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23 July 2012 Lacey Chabert vs Scarlett Johansson

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 8 months ago

Lacey Chabert 8.jpg Scarlett Johansson 14.jpg

Posted by simguy on July 23, 2012, 3:27 pm

BEFORE: "Who knows what her problem is," Scarlett shrugs when asked to assess Chabert's animus towards her. "She wouldn't be the first aging, out of work wannabe in hollywood to hate and resent girls who have made it big. She's probably pissed at the attention Jen got in her rousing best of 7 against Lishy, and she's desperate to get a little spotlight back. And I imagine the fact that several of her own moneymen have made no secret of the fact that they prefer my in-ring charms to hers must scald like hell, so...guess it's not all that hard to understand why she's so in-my-face these days."

Chabert fuming - constantly foiled by security when she tries to body-up on Johannson...she's a woman on a mission at podium. "All you have to do is listen to this woman talk for about ten seconds to know why I want to turn her lights out!" Lacey glares. "But more than that, I just think Scarlett is way, way over-rated. She's not JKO material - she could never start for us, so yes, I do resent the licensing fees she extorts out of our mgmt group from time to time. You'll see: Scarlett Johannson can't take big time pressure, and that's what I'm all about in the ring. I'm a little bulldozer and Scarlett's the dirt and crap and junk you usually see getting bulldozed...get me?"

Scarlett in charcoal bra style diving bikini cut to mirror the Andress Dr. No iconic bikini; small black gloves; shoulder length blonde hair loose. Lacey in yellow bikini; small black gloves; dark hair in loose curls.

During R1: Lacey boldly walking to Scarlett all jugs a-jumpin', stepping in to jam a tuff right hand to the Johannson tummy, paying for it as southpaw Scarlett nudges right jab to left breast, sidestepping around Lacey's left flank. Lacey turns, angrily clouting her right hand wide against Scarlett's rack: Johannson frowning, but disciplined, once again issues the right-hand check-jab to Lacey-jug, pivoting smartly counterclockwise. Chabert baring teeth, whirling again on the spot and smoking Scarlett a wide right roundhouse to rack...Johannson pursing her lips, wincing, but firing back a straight right/left in combination to Chabert's heaving bosom. This time Scarlett stays in forward-lean, weight on lead (right) leg, elbows in...Lacey's angry right hand wraps around Scarlett's left shoulder, allowing blonde-girl to answer a tidy right uppercut/slap-chop short left to jugs, finally backing Lacey off. Scarlett hops-to, leaning in with face close to Lacey's left shoulder, carrying the short left hand flat to rack, then crowding, forcing Lacey to back away for punching room. Scarlett tries to hop close for the same move: Lacey walks blonde chin onto stubby left uppercut even as Johannson's looking to jam her left hand into Chabert-jug. Leads to free-for-all slugging at close range as Scarlett squares up out of southpaw posture...girls hustling and grunting, teeth bared as they let hands go to quivering tummies, shuddering racks, beautiful faces. No quarter asked or given - girls slugging busily away at one another toe-to-toe, with Lacey able to edge Scarlett in both volume and weight of shot by the bell. Johannson cautioned at the break not to "wallow in the muck" with Lacey...blazing-eyed blonde doesn't seem to be enjoying the recommendation.

R2: Scarlett hopping out in southpaw stance - right foot and shoulder forward, always seeking to keep right foot outside of Lacey's lead (left) foot. Scarlett's fists shoulder high, closely grouped either side of chin, elbows in...she's slap-chopping out and down with the right jab, nagging Lacey's left breast - always looking to set up sneaky, straight-jotting lefts to chin. All Lacey early though...she's throwing her body into wide-sweeping right hands ticketed for Scarlett's chest...even when Johannson can parry with her left shoulder, the punches carry weight enough to belt blonde-girl out of her stance. Lacey's left hooks to the head less productive as Scarlett slips underneath/pivots-right to turn her brunette - but sheer ferocity of Chabert enough to keep Scarlett turning. Down the stretch, Scarlett turns her left shoulder in to receive Lacey's smacking right; answers back the quick-clipping right uppercut to chin, and, as Lacey's backpedaling...Scarlett lunges forward to place straight left bingo onna mouth. Head-snap Lacey...she totters back into ropes all jugs a-jumpin', visibly gobsmacked...Scarlett hops-to, puts her back into a short piledriver of a straight left to rack; switches shoulders-left to pull a tidy right hook across jug and POOR LACEY'S SAGGING INTO ROPES! Chabert wincing in pain at the pinpoint rack attack, bringing mitts to guard her jugs...Scarlett leans in close-by Lacey's left shoulder, caring left hand deep to tummy, doubling Lacey forward and ejecting her mouthpiece "POO-H!" off her teeth at bell. Lacey sitting with left hip on ropes, left arm over top rope, right hand wedged against her crotch as she bleats to ref about a supposed "Low blow!" Scarlett prancing away without a backward glance, refusing to even argue the point.

R3: Masterful stuff from Scarlett midring...she'll ping the right jab, then bring a swift straight left chaser down the pike, bobbing torso-left to duck Lacey's sweeping right; bobbing again to duck the left and pivoting-right to turn Chabert's left flank. Lacey huffing and puffing with anger, throwing too wide, too hard...easy reads for clever Scarlett as she nibbles jug, bobs and pivots to safety. Down the stretch, frustrated Lacey shoots close to reach in under Scarlett's arms, bodying blonde girl rough to ropes...leads to slugging from the wrap as Lacey keeps left arm in under the Johannson right while plowing Scarlett's tummy the free right mitt. Johannson able to tie up, hold for ref's break...too little too late for aggressive Chabert to steal the round.

R4: Scarlett being cute, Lacey being rough...brunette willing to miss haymakers just to keep Johannson tentative. Chabert having more success bull-rushing Scarlett - bodying blonde into ropes - pounding her from the wrap, or mauling her until ref's breaks. Scarlett disheveled, hair in her eyes, looking a little frazzled...Lacey's a jiggling little terror in close - employing forearms against jugs, holding and hitting - curvy legs and backside all a-jostle with the effort of keeping Scarlett pinned ropeside. Sloppy stuff, but effective for Lacey...she pushes up off her foe at bell, licking her lips, grinning at her trainer en route to corner. Scarlett flops down on her stool in a huff, scowling and fretting.

R5: Lacey slops the hurt to Scarlett again - slugging her out of her stance midring with those wide right haymakers to rack, then bodying her to ropes for tummy-on-tummy mayhem. Chabert reaching past Scarlett to hold the ropes (illegal) Chabert holding and hitting (illegal) jamming forearms to jug when there's no room for proper slugging (illegal) and making a nuisance of herself in general. Scarlett baring teeth with the effort of trying to bodily heave Lacey to the side, but little brunette too solid, too good at wriggling for position int he clinch...time and time again Lacey wrestles Scarlett to a slumped position deep in ropes, the better to beat upon her. Final moments - Scarlett in a bad way: she's doubled over; left hip in ropes; hands covering her face as Lacey crowds close on blonde right flank - left forearm riding Scarlett's back while right hand slugs up underneath, hoping for face, more than happy to claim jug if necessary. Bell: Lacey continues to lean-on and slug...poor Scarlett grimacing all eyes shut, lips parted until ref pulls Chabert off.

R6: Scarlett achy-painy off her stool, looking a little ragged...slow start allows Lacey to hurtle across and tackle startled blonde girl into ropes! Johannson shimmying herself to her right along ropes, pancaked by Lacey...little brunette reaching under blonde arms, top of head in blonde jugs as wailing hup-hup bombardment works Scarlett's tummy right/left/right. Johannson reaching under, trying to lift-and-heave, but Chabert writhing, getting her arms back in under, driving Scarlett's back deep into ropes for more push-and-plunder. Right hand clout takes Scarlett heavily across jug; swinging left clocks across her mouth...she's taking brutal fire here, trying to cover up, only to be wrestled wide-open again. Lacey SO energetic - dense, dark-tanned curves jiggling with enthusiasm - tight buns shuddering side to side as she plants curvy legs to push and slug. Scarlett wearing down, once again pushed so her left hips riding ropes...she doubles forward, covers her face as Lacey lays in close on blonde right side, sliding left arm across Scarlett's lower back to hold her close. Lacey swinging right hands up underneath - beating at Scarlett's guard in hopes of finding chin; claing heavily against rack if Johannson's willing to sacrifice it. Scarlett shabby, creeping forward along the ropes while bearing Lacey's weight...Chabert in snug, holding and hitting, just handing out the beating of a lifetime. Ref finally moves in to break 'em up: Scarlett ashen faced, sleepy, mouth open...Lacey quivering with aggression, eyes blazing, pushing at ref to get back on. Exhausted Scarlett cries out "G-UHH!" as Lacey shoots in on waist, her left shoulder pushing deep to Johannson-gut - Scarlett's hands on Lacey's back as blonde girl's head whipsaw-lolls back and forth. Lacey squirming for position, working the gut via short, plugging hup-hup-hup lefts and rights...groaning Scarlett turns to her right, right hip in ropes, covering up and bending forward MISERABLE with punishment. TOO MUCH LACEY! Chabert roping her right arm across Scarlett's lower back to hold her close, feeding her swinging left hands jug-jug-jug-CHIN! Johannson loosening horribly as Lacey's starting to land flush. More jug; more face - Lacey holding and hitting, working Scarlett, pushing in on her, beating her without mercy and SCARLETT GOES DOWN! Johannson's legs giving way suddenly, dropping her belly down on canvas, elbows beneath her, face buried in her gloves. Lacey "wuh-HOO! wuh-HOO!" as she leaps away all jugs a-jostlin'. IT'S OVER! Scarlett lying still, giving it up on her tummy...it's KO6 Chabert as the crowd goes wild.

After: Scarlett bogged down, roughed up and finally overwhelmed...Lacey taking a page out of Jenny Love-Hewitt's Scarlett-busting playbook to use Johannson up. Jen milling in the background, glancing over as Scarlett's slowly brought round while beamin' Lacey fronts for cameras. "So much for sneaky Scarlett's southpaw smooth," Chabert cackles with delight. "You know the best weapon to use against a southpaw? BEEF! Put a tummy on it! Crowd her; bully her! We at JKO know how to fight Scarlett Johannson, baby. You don't play pattycake with the kid: YOU TAKE HER INTO THE ROPES AND BEAT HER SLEEPY!" HBO ops van slapping the Swan Lake tape into place pronto...Scarlett's awake on her stool...sharks are circling...you never can tell when the JKO girls might dip in for a little extra