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10 June 2012 Jessica Alba vs Jennifer Love Hewitt

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 10 months ago

Posted by simguy on June 10, 2012, 9:05 am

BEFORE: "I remember when Bantam was a glamour-division," Alba says wistfully in prefight. "Now it's over-run by these squat little trolls like Hewitt and Cuthbert...and I'd throw that Miss Saddlebags Minka into the mix, along with fat tubs of goo like Neve and Britney. Face it - these girls are massive disappointments to fans YEARNING for a return to Alba hegemony. Well wait no longer, I say...I'm returning to the scene of the crime...I let Jen squeeze by me once and all boxing suffered because of it. Gonna crack down on her this time, baby...gonna crack down HARD!"

Hewitt glaring as Jess plays the body-image card...busty beauty fixin' to make Jessica regret her words. "Jessica's delusional - obviously," Jen snarks. "First - there never was an 'Alba hegemony' - except in her feeble excuse for a mind. Second, I didn't 'squeeze' past her in my bantam debut...I blew the friggin' doors off Jessica Alba! All I have to is stalk her, and hurt her. That's it. With her length, she may win every minute of the fight until I nail her, but sooner or later, I WILL nail her."

Jessica brunette for the fight, hair up in messy beach bun; metallic pink bikini; small black gloves. Jen in scarlet bra-style bikini; small black gloves; brown hair loose, with bangs.

During R1: Jessica loping to midring, widening stance, arching her back, dipping left shoulder and lifting thick, thumping left hooks into Jen's ribs. Succulent, rangy punches landing CHUP! CHUP!...Jen tries to bull past, but Jess slides back in her stance - dragging that lead left foot while jabbing Jen's raised guard. Hewitt can't close: Jess dips left shoulder, bends her back and lifts left hands in CHUP! CHUP! underneath - whacking that body with the first hit, then up into jugs with the second. Jen scowling, forming crossed-arm across her chest, bobbing her way forward...Jess slides out of range while issuing defensive jabs, then slings a heavy right hand up the middle to bring Hewitt to full halt. Jen dips-and-rips again, lifting that rangy left hand once to body, then doubling to chin as Jenny's leaning forward...Hewitt tottering forward on her toes for a moment then HEWITT GOES DOWN! Jennifer flabbergasted, on all fours...Jessi shrieks down "PAYBACK, BYTCH!" as ref's pushing-in. Hewitt up for blinking 8, looking alarmed...Jessica lopes on in, hammers home the long one-two up top, then dips left shoulder, pops hips-right and hoists those hooks! CHUP! CHUP! CHUP! Jessi bangin' Jen's body, then jugs...Hewitt groaning, trying to crouch forward when a rising left jams to a halt on her chin and DOWN SHE GOES! Jen sprawling onto her jugs...getting up hastily and staggering forward onto her knees...getting up again and tumbling over her heels onto her butt...Hewitt starts sniveling in frustration, BARELY beating the count at ropes! Jessica shrieking: "Stop the fight ref, she's HURT! What're you doing? She's FINISHED! COME ON!" Ref lets it go on...Jen forms groggy earmuff: Jess strides in, fetches Jen the one-two up top then gets to crankin' those rangy, rising hooks underneath. Poor Hewitt suffering, just sponging up body blows at bell...snarling Jessica smites a right hand to jug late, bringing the ref in hot.

R2: Hewitt all but out in the first...she's ramshackle off her stool, dukes at cheeks, trying to rally. Ain't broke, so Jessi's not fixing it...she's in wide, sliding, supple stance - leaning in off the slinging one-two; keeping weight on lead (left) leg and arching back/dipping left shoulder to hoist home those rangy, thudding hooks. Gorgeous sinuous whacks really doing damage...poor Hewitt taking in her belly/ribs/tits until her legs shimmy, but when she tries to come forward - Jessi's sliding out of range, pumping out the covering jab to maintain distance.

R3: More Jessica...Jennifer brave, determined, trying to find ways forward. She'll show earmuff, crossed arm - she's bobbing on approach, but Jessica's just murdering Jen to the body. Oh those rising hooks! Big, thick whacking strokes sounding out loud, beating Jenny breathless, or stuffing into her overhanging jugs. Jess able to alter hook trajectory to locate chin as well - rocking Jenny time and again as Hewitt's grimly struggling forward. Alba's legs lithe, relaxed as she slides back in stance, pivots to her left or steps to her right...she's got Jenny on a string through 3 and both girls know it.

R4: More demoralizing, one-sided shellack, Jessi to Jen...Hewitt trudging forward, taking her medicine best she can. Alba laying waste to Jen's paunch and right side ribs - every limber, rising hook a winner. Jenny's jugs taking a beating as well - Alba hoisting left hands up in there as Jenny's cringing forward - and often - Alba's mating that rising hook with a slinging right cross to jug as well. Down the stretch, Alba dips and rips lefty-to-chin, catching Jen a pair of slinging wonders underneath...Hewitt totters up out of her stance, hops to her left, nearly goes down at the bell. Jennifer wandering back almost at random to her corner...she's just toughing this out, waiting on a miracle.

R5: Jess leans in the one-two up top, scoring...Jenny crosses arms, crouches forward to receive the rising, rangy hooks in her body. Jessi digging up tummy; getting around Jen's right elbow; pivoting left off the scores...Jessica's legs in complete control of the ring now - she can move where she wants while poor Jenny's crippled, more or less just turning and turning. Jessica in, out and around - long left arm lashing up into Jen, taking what it wants, then Jessi's circling, looking for fresh angles. Down the stretch, rising left picks up Jenny's chin stiff...she's up out of her crouch, tottering forward spellbound and blinking and THE REF STEPS IN! Hewitt blubbering in protest, but she's SO shabby...TKO5 Jessica Alba in one sided fashion.

After: Alba still furious with the officiating! "First he wouldn't stop her when she was out on her feet early," Jess fumes in postfight, "Then he stops her early when I'm working on the Beating Of The Year. I owned Jennifer Love Hewitt tonight; I took total possession of her body tonight and did what I wanted with it. If the stupid ref hadn't intervened I might well have crafted the perfect fight - maybe the worst beating one woman has EVER inflicted on another...and he robbed the fans of seeing that. Well whatever - Jennifer got what she deserved, and it's a lesson to the other pudgy uglors out there: Jessica Alba is back and things're gonna be different around here!"