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2 April 2009 Playboy Mansion Fight Card

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 7 months ago



UNDERCARD: Valerie Bertinelli vs Yasmine Bleeth

                  Brande Roderick vs Nicole Eggert

                  Brooke Burke vs Holly Madison





Posted by simguy on 4/2/2009, 6:35 pm

Before: Co-promotion between HMK Fighting Enterprises and JOD Promotions, with Kozar providing Jenny the 'in' she needed at Playboy to once again edge Kiana Tom out of the picture. Fight between two sleek, bendy-backed former Playmates of the Year shown on ESPN...card is sanctioned by the FCBA with HBO buying all the ad-time to pump the weekend PPV. Pretty savvy venture for two champagne sipping blondes: Kozar and O'Dell turning some careless Underwood quotes into a lucrative little spectacle.

"Nobody's more surprised than Sara to see me here," Carmella says with a wry grin in prefight. "I'm still tapped into Mansion gossip - so I knew she was talking huge smack, and I was ignoring it, because really...who cares? But when she went wide with BLONDE! about me? Dropping my name to pump hers up? What did she think was going to happen? You can't just get yourself cheap publicity by slamming other girls in the press; suddenly, it's on for real - it's happening - and I think Sara's still in shock." Underwood pursing her lips, shaking her head throughout: she knows an intimidation attempt when she hears it. "Whatever - Carmella was good in her day, but she needs to face facts: she raised the fighting standard at the Mansion and those of us who followed are better than she ever thought of being. I know she's a pro, but she's going to be the one who's shocked when this is over!" Carmella in her sporty pink fighting bikini - white-belted bottoms; white gloves; white sneakers, no socks (UFC style). Sara in UFC style two piece - bright baby blue; white belted, boy cut bottoms; white gloves; white shoes (no socks); hair in frisky blonde ponytail.

- 4 celebrity bouts make the broadcast (Decesare/Underwood the main event): Val Bertinelli vs Yasmine Bleeth; Brande Roderick vs Nicole Eggert; Holly Madison vs Brooke Burke.

- Entire day of fighting festivities precedes the boxing, as taping for a new Who Wants to be a Playmate begins. Hundreds of contestants are put through a variety of rough-and-tumble competitions to weed the field down to 32. The 32 are then paired off in a series of 3 round Mansion-mill boxing contests...none of the girls are polished fighters, but all are willing young tyros with tremendous enthusiasm and energy. High motivation and emotion also evident as losers fail to make the reality show, while winners are suitably jubilant/jiggly.

- Day-long party and evening of fights is attended by the usual crowd of celebrities, jet-setters, Mansion regulars and other fighters. Key among the latter is the notorious 'Mate Hater Kate Beckinsale, keeping an eye out for vulnerable bunnies.

- Boxing ring set up outdoors on the Mansion lawn - bunnies wander about with drink trays; long, silk screened banners waft gently in the breeze - each depicting a giant sized Underwood and Decesare with the respective year of their Playmate reign.


Posted by simguy on 4/2/2009, 6:37 pm, in reply to "Thursday Night Fights: Carmella Decesare vs Sara Jean Underwood pt1"


DURING R1: Carmella sets a classy tone - repulsing Sara's effervescent attack with single, spearing jabs to face - pounding back Underwood's head, then pivoting-left round blonde right flank. Carmella eyes narrowed, nostrils flaring as she executes firm step-and-poke: Sara quickly poked into compliance - she's well outside, blinking uncertainly, keeping her dukes up to block the incoming. As Carm's connects drop up top - she stoops to ram jabs amidships: tanned, toned, lithe blonde body sounding out loud on impact. Carmella patient, circling - she's bringing the left jab back to her hip - holding her right hand customarily low...but nothing back from a spellbound Sarah in the first.

R2: Carmella with the thought ot systematically reducing her blonde, continues with the heavy-jab/pivot-left routine. Minute in, Sara's made her reads - finally timing a right hand over Carmella's jab as Decesare's bringing her left back low. Punch turns Carmella's head aside: Sara follows up with a swift, slapping left to buffett brunette onto her heels. Pleasing, limber lashing motion from Sara - she's all bared teeth, flashing eyes as she hops in with her shots, generating torque with her hips and slinging 'em wide to Carmy's head. Decesare beaten to ropes, covering up earmuff: Underwood shows savvy by going tummy on flustered brunette. Blonde leaning forward, unleashing a supple, galloping lather of lefts and rights against Decesare's flat waist: stricken brunette groans forward, reaching to clinch. Sara wriggling - pushing Carm's arms up and back, then licking away to jug and head: Decesare again forms woozy earmuff - stooping herself forward. Torrential punching from Sarah: she's lapping at Carmella's paunch until Decesare's elbows creep down to protect, then blonde bats away tic-toc to flanks - slender arms shivering. All one-way - Sara on Carmella: Decesare sitting in ropes, soaking it up face-in-gloves. Final minute - Sara's pace wanes, but not her enthusiasm. "Hey 'old news' - welcome to 2009!"; "That's how we work the body these days!"; "Not so tuff now, hey bytch?" Final moments see Sara swinging sidearm, repeat right hands into Carmella's left-side ribs - blonde's right foot skidding up off canvas as she lays 'em in. Carm sobbing out into her palms, really shaking under the blasts: it's the proudest moment of Underwood's career. Bell: blonde all perky - pushing Carm upright against ropes, making aggressive eye-contact before jogging back all ponytails and puppydogs to her corner. Sara grinning, throwing big lefts and rights into her trainer's open palms before taking her stool. Decesare in tatters, visibly hurt to the ribcage. Carm's trainer reminds her: "Baby, if you get in trouble like that again - take a knee - we got plenty of time..." Decesare's eyes instantly aflame as she snarls back: "Kneel to HER? NEVER!"

R3: Sara at her girl: Carmella still wincing, cringing, yielding the initiative. Underwood upbeat - big smile, ponytail tossing as she gets off perky, punching without fear. Sara working her jab to Carmella's breasts, then hooking them - the hook swiping across palm-down, pinching Decesare's face in pain. Nice bip-bap-bop left/right/lefts from Sara - straight, poking punches scrubbing at Carm's face and prepared defenses. It's all entertaining and busy, but Decesare absorbing it well: by the final minute - Carm's jabbing; lowering left shoulder into Sara's body; pivoting right around the shoulder-hinge; hooking Sara's breasts or tummy lanky from the fresh angle. Underwood getting turned, then clouted: she stops punching late, frowning in confusion.

R4: If Carmella has a serious fault, it's bringing the jab back low. She's caught at the minute mark - Sara timing her right over Decesare's low left, turning Carmella's head suddenly starboard. Quick-swipe lefts and rights slap and bat Carmella's face: she's blinking on her heels as light-hitting but energetic blonde storms forward. Ropes: Carmella digs in at apron, rolling her torso, keeping elbows in, dukes up; she's alert, just defending the pocket as Sara unleashes. Underwood frisky, but often slapping or pushing shots in her excitement. Decesare able to sponge punches on her flanks, then lick back solid receipts: right hands to golden brown tummy; left hooks swiped slick to chin in close. Sara's round, but she's clearly flustered at Carmella's defiance as brunette straightens, shakes her head 'No' after the bell.

R5: Carm: right hand curled into her chest; left jab up off her hip, spreading Sara out. Decesare getting back to that sweet push-in with the left shoulder/pivot-right routine: turning Sarah counterclockwise, then cuffing her hooks tummy or jug. Underwood frowning, confused: moving her feet stops her from punching. Carmella easing in and out with her shoulder - pivoting gracefully: she's supple and lanky here, getting her mojo back. Single, strapping hooks evolve into swiping sequences of lithe lefts and rights, body and head off the pivots: Sara's legs starting to shimmy as she's touched up. Half way point, vicious left hook off the front (left) foot snatches at Sara's tummy: she cries out, bunches up, drops her elbows all the way to her belly button. Still on her left leg, Carm slices a limber right across Sara's mouth; shifts weight to right leg while sliding left hook across chin and it's BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Underwood stroked to her glutes: she sits up snivelling, blinking back tears as Carmella glares down en route to neutral corner.

R6: Sara discouraged - aggression way down as she tentatively inches forward behind raised dukes. Carmella's eyes blazing: she's in limber crouch, dangling that left hand low - right hand curled into her chest as she works in-and-out, pivots to her right to turn Sara counterclockwise. Gorgeous, sinewy stuff from Carmella: unhurried, she gets after Sara lanky - lifting the jab into her; hooking her supple; stroking her righty from a wide stance. Down the stretch, Carmella dangles her left at her side - just concentrating on plowing single right hands palm-down across Sara's breasts - pivoting easy to the right after scoring, bringing the right back quick to her own chest to reset. 3 such licks from 3 separate compass points score in succession - distressed Sara blurts "NO!" at the third, covering jugs with her gloves to bar the door. Fine with Carmella: she ends the round with a pasting, palm-down right full across Sara's chops - punching blonde face aside at the bell. First smile from Carmella as she makes dancing eye contact with blubbering Sara: brunette prepared to answer brass with sauce as required.

R7: What th'...THEY'RE BLAZING AWAY! Carmella going back to Mansion roots - tossing out the playbook to sling wide, looping shots from the hips - dipping and bending gracefully into wallop as Sara lashes back in kind. Both girls spanked loudly to ribs/flanks; each struck fierce right hands full upside the head or clawed lefty across jug. Gloves bouncing off taut, willing bodies, or spanking against beautiful, shiny faces - just a good old fashioned battle of wills. 2 minutes of limber give and take all over the ring: Carmella's weight of shot and determination start to prevail. Sara blinking in dismay, starting to give ground: she stops punching, stepping away from Carmella as Deech lopes forward. Decesare swinging heavy sidearm rights against blonde left hip/flank - smiting Sara into wobbly-butt retreat.

R8: Sara bears her teeth, pours pesky straight left/right/left combos up the middle: Decesare circles away frowning, puzzled by blonde resistance. Sara's legs a little shaky, but she's hopping forward, snarling, giving her all: time and again, she scrubs Decesare out of her stance, then walks her down. Carm in control - disengaging rather than brawling: she's using her legs, drawing Sara forward with purpose, touching her the odd up-jab to tummy or jugs. Down the stretch, Carmella easing away in good order, then stopping suddenly, diving in with a looping right hand over Sarah's pokey left. Shattering connect with Underwood's skull: pretty little blonde staggered on the spot, stunned. Carm uncoils from her deep follow-through crouch - easing onto right foot to sweep the left across Sara's bewildered mouth - Decesare's long arms tracing out elegant arcs - fully extended wallops landing perfectly against Sara's face. Underwood sways a moment, legs locked stiff as she sits-out, then crashes full to her back. Sara moaning in stupor - elbows planted on canvas, hands in the air as her head lolls side to side. She's out: KO8 Carmella D.

After: In stark contrast to the night's earlier displays of post-fight humiliation - Decesare elects NOT to breast smother Sara out, or throw Sara into the Lagoon, or spank her silly. Instead, once Sara's weepy session has died down to snivels - Carmella approaches to have a word: some of it taking the blonde to task for her attitude, but much of it supportive and constructive. Sara sniffling, but nodding throughout, really taking Carmella's words to heart...at least until the next ish of BLONDE! Magazine wherein Sara is quoted as saying "If Carmella and I competed in any kind of kicking or grappling style - I would totally own her. I feel I'm the better overall fighter - she's just a harder puncher than me." Some girls never learn!

Bertinelli takes Bleeth to ropes and energetically beats her down. TKO7 Val as Yas can't answer back.
Roderick hooks Eggert into submission: KO4 Brande.
Burke bangs out Madison in crowd-pleasing slugfest: KO2 Burke.

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