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23 July 2012 Kate Beckinsale vs Jenny McCarthy

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 8 months ago

Kate Beckinsale 05.jpg

Posted by simguy on July 23, 2012, 3:24 pm

BEFORE: "Enough is enough," a glaring Kate Becks declares at podium. "When one thinks of Kate Beckinsale, there should be no association with Jenny McCarthy - this woman is polluting my brand with every fight. As good as I was before, I am now well beyond her reach following on-set struggles with Jessica Biel (Total Rekall, ed.) Jenny simply is not equipped to deal with a post-Biel Beckinsale. I will erase her in this fight: depend upon it!"

McCarthy rolling her eyes, having a good time at dais...she's used to Kate's pontification at this point. "Blah, blah, blah..." Jenny grins at podium. "Man, she can talk some crap, can't she? Lookee here: me strong blonde girl; you snooty brunette. Me punch you; you quit. That's really all folks need to know, unless Jessica Biel's actually planning to fight FOR you, why even bring her up? You look like the same old bag of hot wind you've always been, and me? I'm a little ol' balloon-popper, baby!"

Jenny in black bikini; wavy blonde hair long, loose; black gloves. Kate in purple lace bra and panties; black gloves; brown hair in loose, long tangles.

During R1: Girls striding to midring with hands at sides, then stepping in slugging! Right hands traded; wicked left hooks...JENNY'S HURT! McCarthy sputtering early, staggering out of orbit: Katie hard-eyed, bounces one-two off blonde gut; hesitates; hooks the chin to get McCarthy backpedalling hurt to ropes. Kate marches in - right tight to cheek as she stoops, hooks the gut; straightens; hooks the jugs. Jenny in trouble, slumping against ropes, pushing back leather: Kate able to POUND a short right hand off face, stunning Jenny to her toes. KATE'S GOING RACK! Torrid bid to get after Jmac-jug early...Katie teeth bared, shoulders hunched as she gets up in there hup-hup-hup, shrugging home the short-shot left/right uppercuts. Jenny's melons all a-jostle - Playmate beef getting bunched up...blonde girl going out on her feet, then CLOUTING KATE RIGHTY! Walloping emergency right hand clobbers Beckinsale upside the head...she totters to her right suddenly staring in wonder, stops punching. Jenny rallies off ropes, putting an extra right hand into Kate's jaw...brunette stumbling to her right and forward, hitting ropes as blonde girl shrugs up off the cables, going on the attack! Mac hooking the waist as Kate covers up earmuff...Jenny just working hard, beatin' the gut. Jenny on Katie mayhem...McCArthy hammering away downstairs, then pushing-in, keeping Kate stacked butt-in-ropes. Becks covered up, shuddering with hurt...blonde girl able to punish the lats; beat Kate about the head and shoulders as Becks holds her earmuff together. Jenny big and bangin' to the bell, staying on Kate, working her...she drops her hands to her sides and bellows at cowering Beckinsale, letting Kate know what happened...KATE HOOKS CROTCH! Late, eggregious foul - savage lick to trunks bunches Jenny up; brings the ref in hot - pummeled, seething Kate bodied away by official as Jenny's corner rushes to her aid.

R2: A more mobile, methodical, cautious Kate Becks...opening with the jab; circling to her right. Jenny wincing from low-blow, but resolute in pursuit - dukes at her cheeks as she crouches/bobs forward, looking to work inside Beckinsales jab. Kate using the ring well, showing a springy leg...she's changing her directions well - hooking off the jab to clout Jenny's jugs, then pivoting clockwise around the scores. Midway through, tart one-two punches Jenny's face as she's moving in...blonde girl stutter-stepping on the spot - she's hurt! Kate crouching close, dipping down, hooking the trunks, then disguising it via double-hook to gut...groanin' Jenny gives ground, backing into ropes. From there, methodical breaking-down of Jenny McCarthy...Kate dukes at cheeks, elbows in, dipping side to side as she snap-licks mitts to toned blonde body, bringing fists back to cheeks to reset. Jenny bobbing in crossed-arm, looking bleak and winded...gets worse when a batting, lapping left hook drifts a little low, finding her trunks again late. Jenny's hands flinch down and KATE POURS INTO RACK! Mac's jugs under siege as never before...Becks baring her teeth, eyes blazing as she chop-clouts away right/left...MAC'S BARING HER THROAT! Jenny swooning on the spot, jugs jumpin' under the pumpin' of Kate's rip-roaring assault...curvy-strong legs hold Jenny up against the ropes, but OH the savagery! Kate able to slam away extra until ref pulls her off at bell...McCarthy grimacing, gently hugging well-mugged jugs as she sags into ropes.

R3: Kate pivot-stepping to her right, keeping weight on left (lead) plant-leg while sticking Jenny the long left jab to face. Blonde girl facing into poke - bobbing, but not evading as Kate tracks with heartless accuracy. Counterclockwise poking from Kate picking Jenny apart, turning her midring, then Becks will hook the jugs, pivot-clockwise and reset negotiations. Beckinsale SO focussed: eyes narrowed, lips pressed tight as she methodically sets herself the task of dismantling Jenny. McCarthy crossing arms at chest, bobbing on approach, but not closing...all she's really doing is moving her face into Kate's stinging left hand. Down the stretch, Beckinsale mixing in the short right hand; hooking the left hand in around Jenny's right tricep...classic pick-apart boxing from a British icon as McCarthy can't close. Bell: extra left hook Kate-to-Jenny digs at black trunks...blonde girl crying out, doubling over as corner jumps the apron...ref escorting Kate back to her corner, giving her the finger-waggling of a lifetime.

R4: Jab/right-hand bounces off Jenny's high guard; dip-and-rip left hook bites black trunks, crippling Jenny on the spot. Hook, hook digs at Jenny's sternum...McCarthy: "Uhhh..." face pinched, body cringing forward. Right hand chops in behind blonde left elbow; left uppercut picks up Jenny's overhanging forehead...Kate puttin' 'em together; Jenny munching. Left uppercut to chin straightens JEnny...she reaches a tired right, gets beat to the punch as Kate POUNDS right cross to chin. Wicked side to side head-snap for Jenny...knees buckle, then strong legs hold her up as Mac forms earmuff...Kate moves in with left cradling Jenny 'round the right flank, cuddling her for rich, pumping right hands up into breadbasket. Jenny grunting "Uh...uh...uh..." as she folds forward behind her mitts, held and hit...Kate working gut like a champ, backing blonde butt into ropes. Push on Jenny's guard to stack; hacking, hateful left to trunks to sit Jenny in ropes...Kate reaches in under blonde's limp arms, wrestling apart the guard then JMAC'S RACK GOES ON SALE! Becks grimly at jug - short, hacking right hands and forearms; drifting lefts hands and forearms. Jenny's head lolling, lips parted, lashes all a-flutter...she's reaching around Kate's shoulders, trying to tie up: Becks snarling, bodying up to stack as necessary, breaking all clinches. Never has Kate Beckinsale gone for jug as she's doing here - approaching Brittany Daniel levels of ferocity and efficacy...Jenny Mac paralyzed, gobsmacked, hair in her eyes as Kate takes, takes, takes. Jenny wilting - left arm looped 'round Kate's shoulders...Kate shoving the right forearm into jug - using her left to push Jenny upright in spots and THE REF STEPS IN! TKO4 Kate Beckinsale as Jenny Mac just can't answer!

After: McCarthy woozily berating the ref as he's cradling her to safety...Beckinsale brightening, hopping happy as an ingenue to her corner for hugs. Bunny charm bracelet brought out under glass by officials - a fresh bunny icon added to the claims thereon...glorious times for Kate Beckinsale as she stops her nemesis. And then, glancing over into the McCarthy corner, Kate sees it: Jenny - battered to be sure, well-beaten tonight, but...smiling wearily as she chats with her people - apparently unbroken.

It's too much for Kate Becks. Face darkening into thundercloud frown, she storms over to still-woozy Jenny, grabs her by the arm, yanks her at the stumble back to Beckinsale corner. Jenny jammed chest-first into corner, then punched a vicious, downward-spearing right hand that thump-skids across kidney and follows-through past Jenny's left hip. Blonde girl crying out, eyes shut tight...paralyzing shot allows Kate to lift Jenny's left leg and prop it in ropes.

Jenny: stunned, bleary-eyed, confused...she mumbles "Wha'...?" with damp blonde hair across her eyes as she hugs the turnbuckle, her body bracing for the worst.

Kate: snarling, left hand braced on Jen's raised left thigh...brunette leans in, putting her back behind a pounding right to kidney, earning herself a hefty fine with the act. Jenny moans, captive, shaking her head "NO!" She sights on Carrie Prejean in the audience; mouths the words "HELP ME!" Carrie gulps, looking at the ground...she wants no part of Kate Beckinsale enraged.

Oh. The. Pounding. Officials dithering over rule-books and procedural manuals...meanwhile Katie going to town - laying in the right hands to Jen's forty-year-old lower back, then straightening up to pop hips-right into hooks...bare knucks sounding out PIK! PIK! PAK! on Jenny's taut beef.

Knees follow - Kate lifting her right knee up into the hamstring of that suspended left leg of Jenny's - Kate tossing her head back as she hoists home - left hand on Jenny's raised left knee; right hand on Jenny's right hip. Hammie's destroyed, Kate begins lifting knees to helpless McCarthy glutes...world-class buns jumpin' and shuddering as Kate pumps-in.

Shrieking, Kate clasps hands and brings the axehandle down onto Jenny's raised left quad. Blonde girl moans in pain, lifting her head to bawl in protest.

Panting, Kate leans in right shoulder/forearm to brace close against Jenny's back, all the better to deliver chopping left hands to that raised left quad - hammerfist delivery, but landing with knuckles flat on meat. PIK! PIK! PIK!

Jenny: eyes shut tight, mouth wide open...she's in shock...coming close to being utterly destroyed by a Kate Beckinsale driven mindless by hate.

Suddenly, a little blonde in the shape of Hayden Panettiere of all people, THAT'S who slides in under bottom rope, then rushes at Beckinsale, pouring a running forearm across Kate's back while shouting "STOP! KATE STOP!"

Becks turns, glaring down...she palms Hayden's face, pushes her off...Panny stumbles back several feet before falling to her glutes midring. Kate turns attention back to Jenny, left hand on raised left leg to anchor thrusting right forearms against that tender lower back.

Hayden rallies, scrambling up, charging back in...Kate hears her, turns, lifts her bare foot and runs Hayden into a shocking big-boot to chest, slamming tiny blonde girl to her back. Hayden stunned, hugging her body, rolling onto her face...Kate marauding now - two blondes down...she flicks hair behind her ears, starts stomping Hayden's buns and hammies!

That's too much...officials shamed by Hayden's forlorn-hope charge - they FINALLY move to restrain Beckinsale as she's crowding in close on Jenny's back - Kate placing the hard, sleek plank of her right thigh across Jenny's lower back again and again - chin out over Jenny's left shoulder, grunting in Jmac's ear. Becks pulled off...poor Jenny deadweight, hung-up in ropes...she's a shellshocked beauty THROBBING from too much Kate Becks tonight.