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12 August 2012 Pink vs Lady Gaga

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 7 months ago

Lady Gaga 02.jpg

("An Empire State of Mind at the Asylum" PPV)

(Site: Asylum Arena, Philadelphia, Pennyslvania)

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on August 12, 2012, 8:26 pm

BEFORE:

"I'm kind of surprised Pink picked ME for the last fight in her campaign against singers," says a smiling Gaga. "Guess she doesn't want to end it with a win."

"Gaga's 2-0 against Front Street," says Pink with just a hint of a smile. "Well. You know what they say, Lady G. Two out of three ain't bad."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Back at ringside as 'Edge Of Glory' booms through the arena, and here comes 'The Fame Monster' herself, Lady Gaga...being carried to the ring on a lounge by six very large, very well muscled young men!"

McCarthy: "Ridiculous! This is a boxing card not a an orgy in Cleopatra's court! Who ever heard of being CARRIED to the ring?"

Tess: "At your age, Mac, you might want to look into hiring a few bearers of your own..."

McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "Saw THAT one coming all the way from Wyomissing. And, as our audience becomes more inebriated, Gaga into the ring and helped off with the robe to reveal a leopard print number that leaves little to the imagination..."

McCarthy: "And you'd think people would have imagined the parts we SEE looking a lot better..."

Tess(chuckling): "That was pretty good, Mac. Keep hanging around with me. You're learning..."

McCarthy: "Hanging around with...LEARNING???"

O'Dell: "Aaaannndddd, that's 'Trouble' booming through the arena, and here comes 'The Queen', Pink!"

McCarthy: "The Queen of The Weirdo's Double-Wide Brothel..."

Tess: "Let me check something here...yep. I think Mac's just set her personal best for witty quips on one card..."

McCarthy: "I'm going to break more than a record in about THREE SECONDS..."

O'Dell: "Pink into the ring, helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that black bikini with the white skulls on it, and we're about ready. Tess, of course, has already made her pick, making Pink the favorite. What's your take, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Pink's nothing special. She's been ducking me for YEARS. But, she's better than Gaga, so I'll go with her if I have to make a pick."

O'Dell: "Our ladies are in agreement. Let's see if they're right. There's the bell. Pink working forward, likes to work out of that crouch some, and she's doing it here. Gaga giving ground, moving and jabbing, not anxious to mix it up."

McCarthy: "Good strategy by Gaga. She's not going to win slugging with Pink. She needs to box her for points."

O'Dell: "Not having much success scoring right now, though. Pink pressuring, forcing Gaga backward. Lady G fighting off the back foot, nothing behind the jabs she's flicking at Pink."

Tess: "Pink having much more success. She's got the left hand working. Landing the odd right. Scoring well. Moving well. Definitely in charge."

O'Dell: "Gaga content to circle back and jab. Pink cutting the ring off now and going body. Gaga flurries back...AND PINK ROCKS HER WITH A RIGHT-LEFT! Gaga covering up along the ropes as Pink digs to the ribs, bangs shots off The Fame Monster's guard, hooks behind the gloves to the head."

McCarthy: "Gaga does NOT want to be on the ropes."

O'Dell: "And that's right where Pink has her, banging away."

McCarthy: "Gaga moving the head and shoulders, defending well. Denying Pink the target."

O'Del: "And she's able to avoid the big shot to the bell!"

McCarthy: "Pink's round, but Gaga slick in defense, survives to fight into the second."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second round underway and Pink back to the pressure. Gaga circles backward and Pink gives chase. Lady G still off the back foot, flicking powder puff jabs as Pink works forward."

McCarthy: "Gaga actually circling left, unusual against a fighter who fights right handed, because you want to circle AWAY front power, but Gaga knows Pink's a natural lefty. She usually fights orthodox, though she'll switch to southpaw occasionally, but that left hook is the punch you need to be careful of."

O'Dell: "Pink continuing to stalk. Able to score in ones and twos, but Gaga isn't hanging around for any flurries. Not going to trade. Constantly on the move."

Tess: "Pink patient. Not pressing. Continuing to stalk. Looking to cut the ring off."

O'Dell: "Gets that done and goes hook to the ribs. Gaga backed up into the ropes..."

McCarthy: "Left uppercut rang Lady G's bell!"

O'Dell: "Pink split the guard with it and Gaga's hurt! Pink all in along the ropes, hammering away! Gaga covering up in a tight guard. PINK A BIG RIGHT HAND! GAGA WOBBLED...

Tess: "Referee not going to let this go on much longer...."

O'Dell: "And there's the bell!"

McCarthy: "Another 15 seconds and HBO would definitely be thinking about filler..."

Tess: "Card says 20-18, Pink, but if this keeps up, we're not going to need them."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Into the third round now, and we see the template established. Pink in pursuit, Gaga the quarry."

Tess: "Lady G seems to have her legs back. Moving well. Making Pink work to find her. Always circling. Mac, explain to the fans why a fighter circles rather than backs away."

McCarthy: "All about angles, Tess. You back straight up, you're still right in front of your opponent, which is where you DON'T want to be, or you wouldn't be backing up in the first place. You create space, but that's it. Circle away and you create space and change angles."

O'Dell: "And that's exactly what Gaga's doing. Not allowing Pink to close or cut the ring off. Pink staying patient. In total control. Scoring in ones and twos. But racking up plenty of points."

McCarthy: "Gaga landing off the back foot, committed to movement. Not going to engage."

Tess: "What's the endgame for Gaga here, Mac? She's losing her third straight round, basically just running..."

McCarthy: "Well, obviously I don't know what the Empire game plan is, but what I suspect is that Gaga wants to make Pink work, use energy. Lady G has to figure that she'll slow down as the fight goes on, and, when that happens, Gaga can start boxing for points and win this thing on the cards."

O'Dell: "Well, if she's going to do that, she'll have to do it from behind. There's the bell ending the third, and, there's no question that Pink now has a 30-27 lead."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Fourth round underway now, and Gaga back on her bike. Pink in pursuit as she has been the entire fight so far, but Gaga not going to be easily brought to battle."

McCarthy: "A little frustration showing on Pink's face here. She's having to work hard in pursuit. Gaga very elusive. Flicking that jab, circling, reversing, showing angles, not giving Pink a chance to put anything together."

O'Dell: "Again, though, Pink scoring with ones and twos. Landing jabs, hooking with the right hand, then continuing the pursuit."

Tess: "The key here for Pink would seem to be not to change anything. Just keep working. She's in total control again this round. She's racking up points. She'll have a big lead when this one is over..."

McCarthy: "Sometimes easier said than done. You want to take her out of there, and sometimes you start pressing. And, you're actually RIGHT, Walmart. That's exactly what Pink doesn't want to do."

O'Dell: "Waning seconds of round four. Gaga circling away. Pink working to cut the ring. And there's the bell, and, as you said, Tess, Pink adds to the lead, now up 40-36 on every card in the building."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Into the fifth now, and Pink again stalking Lady Gaga. Gaga cute with the footwork. Slick with the left hand, popping it in Pink's face as she circles away from the left hand..."

McCarthy: "Nothing behind it, off the back foot, but designed to slow Pink's pursuit."

O'Dell: "Not really having that effect, though. Pink just walking through it, using the long, straight left to score. Hooking with the right hand. Stalking, but not chasing. Looking to cut the ring."

Tess: "Crowd getting a little restless here with Gaga's reluctance to engage. Smattering of boos."

McCarthy: "The fans are absolutely out of line on this one. Gaga's not standing and slugging with Pink because that's not the best way for her to win the fight. She's fighting smart."

O'Dell: "And so is Pink. The Front Street fighter not getting sloppy. Staying with her own plan. Working to cut the ring. Scoring points...LEFT HOOK! LEFT HOOK!"

McCarthy: "That's the one I told you about!"

O'Dell: "Gaga staggered. Covering up now. Pink going to work with both hands, banging away lusty. Gaga in deep trouble, hanging on..."

McCarthy: "Pink ALL OVER her. Referee looking VERY closely..."

O'Dell: "Pink a nasty right hand...and there's the bell!"

Tess: "Three times now Pink's run out of time."

McCarthy: "But, on the scorecards, it's Gaga who's running out of time, down 50-45 through five."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "Underway in the sixth and Pink looking to finish now, going straight AT Gaga, but Lady G again has the legs back, lands a nice combination...another...Pink walking right through the punches, but Gaga powdering her face again!"

McCarthy: "This is the endgame, Walmart. Pink frustrated trying to finish, getting tired of chasing, and now she's getting sloppy. And Gaga scoring in combination."

O'Dell: "Gaga not hurting Pink, still fighting mostly off the back foot, but, for the first time The Fame Monster scoring. Putting punches together."

Tess: "Pink actually smiling and shaking her head after that last flurry. Might just be her way of tipping the cap to Gaga."

O'Dell: "Gaga bouncing now, snapping the jab instead of flicking it. Pink working a little body when she gets in range, but Lady G quickly gone behind another flurry. Pink continuing to pressure, but it's Gaga with the rhythm now, putting punches together and making her opponent chase. There's the bell ending the sixth, and Gaga's on the board, ladies."

McCarthy: "Give her credit. She's sticking with her plan, and the fight just may have started turning in her direction."

Tess: "She's got a long way to come back, though, down 59-55 after six."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "We are into round seven now and Pink just walking forward, a little reckless here, clearly looking to do what the bell stopped her from doing three times tonight. And Gaga taking full advantage, again landing combinations, powdering Pink's face, mostly off the back foot. Not hurting the bigger girl, but scoring, then scooting away before Pinkness can respond."

Tess: "Not sure why Pink doesn't just get back to what won her the first five rounds..."

McCarthy: "Like I said, Walmart, easier said than done. Fighters are aggressive by nature. That's why we fight. Pink wants to take the fight to Gaga, not go on 'Dancing With The Stars' with her..."

O'Dell: "Gaga, on the other hand, looks like winning that mirror ball. She's playing matador to Pink's bull and having quite a bit of success with it. Gaga landing punches in bunches, then slipping away from any counter attack attempts from Pink."

McCarthy: "Gaga impressing me quite a bit right now. She's done a lot of brawling in some of her fights, but she can box, and she's showing that as the seventh winds down. Frustrating Pink. Shutting her down and shutting her out."

O'Dell: "And there's the bell. The seventh has come to an end, and Gaga threatening to get back in this fight, Tess."

Tess: "It's 68-65 now with three to go. Still some mountain to climb for Lady G, but she's at least at base camp."

McCarthy: "'SpaceCamp'? What does THAT bomb have to do with anything?"

Tess: "Not 'Space...' Never mind..."

McCarthy: "Stop babbling, Walmart..."

Tess: "If I keep working with you, I might start babbling on a permanent basis..."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "We're into round eight, and I wouldn't have bet on us getting this far after those first couple of rounds..."

McCarthy: "I wasn't much of a believer in Gaga, but she's shown me something tonight."

O'Dell: "One thing she's showing EVERYone is that she's in great shape. Eight rounds in and she's right back on her bicycle, sticking and moving. Pink no longer charging the cape, though. Back to a slow, steady stalk."

Tess: "Jewel and Neve had to be in her ear in the corner about this. She's got the lead. She's in control. Just get back to the game plan..."

McCarthy: "What would THOSE two know about boxing..."

Tess: "Says the woman with ZERO training wins..."

McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "Are you sure you aren't taking payola from Jack Daniels, Mac? Meanwhile, for those still conscious, Pink continuing to stalk Gaga. Got her on her back foot again. Landing in ones and twos. Working to cut off the ring. Showing that discipline that was missing the last couple of rounds."

McCarthy: "She still wants the KO, though. You can see it in the body language."

O'Dell: "No question about it, but Gaga remains elusive. Circling away and jabbing off the back foot. Pink content to pursue, score, reset, pursue and score again as Gaga circles to the bell."

Tess: "78-74 now with two to go. Going to take something big from Gaga at this point."

ROUND NINE:

O'Dell: "Round nine begins and Gaga landing a nice flurry. Surprised Pink a little with a quick jab step and shoe shine!"

McCarthy: "I'm going to say it again. I'm impressed by Gaga here. She's showing me more boxing skill than I thought she had."

O'Dell: "Being a little more aggressive this round. Not much to lose if my colleagues' cards are correct, and I suspect Gaga's corner's working off similar math. Pink working forward behind the left jab, trying to cut the ring, but Gaga reversing motion, stopping, popping, gone."

Tess: "You've got to be impressed with Lady G's conditioning. Ninth round and she's bouncing around out there like this thing just started."

O'Dell: "Hands haven't slowed, either. She's getting off as well now as she has the entire fight. Not hurting Pink, but powdering her face with leather. Pink still only able to land ones and twos."

McCarthy: "Gaga's stealing this round with slickness. Being VERY elusive and countering very well."

O'Dell: "Lady G boxing and dancing to the bell. Clearly pleased with herself on her way back to the corner and she should be. That was her best round of the night."

Tess: "Probably too little, too late on the scorecard, though. Still 87-84, with one round left."

ROUND TEN:

O'Dell: "Into the tenth and final scheduled round, and Gaga again aggressive off the bell, landing a nice flurry, and Pink firing right back. There was a solid right in there from Pinkness. Gaga disengages quickly and circles, making Pink pursue again."

McCarthy: "Gaga looking for something big here, but she can't stand in front of Pink. No percentage in that..."

O'Dell: "Instead Lady G exchanging in spots. Stopping, getting off, and getting back on her bike."

Tess: "And Pink plenty happy to trade when Gaga's willing. Pinkness getting the better of those flurries. Overpowering Gaga. But, as soon as that happens, Lady G's gone."

O'Dell: "Gaga using those legs. Again the crowd getting restless with her tactics, but I'm with Mac. Gaga has no business standing and slugging with Pink. And she's not going to. She's picking her spots. Hoping to catch lightning in a bottle, but the clock is not her friend. Pink continuing to pursue, landing those ones and twos. Scoring points."

McCarthy: "Gaga another combination, answered by Pink."

O'Dell: And Gaga back to legging away. And there's the bell."

Tess: "No hug, Mac, but a touching of gloves. Show of mutual respect."

McCarthy: "Gaga earned some respect tonight. But, she didn't earn the decision."

O'Dell: "And the judges agree with you, Mac. With that last one going to Pink, decision no surprise, coming back 97-93 for your winner by UD10, Pink!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I'm with our winner, and, Pinkness, your campaign against the singers has come to a successful conclusion..."

Pink(smiling): "Looks that way. Give Gaga credit. She's game. She's slick. She's quick. She's smart in there. She wasn't gonna mix it up with me. Not after I caught her a couple of times early. She knew if she did that it was gonna be a short night..."

Tess: "Seems like you got frustrated by her tactics after awhile..."

Pink: "Well, I had her almost shut off a couple of times, so I kind of got sloppy trying to finish. But, I'm not trying to give away a bunch of rounds chasing her a**. She wants to try to go ten, we can do that, too, and I'll still get the win."