Posted for Simguy on 1/15/2011, 7:50 am.

(Results: Simguy/Writing: Simgrrl)

Before: It’s been a month since her destruction by Bridget Moynahan, but Candice says she’s ready. “I’m young and tough,” she boasts, “OK I took a lickin’--a lot of licking if you know what I mean--and it WAS a truly unforgettable experience, as advertised. But I’ve been training hard for Gisele and I’m ready! There’s only so many opportunities like this and I don’t kid myself the only reason I got Gisele in the ring now is because she thinks I haven’t fully recovered. I sure hope she’s wrong!”

Bundchen huffy and dismissive facing the media. “I’m the acknowledged ‘Alpha female’ of all the models in the world,” the Brazilian bombshell Gisele (no last name needed) says with a haughty toss of her silky hair. “There’s no one who can challenge me; not in print; not in the visual media--and certainly none of those siliconed bimbos from the Internet like Danni and Cindi. I should send a box of candy to Bridget Moynahan to thank her, because I think Swanepoel may still have a concussion if she thinks she has any business getting in a ring with ME!”

“She’s kidding right?” Candice gasps when informed of Gisele’s comment about her being concussed. “I’m pretty sure the FCBA wouldn’t allow me in the ring if I weren’t in tip-top condition. As for Gisele being number one, I don’t know anyone who’d argue with that…alright, Charlize would…but nobody else! She’s the top earning model for like, ever! This isn’t about who’s the world’s top model or who’s married to a Super Bowl quarterback…I’m not even married! So let’s forget about that stuff. This is about me wanting to move up in the FCBA. If Gisele fought more often, maybe we wouldn’t be having this discussion, but I’m a working model who fights and she’s a working model who doesn’t! That’s all there is to it!”

“There’s long been a distinction between ‘working models’--girls who struggle to keep our weight artificially low; and the former models who let themselves go and fill out into a ‘big-girl’. That’s a pretty important distinction and it’s what makes a big fight for us ‘working models’. And before you nask, the answer is ‘no’--I don’t think Gisele left VS because of me.”

The 5’11 Bundchen is only 30 years old although it somehow feels she’s been at the top of modeling food chain for longer than that! Gisele in silver bikini; long brown hair loose and bare feet. Candice in one of her Victoria’s Secret bikinis, a scarlet red thong; she too is barefooted. Red gloves for both. The referee tonight is legendary FCBA welter, Cindy Crawford.

During R1: Early, it’s sloppy, bendy, action from two women obviously eager to put the leather to their opponent. Plenty of free-swinging, lanky, wallops; fighters falling in together; fighting chest-to-chest, far closer than either would like. Swanepoel cupping her left hand behind Gisele’s head, pulling it down while Bundchen pounds. shoves a series of slender-limbed rights flat onto Swanepoel’s taut tummy. Late,. Candice stepping back, creating distance; unfurling a long right cross that connects and swivels Gisele’s head and puts her back on her heels in disarray. Young Swannie showing some discipline; stepping with, slashing follow-up to earn her the round as Gisele frantically covers up, face-in-gloves; taking her beating like the princess she is!

R2: Surprisingly, Gisele comes out tentative, like she’s been punched into an uncharacteristic (for her) reluctance by Swanepoel’s first round pummeling. Swanepoel out of her corner calmly stalking the brunette supermodel--insolently dropping her left to her hip, showing a cut closed-stance--then lifting the uppercut jab combo snappy; following up by bending into a series of viciously slinging overhand rights to chase a wide-eyed Gisele across the ring to her corner. Bundchen spooked, getting spanked like a wayward stepchild; chased around the ring by Swanepoel, does one of her better jobs of not smothering herself; leaving herself punching room and keeping her left high on defense, The second, an even wider round for Swannie who looks nothing like the girl who fell apart in front of Moynahan just a few weeks ago.

R3: More of the same as in the second; Swanepoel deliberately slowing things down; doing some disciplined boxing from long range; showing a gangly up-jab…everything points to her increased technical improvement (she can do it when she’s not rushing or being pressed by her opponent). Gisele dancing around the perimeter; dukes up…Swannie leaning in, spearing straight right hands down into that flat Brazilian gut juuuussst above the bikini line. Gisele not liking it; responds with wild flurries of punching that only leave her vulnerable to pin-point counterpunching from the more disciplined Swanepoel.

R4: Swanny charging out to quickly overwhelm a brief Gisele attempt to reclaim the initiative. Clean left hook unhinges Brazilian knees a minute in and from there, Candice cleans up on the discouraged Gisele. A lanky flurry disorganizes Gisele on the ropes, turning her to her right and as she cringes, Swannie hammers in a slinging right over Gisele’s left shoulder, punching her dizzy headfirst between the ropes, Ref Crawford, seeing no other choice, reluctantly steps in and wraps her arms around the shell shocked Brazilian bombshell, stopping the fight with Bundchen slumping limp on the ropes and defenseless. Gies as a KO4, Candice Swanepoel.

After: Candice rips the mantle of VS Alpha (or the currently fashionable ‘hegemon’; if one prefers that sobriquet) from the numb fingers of a very shocked and disheartened Gisele. It’s a gaudy position--one that tends to support the thesis that Candice Swanepoel is, at least at this moment, the best of all the working models, who’s fighting. Some suggest that a tournament should be held for this class of vixen--though Swanepoel’s rapid rise would seem to argue a tournament would be too little, too late and, in the final analysis, unnecessary!

Once she sheds her gloves, Swanepoel makes a bee line for Bundchen who sits disconsolately slumped on her stool, her still gloved hands dangling between her thighs, She looks up, blinking in confusion at the sight of Swanepoel striding purposefully towards her. Gisele shaking her head, “no” as it dawns on her she’s going to have to walk or fight. Her heart isn’t in another fight and she reluctantly heaves a sigh and pushes herself to her feet and stands facing Candice.

Swanepoel smiles, offers her hand, When Gisele tentatively takes it, Candice pulls Gisele to her and kisses her! Then she takes Gisele’s arm and walks her slowly around the ring, pausing at each corner where she raises Gisele’s arm and invites the crowd to applaud the greatest supermodel of her generation. As they return to her corner, Gisele has tears in her eyes as Candice embraces her once more and gives her Brazilian bottom a quick spank, then turns and struts back to her corner where’s met by Stone, Bell and Theron, The rest of the Academy “munchkins” are jumping up and down at ringside, bouncing around like little Playmate wannabees in heir expensive gowns

Later, facing a surprisingly hostile media, Candice Swinepoel’s is forced to DEFEND HERSELF for not “walking” Gisele in the “proper manner” as the reporter for British Boxing Weekly puts it,

“When I was a teenager, a mere slip of a girl,” the red-faced Candice said by way of explanation. “Most of the girls were alright with me; a few were outright mean and hostile, but most accepted me and left me alone. Only one went out of her way to show me any kindness, and it was the one Victoria’s Secret model with the least to gain. Gisele So tonight was a bittersweet moment for me. Like everyone else I understand she’s the top of the pyramid while I’m still struggling to make my way up. So beating her, that is huge for me. And while most models, maybe all of them, might have taken her for a walk of shame, it just didn’t feel right for me…not now,,,not tonight. Maybe if we fight again in 4-5 years, and I’m at or near the top and she’s fighting to hold onto her position--if I beat her--maybe I’d do that symbolic thing., But after tonight’s fight, there’s not a doubt in my mind, or in most other model’s minds.. Gisele’s till the number one model. I’m just the number one boxing model!”

Gisele graciously waited until Swanepoel completed her moment in the spotlight, then after Candice’s left, Gisele made a brief appearance. “She was much better than I had been led to believe,” Gisele admitted. “Much, much, better. There’s no doubt the best fighter won tonight, I wouldn’t be surprised if, in eight or ten years, Candice is considered the greatest celebrity boxer ever to come out of South Africa.”

Asked about the “walk” afterward, Gisele looked decidedly uncomfortable, “I’m not used to being walked,” she said, her lips pursed. “But I was prepared to do what I must--I did lose after all, But she was quite gracious; told me I didn’t deserve it and she just wanted to ;escort’ me to the four sides so the fans could show their appreciation. It was a very classy thing to do--I’m not sure I was ever as generous when I was in her place. it’s nice to know that shes every but the good girl she was when I first met her. Yes, I’ve heard the stories about some of things that go on after some of these fights, but I don’t know if it’s fair to put that on her. After all, Sharon Stone and Charlize Theron have a long history of that sort of thing, so I don’t know why anyone would want to blame poor Candice who’s new to that outfit. But that’s none of my business; I’ll leave that you writers to sort out.”

Reposted by Archer 3/8/11.