Posted by Simguy 3/20/2008, 6:34 pm.

Before; “Putting boots to buns,” chirps a cocky Danielle in preflight. “That’s what I’m planning for Winona. I don’t think Ryder’s strong--that’s the thing: I know I can back her up and put leather on her. She did punch well against Keira--but those looping shots worked because Knightley’s so tall. Look at me: PETITE! She’ll swing right over!” Ryder fuming--Danielle giving her no respect--it’s almost like Harris never saw “Dracula”, “Edwards Scissor Hands”, or “Beetlejuice”. “Who the hell is this chick?” Winona scowls at the podium, “IS she anybody? I’m Winona freakin’ Ryder and she’s treating me like I’m fresh off the bus ingénue. I am SO kicking this girl’s ass, it’s not even funny.” Danielle prancing pretty in midnight blue camisol top and tap shirts; dark hair straight with bangs; white gloves. Winona in clingy pink cotton camisol top with white lace trim, pink panties; white gloves.

During R1: Winona swinging over top, missing--Danielle bending her knees, then erupting with punches. Big, joyful swings--Harris grinning like a maniac, belting away lusty on Winona’s available face, slugging the taller girl all around the ring. Middle minute--Ryder backpedaling, manages a thick right uppercut into Dani’s jugs: beats the breath from Harris, but she blows into Winona’s jaw with a blunt left hand and plenty of elbow on follow through. Harris catapulting into Winona--Ryder spills to her butt--bouncing with lips pursed “O”--ref rules it as “push” as Ryder’s up ion a huff. Danielle in when ref vacates--sweeping an overhand right to Winona’s left eye as Ryder’s hoisting a right uppercut from too far out. DOWN GOES WINNY! Ryder scooting to her buttocks again, black hitting ropes, head whip lashing: Danielle bending at the waist, looming over Ryder and shouting “YOU OLD BOOT!” Ref pushing Dani back as Winona’s blubbering, trying to push up off her buttocks with both knuckles. Rambunctious clean-up from Danielle down the stretch: Winona gritting teeth, can’t get her butt off the ropes as little brunette barrels in, clobbers head, shoulders and breasts without restraint. Bell: Harris strutting in her little tap shorts--short legs prancing as she looks back over her shoulder all grinning at Ryder; Winona blushing crimson, actually has to be restrained by ref, she’s so enraged by Danielle’s insufferable cheek!

R2: Winona grunting with effort--still slugging over top with sweeping rights and lefts: Danielle doing a good job staying low, bending her knees, then jumping inside the arc if Winona’s punches. Harris squirming in to fight off Winona’s chest, rushing taller girl to ropes and giving her a rough jostling. Ryder all shook up--covering up earmuff: Danielle able to settle into slugging rhythm--pushing her head in between Ryder’s mitts and plugging away both hands to gut. Winona grimacing, trying to tie up behind the arms: Danielle squirming, pushing Ryder against ropes, then clobbering her head, breasts and tummy. Healthy shove and slug from Harris--all Ryder can do to tie up and hang on for refs breaks. During one such break--Harris being bundled back--WINONA SWINGS A CHEAP RIGHT AROUND THE REF! Dani doesn’t see it--punched in her left eye and staggered--Winona storms in all bared teeth and flashing eyes, swinging  low-slung lefts and rights at Dani’s body, Satin cami bunching uup under Ryder’s determined slugging--but Dani WON”T HAVE IT! Harris firms, slugs back crazy rights and lefts, pasting away on Winona’s face, jerking a quarter turn to her right and SITTING HER ON HER ASS! Ryder crying out in protest--legs outstretched, once again she’s trying to push up off her buns: Harris stomping close, shouting down “NOT GONNA HAPPEN, WINNY!”

R3: Winona backing up--she’s standing too tall, head turning away as she thrusts her hands forward, trying to ward off persistent Harris punching. Danielle pitching with glee--big grin as she throws her body into rights and lefts; Winny’s backpedaling. Right hands bounce off Ryder’s skull, tossing her head aside--left hands thug against jug, clobbering Ryder off balance. Little Harris catapulting forward, timing her crouches o get under Winona’s desperate swings, then plowing home with either mitt. Ropes: Ryder sobbing aloud  as she gets ropebound--hated Harris squirming in, fighting off Winona’s chest, pushing Ryder’s arms aside to expose breasts and ribs. Clobbering beat down no pretty--but it’s enthusiastic and crowd pleasing: Dani’s shimmering satins jumping at jug and buttock as her curvy little legs stamp for position inside. Swarming, bludgeoning attack beats Winona awkwardly to her left hip at the ropes--she’s pushing her right hand against Dani’s left thigh, trying to push Harris away as ref moves in with the count.

R4: Dani HURLING herself at Winona--lusty lefts and rights ticketed for chin--Ryder backing away, shutting her eyes and turning her head just doesn’t have the stomach for it. Hard head punching unhinges Ryder’s knees--she’s staggering around, hands at her tummy, eyes unfocused--then hopping to all fours as Dani’s charging in again. Harris preening--hands on her hips--head tossed to the side, eyes closed with a big smile on her face as she struts away: she’s being adorable whole Winona’s hurting! Ryder struggling bravely up--bleeding from the nose and all roughed up: Harris plows back I with a head butt to the breasts (unintentional) and a torrent of jamming punches to Winona’s thighs (unintentional) and tummy. Ryder sitting in ropes, bleating and shouting in pain: Dani squares away, chugs at those jugs all big-girl hup-hup! Harris crowing, unable to restrain her emotions as she gallops into Winona’s heaving rack: Ryder’s butt slips off the ropes and she’s dropped to a seat all cranky-girl. BUTTERCHURN, HARRIS! Dani standing over Winona, working it like a little minx until ref bundles her off--leaving Ryder with tears in her eyes, once again trying to push up off her rump.

R5: Winona just heartbroken: Dani’s landed too much, coming I too fast, punching too vigorously--poor Ryder just being buffeted and bullied around the ring, Fight tumbles into ropes--Harris pin wheeling her arms in pursuit, then plowing face-first into Winona’s jugs while jamming away lefts and rights to thighs and tummy. Ryder groaning--pitching forward: she’s too beat up and hurt to stop what’s coming. Harris senses the hurt--POURS IT ON EXTRA! Li’l jiggler turns up a notch--satins dancing as she jams away straight lefts/rights in palm-down crisscross fashion. Punches busting across jugs and face stun Ryder, punching her to a drowsy seat on the ropes: she’s hurt, just staring into punishment! THE~REF JUMPS IN! TKO5 in rowdy fashion--little Danielle Harris!

After: Harris jubilant--her career-best performance sees her blow the doors off a pretty big-name celeb: Danielle’s over the moon. “I just feel so…so…pretty!” Harris blurts nonsensically--cracking up Sarah and Hayden behind her. “I just wanted to get after Winona--I knew I could--and I totally ran her out of the ring. She’s snooty too, so I don’t give a hoot if she’s feeling bad right now.” Carter leans in, whispers something in Danielle’s ear: Harris brightens, blurts: “Oh yeah--and I want Jessica Simpson, Christina Ricci, Jennifer Love Hewitt and lacey Chabert! I think I showed that I can slug wirh those girls, and I’m totally ready to put foot to buns there!”

Cameras rolling as Hayden appears livid, yanking Sarah by the arm and glaring at her. “What?” Sarah shrugs.

“What the hell, Sarah?” Hayden scolds. “Simpson? Chabert? Hewitt for God’s sake? Dani’s not ready for that.”

“Jealous? Danielle cramping your style, Hayds?”

“Don’t. Don’t EVEN start with that, or we’re going, right here, right now!”

There’s more, but alert Foxfire guys see the audio’s being picked up--move in before even more dirty laundry can be aired.

Reposted by Archer 9/27/11.