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09 Feb 2008 Jennifer Love Hewitt vs Jenny McCarthy

Page history last edited by Dradis 12 years ago

Posted by simguy on 2/9/2008

 

Before: "I don't know how much longer Jenny can ride her Connelly win," Hewitt smirks, going straight for the jugular in prefight. "Great win, don't get me wrong - but unfortunately, there's like a 100 good fighters at bantam, and so far, I don't know that McCarthy's one of them. Let's just say, I have a healthy dose of skepticism where ol' Jmac's concerned!" McCarthy grinning, taking the podium with flare: she returns fire with both barrels. "I think it's adorable how Jennifer's let herself go," Mac smiles. "She looks like a hot-girl's torso glued onto a horse's ass! Now, me - I'm going a different way. I'm fitter than I've ever been, I mean, seriously (turns to Hewitt) Jennifer - have you seen my abs? (without looking down, Jenny yanks up the bottom of her white tank top to reveal flat, hard tummy; makes a mugging face at Hewitt) You wanna touch that? IT'S LIKE IRON! IRON BABY! I'm showing you tummy - WHAT'RE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT, HUH? TUMMY! IRON-TUMMY MCCARTHY! ABS OF STEEL BABIEEEEEE!" On and on - Hewitt rolling her eyes, showing Mac the palm as Jenny unleashes a stream of consciousness diatribe the likes of which has never before been seen in an FCBA press conference. Jenny in pink bikini with white polka dots - top is laced up betwixt jug; white gloves. Hewitt in purple push up and panties with darker purple lace trim, straps and waistband - black gloves. During ring instructions - ref's droning on while Jenny's shouting "WHO'S HOTTER BABY? WHO IS HOTTER?"

 

During R1: Mac dukes up, palms out, right foot well back - she's rangy here - punching straight rights or lefts off the front foot, sliding back and pivoting to the left. Hewitt moving her head, weaving, but having trouble with the distance - she goes to a closed stance about midway through (left shoulder pointed at Mac, right hand loose at chest, left at her tummy) to roll the incoming while stepping forward. Hewitt timing Mac, turning on heavy right hands from the screened stance: Jenny catching wallop on jugs and face, but managing the ring with feet/class for points in the first.

 

R2: Mac continues to box - feet wide apart, pumping the jab, unashamed to ease back and step out whenever Hewitt encroaches. Jennifer scowling, crouching in her closed stance, crab-like sideways movement towards her foe: Hewitt having more trouble negotiating distance than expected as Mac's tactics prove a surprise early.

 

R3: Similar look for Jmac - bright, crisp straight punches, punctuated by the odd hook off the jab or lead right off the feint. Hewitt rolling punches with that left shoulder, but she gets caught a hook to chops as she's opening up to fire her right: biting blast sends Hewitt stumbling to her left, eyes blinking. Mac grinning wide, hops forward, pounds a straight right down into Jennifer's stomach to chase her all the way to ropes. "BODY BLOW BABY!" Mac shouts, having fun as Hewitt glares.

 

R4: Mac more aggressive, wading in on what she thinks is hurt prey: Hewitt calm, tucked in behind that left shoulder - she lets Jenny come, then picks her up tasty from the screen. Time and again, Hewitt rolls the first right hand she sees, comes back a stunning right blast from the crouch, stepping-with and hooking Jenny's tits as Mac's backing up. Hewitt never greedy - she'll score counters, then close up, inch back, luring Mac forward once again. Jenny's hitting with fearsome power - really pinning her ears back - but it's ineffective aggression: Hewitt staying low, timing the heat and picking Mac apart with pinpoint power in the 4th.

 

R5: Mac's cool head prevails? HUH? Jenny Mac goes back to boxing - chipping away behind her jab, hooking pesky off the jab, looking to drop right hands in over Hewitt's left shoulder. Jmac up on her toes at times - dancing around out of range, circling to curve in from angles. Mack also starting to deploy vicious right hands in above Hewitt's presented left hip: bit of a sidearm delivery, the punch palm-down when it bites in. Hewitt grimacing, but taking it sturdy: she's able to weather Jenny's power, but unable to go over to offence in the fifth. After the bell, beamin' Jenny Mac taunts Hewitt with a serviceable Ali shuffle!

 

R6: Jenny up on her toes again - hands low when she's well out of range. Jmac stepping in off angles - lariat delivery on wide, sidearm rights or lefts - the fists palm-down on scything trajectories. Hewitt crouching low, fielding these withering blasts on her flanks and shoulders - but it's good whippy spank nonetheless. Jenny in and out, springy legged - bringing wide head, then straight-punching the other hand to prevent a counter while she's disengaging. Hewitt bobbing/blocking - taking a pasting, but resolute: she's able to pound several right hands to McCarthy's full rack; catch McCarthy the odd hook-to-chin as Jenny's stepping out.

 

R7: Hewitt taking the sidearm right in her body - IMMEDIATELY turning on her own right hand from the closed stance: JLH catching Mac much more frequently as a result of the uptempo timing. Jenny looking a little startled: Hewitt much heavier handed than McCarthy may have been remembering: Jennifer Love able to cut off the ring, force more toe-to-toe exchanges. Mac refusing to back down, stooping forward to bump shoulders and work inside: Hewitt able to reach with both hands, scoring heavily to breadbasket, jug and jaw. Mac hooking Jennifer's rack in reprisal - pretty spicy when both girls hunker down and get after jug with tight-biting hooks.

 

R8: Mac back on her toes, bouncing in, sweeping that lariat right palm-down into Hewitt's flank: JLH grimacing - finally honors the punch by going to a more open stance. Jenny leading with the rangy right downstairs, then hooking tight to jug and jaw - tart tic-tac-toe being scored by blonde fists. Hewitt rocked on her heels on occasions: she's catching clean, hard stroke here, getting moved off her stance. Mac loving it - sticking out her tongue - eyes playful and dancing as she pours it on: Hewitt busting up a little as Jenny's hooks find the mark.

 

R9: HEWITT bangs back! Jmac caught a drifting right as Hewitt leans in to drive it home: blonde head tossed hard-right; Mac's hands stacked at her tummy, elbows out as she takes. McCarthy woozy to ropes, hands low: Hewitt stepping-with, turning on withering right crosses to chin - back into Mac's gut a tidy hook off the right foot. Hewitt surprisingly strong attacking Jmac on the ropes - Jenny staying low, rotating her torso like a patient cobra - leaning into sudden, hammering rights, then cleaning up hooks. Mac facing into punishment - she's woozy, not making good decision: time and again, Hewitt rights are detonating off Mac's face, busting HER up in turn. Jenny gobbling leather - occasionally buckling to sag into ropes, but she stays upright - stubbornly hanging in there, blocking the odd shot while simply taking the rest. JLH pumped at the bell - hooking McCarthy late to the breasts: Jenny snarling, swinging back hot: ref has to get hands dirty as busty beauties brawl into overtime.

 

R10: Mac just facing into Hewitt's right hands: JLH has the range, has the timing, just PASTING Jenny into stupor. McCarthy hands tummy-high, wandering away - trying to tic-toc her torso side to side to weave - but Hewitt a master at keeping her intentions a secret to the very last moment. Mac driven to ropes again - apparently reluctant to cover up: she sets feet in a sturdy A-frame, butt back, torso forward, looking to swap. Hewitt obliging - pawing her jab from the crouch, then leaning into heartfelt rights, cleaning up hooks as she switches to right foot. Mac's head tossed hard to starboard - she's routinely slammed back into the ropes, then hooked hard breasts and face, but Jenny's legs hold firm. Jmac open-mouthed, getting roasted, but doing enough to keep the ref from doing anything rash: McCarthy digging back at Hewitt's tummy and tits with workmanlike uppercuts when the girls lean in together. Bell, comes back a close duke - UD10 Jenny McCarthy.

 

After: Hewitt spurned, obviously angry with herself: slow start cost her the fight as McCarthy sets a good pace tonight. Mac playing the clown, but showing a wide variety of skills - sharper pundits beginning to see the cunning behind her antics. "I beat her with hotness," Jenny chimes in postfight, proudly brandishing a blackening mouse under her left eye. "My bikini beat her - look at this thing (thumbs at her waist, chest sticking out) am I rockin' the polka dots or what? Chicks quit a bit when they see me in this. Seriously - you know, Hewitt -when I worked out with her some years back - she was a bit of a punk. She was a whiny primadonna, but not now. Girl took some whopper shots from me, and was taking it to ME late. She's the fat tub of goo - I'M the conditioned athlete, but her punches had me gassed down the stretch, so I gotta give her props."

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