Posted by Simguy on 2/11/2005

Before: Jeans and tank tops scuffle at the very first press junket - both blondes looking to be the dominant girl, suffering not even the hint of an insult from the other.

"I'm not taking any of her crap," says a determined Jenny O'Dell in prefight. "She might boss the rest of the FCBA around, she might intimidate other girls during the weigh in, but I won't have it. Anything she puts on me she's getting back double."

Theron attack oriented her side of the dais. "I love the way Jenny played gatekeeper for Charisma last time out - basically just waving the red cape at Krista and letting her storm on past. You know, I pretty much ignore most of the small 's' starlets, but every once in a while, one of them's just so irritating and brazen I have to step in and stop the insanity. I'm tired of hearing how tough Jenny is, how strong she is, how big she hits. I can see the BLONDE! magazine headlines now: 'Charlize Bytch Slaps O'Dell', 'Charlize Puts Jenny On Stretcher', 'Dominant Theron Pounds Hapless Wannabe'. I can't wait!"

Charlize in cream bikini, Jenny in pink bikini, battle bun hair.

Tense stare down - girls nose to nose, quivering as though they might start swinging early: neither lass touches gloves despite ref's urging. (I'm assuming blonde Charlize - the brunette look seems as much a prop to me as an eyepatch or fake pegleg - but feel free to correct me if you wish).

During R1: Charlize starting out with pinpoint lead rights, stamping 'em to Jenny's chest and chin, pivoting to the right or left around them, left hand dangling loose at her side. O'Dell getting cracked, turning - dukes're up but she's not pulling the trigger. Second minute, CT mixing in the limber hook off the straight right lead - slicing clout applied to Jenny's chin, cheeks as she soaks up thick shellack and O'DELL GOES WOBBLY BUTT! Accumulation of pounding blows unhinges Jenny's legs - she's floundering, stumbling forward - Theron all grins as she treats herself to paunch via thudding right hand and puts a clanging hook up top. Jenny spilling sideways to ropes - Charlize stepping in on her - Theron reaching in with her left to brace, turning her body into short, cudgelling right hands across the mouth - Jenny's head smashing to the side, eyes glassing over as Charlize pounds away. Crowd screaming late - O'dell drifting, drooping forward, arms out wide in a boozy clasp - Charlize stacks her up strong and goes to town, licking and lashing ribs and mouthwatering jugs with curling right and left uppercuts. Bell: O'Dell staring, tremble-bodied - Charlize grinning, chesting up and letting Jenny hear all about it, prompting referee intervention.

R2: Charlize up on her toes, taunting Jenny: "You quittin' Jen? Baby you don't look so good!" sprucing O'Dell up hard jabs while stepping left. Theron gathering her dukes under her chin - good bandy armed stroke as she steps, drives in shock lead rights, lashes that hook - crowd groaning in sympathy as Jenny's head torques and twists on impact. When she gets close, Charlize cocky, drops her right to her side while fitting thick left hands flat above Jenny's hip - O'Dell just tilting forward behind her mitts, grunting on impact. O'Dell lunging, overextending as Charlize plays matador - Theron easily sidestepping, guiding Jenny past with helpfull hands on the back. CT keeps it midring, extending on blows, patiently breaking Jenny down through 2.

R3: Theron reaching in to thrust jab to belly, dancing to the left as she jabs the teeth, drifts the right hand, mops up the hook. O'Dell following, grimly determined - dukes up at her temples as she gets close, but Charlize keeps beating her to punches. Charlize rotating, mixing up her shots; right hand in Jenny's guard fixes blonde's position, sets her up for sickening hooks across the tummy; thick, strapping hook doubles up hip and ear on Jenny, Charlize pivoting around the clout; greasy lead right carries Charlize in close on her front foot, she arches, gets that licking left uppercut between Jenny's gloves. O'Dell rugged, taking everything dished up, finally gets on the board late with some chopping right hands to jaw, catching Theron leaning back with her hands belly high.

R4: Wild, winging misses from Jenny in first minute slugging - Theron barking laughter, dancing 'round the ring, sidestepping prettily or dropping her hands and bending at the waist to make Jenny miss. O'Dell not discouraged, keeps coming forward, keeps slugging, pawing her jab to Theron's chest to set things up and midway through: BOOMING right on the chops catches Charlize showboating. Theron stomping in fence post holes - tries to cover up as Jenny jumps in right hand, hook, RIGHT HAND and CHARLIZE GOES DOWN! Theron belted senseless as she backs up with hands down - she's dropped HARD to her back - crowd roars to it's feet. Theron dazed, lifting head groggily off canvas - O'Dell seething, jogging to neutral corner - what a turn around! CT shakes off the KO, beats the count, but OH she's hurt and ON COMES O'DELL! Jenny POURING herself at ramshackle Charlize - poor Theron stupified at the ropes, dukes up limp, eyelashes fluttering - O'Dell squaring up and POUNDING away lefts and rights to ribs. Gruesome beat down slumps Theron groggy, unresponsive in the ropes and O'DELL GOES JUG! Jenny carrying in close to stack Charlize up, then shrug-chugging away to the goods - TV beauty just rummaging up great mitfulls of sack - drowsy Charlize drooping forward, trying to tie up and THERON GOES DOWN! Charlize on all fours, belly trembling in and out, mouth open - Jenny with the sauce to shout down "GIVE? CHARLIZE YOU GIVE?" as ref ushers her back.

R5: O'DELL RIGHT HANDS! Jenny stalking, jabbing Charlize to the chest and stepping-with as groggy Theron wanders backwards - HARD right hands upside the jaw smash Theron's head aside, driving her sideways to the ropes. Theron limp, head whiplashing as she hits the strands - she's drooping forward, hands at temples, trying to lay in close and smother Jenny's work. O'Dell not having it - she's just REEFING to those Oscar-winning ribs - getting her head in close, turning her hips and hooking the HELL out of Theron's torso. Charlize groaning, legs buckling but she refuses to give Jenny any more satisfaction: Theron slumps into the ropes for support, digging in rather than going down. Bell to bell Jenny, and not gentle - she's positively breaking out the baseball bat to go at Charlize' flanks, clanging away to chin left uppercuts and clocking right hands. Theron's chin living up to it's billing: Charlize out on her feet, taking murderous punishment in a foggy drowse - Jenny pounds away bell to bell but can't get her out there. Jenny: chest HEAVING with effort, glaring with grudging respect at Theron. Charlize: staggering, eyes swelling shut, busting up - she's a mess through 5.

R6: More Jenny just a-POUNDING away on Charlize! O'Dell knuckling Charlize' shoulders, walking Theron to ropes, then going at her without pity: Theron tilting forward groggy, giving it all up to Jenny. O'Dell's feet set, turning her hips through punches - she's ripping the guts out of Charlize with hooks, shouldering Theron back, then bending to pull slobber knocking right hands across Charlize jaw. Midway through, crowd screaming in anticipation as Theron's hands drop to her stomach, she's just staring into punishment and O'Dell's BLASTING away lefty/righty on the face, eyes bright with KO fever. Charlize won't go and CHARLIZE SLUGS BACK! Tepid, slapping stuff, but Theron catching a second wind manages to brawl her way off the ropes. Groggy hammer and tongs at the bell - both beauties flat footed, pitching and catching clean on stubborn jaws.

R7: Charlize getting herself together - still flat footed, but managing a little step to the left to turn Jenny midring. Charlize' gloves at her chin, slicing jabs finding O'Dell's face, lead right hands setting up hooks - Theron able to step and sling, extending on headshots and busting Jenny up this round. O'Dell getting off in spots, she's found a home for that right hand on Charlize' jaw and she's willing to take a shot to get there. When girls fall in cheek-by-jowl, there's a moment's pushing for position, then both dig away downstairs, arms reaching back and swinging away lusty.

R8: Charlize continues to take the fight away from Jenny, slowly but surely. Theron's legs heavy, but serviceable - just a rangy step to the left or right, limber shooting lead rights, slicing hooks, dashing jabs slanted down into Jenny's body. Midway through, Theron starting to wade in, dipping her shoulders to lick hard, curling blows against Jenny's abdominal pan and bulging jugs - O'Dell crossing her arms, accepting Charlize onto her left shoulder and banging back repeated robust right hands - jugs and ribs - in pleasing late two-way. By the bell they're just leaning in and bumping, stroking each other beefy downstairs. Mindless!

R9: Jenny stepping, bending in and clobbering Charlize upside the head that looping right hand - constant bashing stream of rights harking back to Naomi Campbell or GLN/Theron days. Charlize just gobbling the shots, seemingly numb, left eye swelling shut, but she's not going anywhere: Theron soaking up bombs and getting back into Jenny with straight right hands and rising hooks of her own. O'Dell getting the better of tired back-and-forth shellack - finally forcing Charlize ropeside and palming up to finish strong. Theron dukes stacked chest and stomach, face staring blankly into abuse: Jenny teeing off right on the jaw, left in behind the elbow, bringing her hands back to her chest and reloading for more. O'Dell warned for a little billy-goat action with her forehead - very aggressive leaning in on Charlize at the ropes.

R10: OH the punching! Hardhearted, breathtaking, flatfooted donnybrook - blondes ramshackle, staggering at times, but getting into each other with shattering leverage. Theron rocks O'Dell with a step-n-sweep left hook, cupping Jenny's jaw and buckling her knees. O'Dell roasts Charlize that looping right hand, draws a breathy moan from a spanking hook to the liver. Girls falling in, pushing up muscular on each other's chests, then lambasting one another to the body great swinging lefts and rights. Hateful bodywork sounding out thick and wet as girls lay in and work - no quarter asked or given in savage exchanges. Bell: both girls too exhausted to care - they trade final right hands on the chin and fall into a flailing clinch as ref jumps in. Comes back one point duke...JENNY O'DELL!

After: Battered vixens side by side for the decision - Charlize gobsmacked, mouthing the word 'What?' - O'Dell hissing 'YESSSS!' as her hand is raised - what a fight. Beautiful Theron battered beyond recognition, eating a smorgasboard of O'Dell right hands all night long, suffering to the body. Jenny similarly punished, eyes swelling, face puffy - both girls landed a healthy percentage of power punches thrown tonight.

"I could tell she wanted to punch with me tonight and it hurt her," says a tired, but exhilirated JOD in postfight. "She wanted to slug me, wanted to knock me out, but I just soaked up her best shots and rolled her up. Charlize Theron's a great fighter, but she can't stand and bang with me. I'll be sure to send her a copy of BLONDE! so she can read all about it, since I doubt she'll be able to remember anything past the third round!"