness has made plenty of noise through her cleavage value already but personal issues with her soon-to-be ex-husband(?) stalled her progress in the last few months. She still hates Chloe's guts and the feeling is more than mutual as both women came to blows during the press conference where clumps of black & blonde hair were ripped out before the security team separated the two women.

BBU TV's Denise van Outen believes Chloe & Christine can totally destroy each other in the ring; she also drops a scoop that Lookout! Atlantic's Georgia Salpa is rumoured to be interested in fighting both of them in the foreseeable future as well. 

Chloe Khan wears a red bikini set & black gloves. Long raven-black hair tied in a curled ponytail. Christine McGuinness wears a black bikini set & silver gloves. Long blonde hair tied in a custom ponytail. Both women are barefoot. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the welterweight division. JMDD rules apply.

Round 1:
Chloe wants to establish the early control and drives immediate uppercut series on target but Christine fends off the attack and plugs a left hook on the jaw before working down on the brunette's rack in more familiar fashion. Both women clash heads as they lean onto each other but McGuinness maintains her range to drop several clean hits on Chloe's rack that pushes the Leeds woman into a sudden retreat. Christine barks in delight and sets off to hassle the reeling opponent around the ring and she can't hold back from throwing some danergously low shots around the groin once she finally backs her into the corner. Khan manages to stick several single shots on the blonde's boobs as well but they don't carry enough power supply to break Christine's stride so the older woman keeps scoring easy leather and leaves the brunette fuming at the bell.

Round 2:
Christine resumes the uppercut pounce and drills several good shots on the brunette's rack but Chloe fires back over the top and smashes a quick combo into the blonde's mouth before bumping her onto her heels in jug-to-jug contact. Christine swings immediate response but fails to carry enough power from her heels and has to soak up a swarming rush up the middle as Chloe pounds away in furious fashion to stuff the older woman into some quiet whimpers. This reaction only fuels Khan's high-octane drive and she bangs the blonde onto the ropes where she glues her mitts on target making McGuinness scowl in visible pain. Ugh! A quick left hook on the jaw slumps the blonde into more trouble and it's all Khan come the final minute as she hammers away at the exposed rack to gain a loud support from the Brighton audience. She wants to punch Christine topless but runs out of time even as she shakes off the clinch and barks at the aching opponent once the referee pulls her away into safety.

Round 3:
Christine has recovered from the nasty spell in the previous round... only to run into another uppercut buzzsaw with Chloe simply outworking her in a heads up slugging exchange in the center of the ring. Both sets of jugs enjoy a steady ride but the blonde's bumpers are punished in more effective fashion so its owner soon grinds to a standstill while Khan gets to pancake them from both flanks. The slugging assault makes McGuinness scowl in more pain as she seeks respite in mid-distance but Chloe drills right through her solar plexus to cripple her into loud spasms. Another quick bump and the blonde can barely keep her balance before Khan NAILS her with a wild uppercut that bounces off the boobs and catches the chin on the fly. DOWN GOES CHRISTINE!!! The Blackpool native was off balance before that double strike caught her flush on the jaw and she gets laid out in style. Chloe kicks some sand over her torso which delays the count and enables the blonde to escape the proverbial axe. She demands her bikini top to be adjusted but the ref has none of it and sends Chloe packing more punches on target as she drives the ailing blonde on the ropes however the clock expires moments later anyway while she traps McGuinness in a standing headlock for personal pleasure.

Round 4:
Chloe tries to keep the foot on the gas but struggles to connect with the initial uppercut effort and allows Christine to land some quick shots instead. The older woman is keen to regain some respect after that knockdown and she delivers a good series on target but fails to punish Khan in genuine fashion. Both women eventually settle for the phone booth dispute trading vicious punches before a left hook on the jaw drops Chloe onto her heels. Woof. She gets stuck in the sand for a moment and McGuinness digs a not-so-stray elbow to back her onto the ropes where she hauls in a promising harpoon drive on the stomach before another clash of heads slows the action down come the final minute. Chloe barks in anger and lands another unorthodox hook on the mouth and this time she ends up headlocked into a standstill with Christine bashing her on the kidneys in frantic fashion at the bell.

Round 5:
Chloe lets a quick right hook fly into the blonde's boobs and she ducks underneath a wide response before dropping more uppercuts on target until she threatens to spill Christine's enhanced bumpers into the open. Another stray elbow drains more energy from the blonde's tank and she gets stuck on her heels while Chloe simply pours the wrath on in superior fashion. She dumps McGuinness into a loud yelping disarray and drills through her solar plexus with one ripping shot too many. Uh-oh!! BLONDE HUGS HER JUGS and cries out in pain while Khan SENDS HER TUMBLING down on the sand with a vicious liver shot moments later. That should do it as Christine descends into a blubbering wreck half-way through the count and the Leeds brunette gets her gloves removed already. KO5 Chloe Khan!!!

AFTER: "Fookin' slag! That's what you get for trying to hairpull me yesterday!", Chloe approaches the fallen blonde and plants her foot on her jugs before clawing into them and trying to lift Christine off the sand. The screams of anguish are quickly silenced when Chloe places her bums on the blonde's face and performs a reverse facesit while punching the exposed midriff as well. Christine quickly gives up her resistance and begins to lose her breath underneath the brunette's derriere but Chloe simply sinks all the weight over her and renders her unconscious few moments later...

"I can finish her off whenever I want and however I want! This cheap tramp deserves all the dirt and then some!", Chloe rips Christine's bikini top off and leaves her in topless spread eagle demise on the sand. "I have no idea who watched this fight but I'm ready to accept all the challenges!", Chloe winks back to the cameras while wrapping the battle trophy around her wrist. Another one for the collection!

Official Result: Chloe Khan def. Christine McGuinness KO5.