Posted by Simguy on 10/3/2008, 6:39 pm.

Before: “I’m excited,” an upbeat Audrina grins in prefight. “We’re both slender girls with big, intimidating chests…I’m really curious to see if Lohan’s really all that, or if I’m going to out-punch her. I know she’s had a lot of fights, but that’s not going to matter once I hit her. I think it’s going to be the last girl standing!” Lindsay suspending her attempts to talk her way into a title fight, returning to the ring to advertise her wares directly. “Something’s gotta be down about Kristin,” Lindsay says at the podium. “She’s just fighting hack and nobodies--she’s got Rachael Leigh Cook coming up for God’s sake! I just need to remind everyone why Kreuk has an obligation to defend against me. Don’t forget--when me and Natalie were tearing it up with BSE, we were HISC Killers.
We beat the hell out of those girls and don’t think for one second they’ve gotten over that. Lohan-fear is a big part of the reason why Kristin’s ducking me, but when I’m fighting on the same card as the so-called ‘champ’? People are going to wake up and demand we settle accounts in the ring.” Lindsay in navy bikini with big baby blue floral print; white gloves, long blonde hair. Audrina in heartpounding green bikini; pink gloves; long brown hair.

During R1: Lindsay sets a technical tone--jabbing and circling Audrina early, taking away Patridge’s zest for slugging. Once Patridge’s covered up and confused: Linds starts leaning into long, spearing right hands straight down into Audi’s tummy--spanking away loud, forcing a grunting Patridge back with a grimace. Properly softened up, Audrina can’t stop Lindsay from wading in over the last minute--Lohan businesslike about her foe’s breasts: Lilo’s back straight, lips pursed as she steps-to and pounds away rhythmic right/lefts. Nothing fancy--Lindsay just plowing compact leather into offending rack, humbling Audrina, beating her into the ropes, dominating her bell to bell. linds back to her corner with a little scowl of concentration: she’s pretty focused, taking nothing for granted.

R2: Lohan up off her stool with a batting of her gloves: she gets right back to work. Jabs--lateral stepping to cool Audrina down early: Patridge missing her big as she’s pre-empted
By straight face-poke. Long, pounding right hands directed down into Audrina’s stomach--big spanking blasts with Lindsay’s full weight behind ‘em, punching Audi onto her heels, hurting her. Mop up sees Lilo march in close, straighten her back and systematically shove lefts and rights into Patridge’s bulging rack. Lilo switching her shoulders side to side--fists plowing into jug with thumb-side up: just a good honest pasting. Audrina finally slugging back--pushing leather into Lindsay’s jugs, or swinging away wide at her head and shoulders, Lilo able to calmly dip inside arc of Audrina’s punches, often letting ‘em wrap around as the girls stumble about in close.

R3: Audrina feisty--she dips her head forward, sweeps lusty overhand rights and lefts onto Lilo: Lohan face-pasted in early exchanges. Lilo steps out to regroup: Audrina steps-with, extends on a crashing right hand; Lohan’s head spanked starboard--she baby steps to her right, lips pursed, eyes clamped shut, hands stacked right atop left at her midriff, Patridge hopping forward--she’s sloppy, but enthusiastic--swinging away from the hips to beat Lohan ropeside. Patridge drawing roars when she bares her teeth, hulking jugs sloshing side to side with her pitching, Lohan badly buffeted, facing into shellack--she’s getting trounced whrn she crouches off the ropes, licks a tidy right/left against Audrina’s crotch, Patridge doubles up “OH!” stumbling face-first through ropes as a hot-cheeked Lilo walks away hands on hips, chest heaving, eyes blazing. Ref gives Audi time to walk it off: upon resumption, it’s all Lilo. Lohan stiff-jabbing Patridge to ropes; driving in with long, straight rights into midsection; cleaning up crook-armed lefts and rights in behind Patridge’s elbows. With Audrina wilting down the stretch--Linds starts helping herself to succulent fish-hook left uppercuts parked snug in under Patridge’s right breast Linds arching her back to tuck these babies home--weight on her left foot: good looking punch deeply discouraging to young Audrina by the bell. Lohan seething en route to her corner--showing a hardhearted, veteran cold-bloodedness in doing what she had to do to take the round away from Audrina.

R4: Lilo puts it all together: step-and-poke to turn Audrina, touch her up, get her defensive; rangy bright hands straight down into body, beating breath from Audrina/loosening up her legs; gradual encroachment to ring Patridge up with jagged
Left uppercuts to the ribs/short-drifting right hands to chin. Whenever Audrina’s form breaks and she  is staggering--Lilo closes and goes rack, pumping away all straight-backed and busy Workmanlike delivery has Lohan fans breaking into impromptu song:

“Li-lo, Li-lo, it’s off to rack I go…”

R5: Spirited resistance from Audrina: she’s busting up some, getting dug downstairs but she still battling’--baring her teeth and trying to swing away all big-jug n there. Lohan stroked the odd tough show,  but she always in control, usually timing Audi well and  catching her clean. Midway through, that vicious, fish-hook left uppercut in under Audrina’s right breast has Patridge sobbing, buckling on the spot: desperately hurt, she clinches, face all twisted in agony. Linds walking  Audrina into ropes for ref’s break--psychologically damaging for Patridge as her jugs are seemingly backed up by Patridge’s left eye; Audrina’s legs buckled repeatedly down the stretch as Linds tests the chin with stout right hands late.

R6: Audrina with another burst of energy, temporarily backing Lohan up with lopping overhand rights and lefts. Lindsay busing her legs, circles away from trouble, walks Audrina onto the jab, then checks her chin with a GORGEOUS right cross to bring Audi’s back (right) foot forward. Brunette stops punching, stunned by  that blow: Lohan over to offence. Lindsay clearly going for it--opening up with free-swinging lust from her hips--big, lashing lefts and rights striping Audrina’s facer and jugs. Patridge rocked--facing  shabby into punches, stumbling around: she’s proving remarkably sturdy, absorbing a terrible thrashing without going down. At one point, Lindsay’s hooking so ferociously her right foot’s skidding up off the canvas as she torques into shots, all her weight on her left heel. Rip-roaring beating punches Patridge into a stupor, bloddies her nose: she’s left reeling at the bell as Lohan stalks off, mouth breathing hard from the failed KO bid.

R7:  Lindsay a little punched out: Audrina too beat up to take advantage. Patridge a gusty little thing: dukes up, she totters forward, occasionally slapping or pushing ou groggy leather. Lohan’s hands low--often at her sides as she walks around: she’s just regrouping, lifting the odd punch off her thighs to stroke across bely, tits or chin from outside. Down the stretch, accumulation of well-placed shots has Audrina reeling: she hits ropes in swoon, nearly succumbing at the bell. Linds frustrated at the break--steps in from Audrina’s left side to deposit bitter right elbow deep to Patridge’s unsuspecting belly. Audrina cries out, doubles over: ref scolds Lindsay who stalks off scowling, clearly ignoring the official.

R8.9: Lohan’s showing respect for Audrina’s resilience if nothing else: blonde boxes behind her jab, circling clockwise and patiently picking away at Audrina’s battered face. Linds loose, relaxed--right fist at her chin as she pumps the left hand--stepping her poke in and hurting Patridge with it. Audrina rarely offering back now: when she does open up, Lohan calmly scoops her up, embraces her, walks her to ropes for ref’s break. Subconsciously ruinous for Patridge: not once tonight has her chest been able to advance in the clinch against Lindsay’s all-conquering bosom.

R10: Poor busted up Audrina catches a second wind--crowd pleasing big-jugged free-for-all breaks out as both girls lash it up from the hips. Good stuff--teeth bared, hair swishing, breast sloshing, slender limbs sweeping. Lindsay pasted across her face and breasts at times--but she can afford to swap. Audi can’t. Patridge gradually backed up, then overwhelmed as Lohan firmly assumes command late. All Lilo systematically working Patridge over as brunette sits wearily in ropes, face-in-gloves to soak. Lohan cruelly sweeping punches across Audrina’s drum-tight lower back: even this can’t bring Patridge to her knees. Comes back UD10--10 rounds to 0--Lindsay Lohan.

After: THAT’S how champions fight,” a lathered-up Lohan blurts in post fight, clearly agitating for Kreuk. “I battered this girl--a healthy, strong young up and comer--and I took her apart, I’--I barely gave up any minutes to this chick, let alone rounds: I just wouldn’t have it from her. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: I want Mish; I want Kris; I want whatever I need to have to get me in that title fight!” Pundits split on the effort from Lindsay. Glass half full: 10-0 routs are exceedingly rare--the fight will probably get year-end mention for Lohan. She showed her usual grit, but also veteran savvy and ruthlessness worthy of a top contender. Glass half empty: where’s the power? Linds stroked Audrina some terrific leather and couldn’t get the kid out of there--even with near total tactical dominance insuring plenty of clean connects.

Reposted by Archer 10/10/10.