If you are citizen of an European Union member nation, you may not use this service unless you are at least 16 years old.
You already know Dokkio is an AI-powered assistant to organize & manage your digital files & messages. Very soon, Dokkio will support Outlook as well as One Drive. Check it out today!

19 June 2012 Downtown Julie Brown vs Catherine Zeta Jones

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 9 months ago

Downtown Julie Brown.jpg Catherine Zeta Jones 06.jpg

Posted by Jac Fac on June 19, 2012, 1:25 pm

Written by Jac Fac

(Retro Bout Ca. 2004)

The scene is Cardiff, Wales; a major sports arena where a challenge boxing match has been arranged between tawny vixen 'Downtown' Julie Brown and 'The Welch Witch' Catherine Zeta-Jones. Cathy Zee has been spoiling for this fight for awhile and feels that Julie is finally ripe for the plucking once and for all.
"I'm just the one who can retire her old ass once and for all," boasted Jones in an interview to the British newspapers and tabloids.

Of course Jones and Brown have one thing in common; each has faced Naomi Campbell and each has beaten her in what, at the time, were considered something of an upset. After that, however, the similarities ended. Brown had racked up a ton of victories in her career against the likes of Darryl Hannah, Liz Hurley, Cheryl Hines, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Diane Lane, Lucy Lawless and Kim Cattrall - to name only a few of her victims. 'Downtown' lost her great coach and trainer, Eartha Kitt, early this past year and had searched long and hard for a replacement before finally settling on an "interim coach", her sparring mate, Lela Rochon who replaced Kelly LeBrock who’d taken enough battering from Julie during their sparring. Lela was stronger and quicker than LeBrock and she was helping 'Downtown' hone her inside moves.

Jones had lost to Peta Wilson in a huge upset and had also been walloped senseless on the baseball diamond by Charlize Theron (who had several defeats at the hands of CZJ herself.) So Cath Jones has lots to prove!

The ref is the veteran Elke Sommer who eagerly runs her hands over Catherine's body after Jones whips off her robe to reveal blue panties and matching blue high heels.

Julie is in her trademark purple thong and she too gets a good, close-up, inspection by Sommer who explains she's just checking for 'foreign objects, although Julie whispers to Rochon, "Does she really think my tits are foreign? Hell, I got ‘em in Los Angeles, for Christ's sake."

Rochon ignores her and gives her last minute advice on beating Zeta-Jones, "Stay close to her. She can be dangerous; don't get careless like you did with Hennessey." Julie had gotten KO'd by Jill Hennessey several months before when she seemingly had the fight won. This was the 'new Downtown Julie' and past mistakes were being ignored, if not forgotten entirely.
* * * *
Round One - Brown closes quickly and hammers Jones with some deft inside body shots. Julie's footwork is much improved with the sessions Rochon has put her though. Downtown wallops Jones again even harder with some vicious 'tit shots' which send Cath Z backing up. Jones is enraged and charges Julie swinging wildly as Julie slips all the punches and fires a scoring shot to Jones exposed jaw. Cath Z is sent sprawling on her ass as the crowd roars it's approval. She is up by six as Downtown attacks with abandon. More body shots connect to Cath Z's midsection. Cath Z's hubby, Michael Douglas, can't believe the poor performance his wife is putting out here. He had hired Linda Kozlowski out of retirement to coach her and his investment hasn't paid off so far.

Downtown ends the round by slamming Cat Z's face with wicked left right speed bag type combos. Downtown is the winner of this round.

Between rounds: Linda K. is coaching Jones to 'use the ring' and make Downtown pay every time she comes close.

Round Two - Cath Z is moving better this round and gets Downtown with a hard right to the side of her face. Julie's legs buckle but she holds steady. 'Follow up follow up' roars Kozlowski. Cath Z whips a scoring left hook to 'Downtown' Julie's head and BROWN GOES DOWN! Julie dropped on her butt by a CZJ left hook! The round is going better for Cath Z; her confidence growing as the sweat roils off her forehead. CZJ uses her upper body strength to muscle 'Downtown' back into the ropes and rocks her, then KNOCKS HER DOWN AGAIN! The crowd is sensing a Catherine Zeta-Jones upset. Suddenly, Downtown Julie Brown is back on her fee mid-ring, motioning to Cath to come get her. Jones looks very assured at this point and Zeta-Jones walks into a flurry of punishing hooks and jabs to the body and head from the 'Tawny Vixen'.

"Don't count your damned chickens yet, you snobby wench,' snarls Downtown as she uncorks an overhand right which catches Cath under the left eye and sends her head twisting sideways. Jones' legs quiver and then buckle. 'Downtown' is on her like a cat...left/right/left; body, head, body. The blows from 'Downtown' Julie Brown find Cath's face and Zeta-Jones is staggered in the middle of the ring. 'Downtown' Julie shows her 'Killer Instinct', thrashing the Welsh beauty with a barrage of blows.

"No more...no more," moans Jones as she cowers in the corner with her arms crossed in front of her face.

"Shut up you wuss," laughs Brown as she pulls Jones' arms down and slams one final shot that folds Catherine Zeta-Jones double before she crashes facefirst to the canvas. Elke gives her a perfunctory ten count during which Jones never moves; then smilingly raises Julie's right hand in victory.

"Damn you can fight when you put your mind to it girl," Elke gushes. "Let's get together for a drink after you change, huh?"

"You got it German lady. And you can have me for the night too," coos Julie as she pulls down Catherine's panties and waves them overhead, then poses with her foot on Jones' bare butt for the photographers.

It's just one more win in the books for 'Downtown' Julie Brown who now proclaims herself 'the new Welsh Champion' adding yet another honor to the great ring feats she has performed in a long and storied fight career.