• If you are citizen of an European Union member nation, you may not use this service unless you are at least 16 years old.

  • Finally, you can manage your Google Docs, uploads, and email attachments (plus Dropbox and Slack files) in one convenient place. Claim a free account, and in less than 2 minutes, Dokkio (from the makers of PBworks) can automatically organize your content for you.


5 May 2009 Minka Kelly vs Audrina Patridge

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 11 months ago



Posted by simguy on 5/5/2009, 3:16 pm


Before: (Hawaii) - Partridge under contract to Kiana Tom - hoping to roll from the beach to the FCBA in time-honored fashion. Kelly essentially on vacation - apparently jumping into the ring on very short notice. "It's a fight," Kelly shrugs in interview with local press, "I'm here, I'm in shape, and I have no respect for Audrina. Why not swap shots and see what happens?" Breezy day - ring in off the beach a bit - sort of set up in the street as part of an informal outdoor shopping plaza. Standing crowd of a few vocal fans - young guys and gals, boardshorts and bikinis.


Minka in charcoal tank top over pink bra and panties; short tan UGG boxing boots; black gloves. Audrina in bright green tank top over electric blue bikini; short white UGG boots; black gloves. Wind blowing brunette hair into pretty faces in open-air format.

During R1: Audrina hopping-to, reaching way back with right hand, teeth bared as she swings away wide, missing over top. Kelly more patient - dukes about shoulder-high, palms down...she's conscientiously trying to set her right foot behind her, getting her weight and meaty curves set. More swings from Audrina - bouncing off Minka's shoulders or scalp: she's willing to be buffetted while getting set. Kelly joins in: straight, jolting right hand landing on Audrina's face; slightly swinging left hook - bit of a loft on the shot - taking Partridge to chin palm-down. HAMMER AND TONGS! Audrina enraged - she redoubles her efforts, swinging wild, heavy-breasted blows at Minka's head. Kelly brave in the pocket - ducking down in rhythm with her own punching - effectively combining offence with defence. Net result - Audrina's punched ragged: Minka compact, driving in with her weight behind shots, punching straight right hands and slightly swinging hooks. Down the stretch - same right hand/left hook combo lands for Minka: Partridge finally loosened - she sits down in a swoon, dazed and staring after a constant diet of Kelly in the first.

R2: Audrina woozy, but plucky: she's hopping back to the attack, looking to wale away wide. Minka also stubbornly forward: knees slightly bent; right foot back; weight on left leg; hands ready to deliver palm-down jamming blows with the same right/left rhythm. Little bobbing head movement for Kelly keeps her safe: she's slugging busily out of her crouch, basically treating herself to Audrina's face. Partridge's head jerking and toggling: Minka just pounding away - locating Audrina with the straight right, then hooking her chin a swinging palm-down clipper. Partridge breaks down, giving ground in distress: Minka happy, hops forward, swinging that lofting hook from her hip to plow at Audrina's breasts. Partridge chased to ropes: she's panicked, covering up earmuff: Minka sets her feet and buns, squares up, starts working at Audrina's chest with a straight, jackhammering right/left rhythm, palm-down delivery. Kelly curvy and deliberate, grunting as she shoves leather into Audrina: Minka surprisingly effective when she's able to drive straight in like this. Partridge bawling, trying to escape to her right along ropes: Minka with that swinging, but still compact hook punches Audrina's left cheek, knocks her head back, drops her to her buns. Partridge sitting up, snivelling: exuberant Kelly stoops, clobbers her brunette an extra right hand across the scalp as ref rushes in late. Minka bodied off and warned - Audrina whining, refusing to rise. Partridge quits on her buns, refusing to get up: that's KO2 Minka Kelly.

After: Kelly blowing off Tom in the aftermath - she's not interested in a usurious beach contract. Partridge booed out of the ring - good little tilt for the rarely seen Friday Night Lights starlet. "Kid's got curves, strong legs, good balance, and seems very determined," says Beach Beat Magazine in their capsule coverage. "Seems like a good solid bantam prospect who doesn't get the pub she deserves."

Comments (0)

You don't have permission to comment on this page.