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31 October 2012 Joanna Garcia vs Pink

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 5 months ago

Joanna Garcia 01.jpg Pink 02.jpg

"WITCHES, PUMPKINHEADS AND BKACK CATS AT THE ASYLUM" PPV

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on October 31, 2012, 9:18 pm

BEFORE:

O'Dell: "Cameras again panning the crowd, and there's the Foxfire delegation in their box, led, of course, by new general manager Jennifer Garner. The entire stable is in attendance, of course...including flyweight champion Sarah Carter and lightweight champion Rachel Nichols..."

McCarthy: "AND the BEST flyweight in the FCBA, Hayden Panettiere!"

Tess: "I wouldn't GO there, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Well she IS, and if you think I'm afraid of Scabbo, think again!"

"Dominique, nique
Nique, s'en allait tout simplement
Routier pauvre et chantant
Et tous chemins et tous lieux
I'll ne parle que du bon Dieu
I'll ne parle que du bon Dieu..."

McCarthy: "What on earth is THAT mess?"

O'Dell: "That would be 'Dominique' by The Singing Nun..."

McCarthy: "Sally Field?"

O'Dell: "No, she was the FLYING Nun..."

McCarthy: "I actually considered DRESSING as a nun for tonight's show, but..."

Tess: "You were afraid to BURST INTO FLAME???"

McCarthy: "Shut it, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "Drink up, boys!"

Tess: "'Dominique', by the way, was performed by Belgian nun Jeanine Deckers, also known as Soeur Sourire, or Sister Smile, and was about Saint Dominic, a Spanish-born priest and founder of the Dominican Order, of which Deckers was a member. It hit number one in both the U.S. and Canada. It was the second-to-last number one hit before the British Invasion, and was only the second foreign-language song ever to hit the top of the charts in the U.S. The first was 'Sukiyaki' by Kyu Sakamoto. Tragically, Deckers committed suicide in March, 1985, due to financial and tax difficulties resulting from the sales of 'Dominique', and in August of that same year, Sakamoto was among those killed in one of the worst air disasters of all time, the crash of Japanese Airlines Flight 123."

O'Dell: "You ARE a walking music encyclopedia!"

McCarthy: "A-HEM, and, walking to the ring, dressed in a New York Yankees uniform complete with Derek Jeter mask is, presumably, our next competitor. Into the ring and helped off with the costume and mask..."

O'Dell: "And quite fitting that she's dressed as a YANKEE, Because that's the wife of Yankee Nick Swisher, the lovely Joanna Garcia rocking a yellow bikini!"

Tess: "Garcia also making her FCBA debut tonight, and I'm sensing a pattern in the Front Street opponents just like the one I've already identified in the SONGS..."

McCarthy: "The only pattern in the songs is how BAD they are..."

Tess: "SCARY bad, you might say..."

"Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
Gonna grab some afternoon delight
My motto's always been, when it's right it's right
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night..."

McCarthy: "I may be SICK..."

Tess: "That, of course, is 'Afternoon Delight', the 1976 chart topper by The Starland Vocal Band, the group which won the Best New Artist Grammy in 1977, and was generally regarded as the worst-ever recipient of that award until Milli Vanilli won it in 1990, then had the award revoked when it was revealed that they weren't actually singing any of the songs. The Starland Vocal Band, by the way, actually hosted a six-week variety show on CBS in 1977. One of the writers and regulars on the show was David Letterman..."

McCarthy: "Will you stop BABBLING, Walmart! Check out the get up the girl climbing into the ring is wearing...kilt, bagpipes, mask...a Scottish Highlander, no doubt"

Tess: "I DO believe she's dressed as Poindexter Del Crunchy!!"

O'Dell: "Helped off with the garb and mask by Jewel and Neve and that would be 'The Queen' of Front Street, Pink!"

Tess: "Wearing her usual black bikini with the white skulls, quite appropriate for Halloween."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Ladies getting ready to go, so let's get our picks. Tess?"

Tess: "Well, if Garcia can hit like her husband, Pink could have real problems. Seriously, though, unlike our last fight, it's the Front Streeter who has the experience advantage in this one. Pink's also more athletic and has more power, so you've got to go with Pink."

O'Dell: "Mac?"

McCarthy: "Pink's average at best. She ducked ME for years. But, Garcia's breaking a maiden tonight, so you HAVE to favor Pink."

O'Dell: "And here we go. Pink in her usual stalking mode, moving forward, bobbing the head. Not doing much with the hands. Garcia snapping out a left jab. Landing it here and there. Circling. Looking to maintain distance. Joanna showing good hand speed, nice feet. Using the left hand to score points, fitting in a right."

McCarthy: "Thought she might go all 'January Jones' here and go all in to try to take Pink out quickly, but she's not pressing. Just boxing professionally."

O'Dell: "Pink not doing much. Just feeling Garcia out here."

Tess: "Is that a good strategy for Pink, Mac?"

McCarthy: "In this case, Walmart, I'm not sure it is. If you've got a couple of top ten fighters in the ring, you see this kind of thing early on, both girls trying to figure the other one out. But, when you're a solid favorite like Pink, there's a school of thought that you go right after the other girl. Don't let her hang around and gain confidence."

Tess: "Pink has a tendancy to start slowly in fights. She's the type of fighter who LIKES to feel out opponents..."

McCarthy: "Nothing wrong with that...except if you do it too often. Because then you become like the hitter who rarely swings at the first pitch. You're GOING to get a fastball down the middle and end up in the hole 0-1."

O'Dell: "Joanna not throwing a lot of fastballs. Instead it's a steady diet of junk, but it's having the desired effect. Garcia scoring to the bell, and she's got Pink in the hole 0-1."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second round underway, and Pink a lot busier from the outset. Landing some good, solid combinations and backing Garcia up. Joanna forced immediately to the defensive, trying to jab and circle, but Pink squaring her up with some solid shot."

McCarthy: "Joanna doesn't want to trade. She needs to box this girl for points. Trading is going to result in counting lights."

O'Dell: "Pink VERY efficient right now, Mac. Using a nice, quick left jab to locate, then fitting the rights."

Tess: "This is where Pink's athleticism shows up. Look at the footwork. Garcia's moving, trying to stay out of Pink's crosshairs, but Pink is so quick and light on the feet she's getting to the spots, squaring Joanna up repeatedly."

O'Dell: "Garcia not getting much done at the moment. In retreat, covering, trying to pick off punches and counter, but Pink in total control down the stretch, lands a nice flurry at the bell to cap off a dominant round."

Tess: "That 0-1 hole vanished pretty quickly. 19-19 through two."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "We're back to action in the third, and Pink is back in control. Again range finding with that sharp left, fitting rights, squaring Joanna up and BACKING her up."

McCarthy: "Garcia needs to find some space and counter. Got to slow this down. It's not just one big shot she has to worry about. A few rounds of what Pink's dishing out right now are going to have the same effect."

O'Dell: "Garcia slipping and sliding, hooking back body. Pink working some downstairs now as well. Lots of volume from the Front Streeter and not many of those shells are duds...and even fewer are off target. Garcia with a flurry there! No quit in Joanna, even as Pink continues to have the better of things."

McCarthy: "Garcia isn't here to run or quit. Give her credit. She's here to WIN."

Tess: "And she can DO that without actually winning, can't she, Mac?"

McCarthy: "If you take the long view, she certainly can. She's in her debut tonight. She's very pretty and has a great interview presence. She can maybe get more fights for herself by showing people something tonight."

O'Dell: "Pink STICKING that jab, bangs a right hook to the ribs. Garcia counters with a sharp left, and Pink to the belly with a hook at the bell. Plenty of compete out of Joanna, but Pink's in the lead."

Tess: "29-28 through three."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Into the fourth now, and Pink turning up the pressure! Backs Garcia up with a solid left-right to the head, digs a hook to the breadbasket..."

McCarthy: "THAT was a NASTY punch! That HURT Garcia!"

Tess: "Shovel hook. Wonder who taught her THAT?"

McCarthy: "Shut it, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "Drink up, boys, as Joanna drinks up the punishment. Garcia backed up with another solid right! That one wobbled her!"

McCarthy: "Pink staying patient. Working the left, setting up the right hand. Looking for the finisher, but not pressing."

O'Dell: "There's a HARD left-right! Garcia backed into the ropes. Knees did a shimmy. Pink going body now, trying to bring the guard down. Working in tight..."

McCarthy: "RIGHT HOOK, JOANNA!"

O'Dell: "Garcia ROCKS Pink with a short right hook that landed right on the button! No idea how Pink is still standing! Garcia going all in now, ripping punches with both hands, driving Pink backward in her wake. Now it's Pink backed into the ropes, and Joanna teeing off!"

McCarthy: "Pink covering up. Garcia trying to end this thing right now!"

O'Dell: "Joanna a hard right hand, digs a left to the ribs, back up top with a right hook. Garcia all OVER Pink at the bell!"

McCarthy: "The kid stole the round. Perfectly placed that right hook. Eight out of ten bantams are DOWN with that shot, and most of them aren't getting back up!"

Tess: "Pink didn't go down, but she DID lose the round, and Garcia has evened the cards at 38."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Ready to go for the fifth now, and Pink still looking a bit unsteady. Garcia to work with the left jab. Pink short with a return hook. Garcia moving better than Pink right now..."

McCarthy: "Pink doesn't have her legs back yet..."

O'Dell: "And Garcia's figured it out! And she ROCKS Pink with a BIG flurry. Garcia's got the singer wobbled again. And again she's letting the hands go!"

McCarthy: "This kid wants to FINISH here."

O'Dell: "Garcia thinks she can win the war right here, and she's putting all her troops into the battle! BANGING home lefts and rights as Pink covers up! Garcia really getting off heavy..."

Tess: "Not sure how Pink is soaking all this up, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Testament to how tough and physical she is. Like I said, most bantams could not absorb this much punishment."

O'Dell: "Got to wonder how much more of this water she can ship without going under. Garcia doing everything she can to send her to the bottom. Pink rocked with another right hook. Garcia jabbing the head back. Pink ducks an overhand right, clinches. Referee orders a break. Garcia right back to work, but there's the bell! End of the fifth. Pink still afloat but her decks awash and her sails in tatters!"

McCarthy: "That was a great round by Joanna Garcia. This kid is impressing me."

Tess: "And she's winning this fight, 48-47 through five."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "Moving into the sixth now and Garcia looking to pressure. Pink working the left hand, circling, WHACKING the body with a right hook, ducking a right hand counter and landing a nice flurry to the head that backs Garcia up."

Tess: "Looks like those legs are coming back, Mac."

McCarthy: "Pink definitely moving better. And she's using that left jab to control Garcia. She's got Joanna reacting, fighting defensively now."

O'Dell: "Pink not pressing. Not looking for power shots. Just boxing here and outclassing the redhead. Garcia unable to get anything going. Pink beating her to punches and spots. Garcia missing or short with almost everything. Off balance and out of position."

McCarthy: "Pink dialed in right now and Garcia unable to counter what she's doing. Joanna's being shutout and shut down."

O'Dell: "Pink continuing to work professionally to the bell, completing a dominant round that's evened this thing up again."

Tess: "57-57 through six."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "We're on to round seven now and Garcia again looking to pressure. Pink moving, showing that superb athleticism of hers, using her quickness to beat Joanna to punches and spots."

McCarthy: "Garcia determined, though, Jenny. She's not backing up. She's hanging in there and fighting back, having some success on the counter."

O'Dell: "Pink content to box for points at the moment. Again not looking for the finisher. Using her skill and speed to excellent effect. Garcia, as Mac said, getting off better this round, finding some spots to land."

McCarthy: "Garcia's definitely game. She didn't come here to compete, she came to win."

O'Dell: "Pink double pops the left and fits a right to the head. Joanna lands a right hand counter. Both women go body and then back to the head and there's the bell. Good, exciting round. Any doubt Pink won it, ladies?"

McCarthy: "Competitive, but definitely Pink's."

Tess. "67-66 Pink through seven."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "Into the eighth now and Garcia coming forward. Pink willing to give ground. Circling and jabbing, using the legs. Garcia landing the jab. Pink continuing to give ground. Backing toward the ropes, as Joanna now stalking. Pink now against the ropes and working from the pocket."

Tess: "What's up with this, Mac? What's Pink up to here?"

McCarthy: "This is another way to look for the big one, fight counter from the ropes. Not sure it's something she should be doing, because she controlled those last two rounds with movement."

O'Dell: "Pink slipping in some good counters, but Joanna busier. Working up top, then digging body for points. Not hurting Pink, but scoring. Pink shoves Garcia off, digs a hook to the ribs. Joanna flurries back, landed a couple of clean ones there."

McCarthy: "Pink finding some openings here, but she hasn't gotten the big one she's looking for..."

O'Dell: "And she's not going to, as Garcia lands again at the bell, and Joanna's won the round."

Tess: "And she's evened the fight at 76!"

McCarthy: "Pink's attempt to take Garcia out didn't work, and it cost her a round."

ROUND NINE:

O'Dell: "Ninth round underway and it's an aggressive Pink out after Garcia. Now Joanna giving ground as Pink works forward behind a good left jab. Pink hooks the body, then back upstairs with the jab."

McCarthy: "Joanna circling and looking to box. Jabbing and using her feet to make Pink chase. I'm getting more impressed with this kid all the time..."

O'Dell: "Pink chasing...AND GARCIA ROCKS HER WITH A RIGHT HOOK! WALKED HER INTO IT AND PINK IS DAZED!"

McCarthy: "Garcia going all in now. Kid wants to finish here."

O'Dell: "Pink backed into the ropes and covering up, tying up, Joanna shoving free and banging to the body, winging away upstairs looking for the finisher. Pink hanging tough here..."

Tess: "What DOES it take to put that girl down! Garcia might as well grab the stool and hit her for all the difference it would make!"

O'Dell: "But she doesn't HAVE to put her down, instead she's piling up points, landing a couple of nice jabs in the closing seconds and she's won the round!"

McCarthy: "Pink is down going into the last round, and she's put herself here, giving away the first and the eighth messing around."

ROUND TEN:

O'Dell: "Well, I'd be lying if I told you I thought we'd be in this position in the tenth, Joanna Garcia on the brink of pulling an upset and here we go. Both ladies need the round and they're acting like it, going right after one another, both letting the hands go! Pink lands a good one/two and Joanna fires right back with a combination of her own! Both girls going for it here, Mac!"

McCarthy: "Nothing to lose. Pink's got to have this round, and, if Garcia gets it, she wins the fight."

O'Dell: "Garcia lands a good left, and Pink rips a left/right home, getting Joanna's attention. Pink now moving the feet, snaps home a nice jab. Joanna a right hand counter and Pink flurries in response. Nobody holding anything back and the crowd to its feet as the pace picks up even further!"

McCarthy: "I said Garcia couldn't trade with Pink. I meant she couldn't do it all night. But right now she can and should. Pink having the better of it, but Garcia needs to stand in there and try to steal this thing."

O'Dell: "And Pink lands a clean right hand that got Joanna's attention. A couple of jabs and a hook follow. Joanna lands a good right and Pink a snapping jab to end the round."

McCarthy: "Pink"s round. We've got it tied, Walmart!"

Tess: "95-95. Let's see what the judges say."

O'Dell: "Decision is coming back...and it IS a draw. Which means possible overtime!"

McCarthy: "Now, fans, keep in mind that overtime is NOT mandated in the FCBA. It's up to the fighters to decide and both have to agree. As Lacey Chabert will attest."

O'Dell: "Referee talking to the corners..."

Tess: "You think it'll happen, Mac?"

McCarthy: "No doubt Pink wants it, because a draw doesn't help her. But, Garcia's corner has to want to take this and run..."

O'Dell: "Pink nodding the head. She's agreed to the OT...AND GARCIA SAYS LET'S DO IT!"

McCarthy: "Truck? Get me Sceej on the phone. We gotta SIGN this girl..."

ROUND ELEVEN:

O'Dell: "Remember the rules of OT. First woman to take a two point lead wins. And the fight continues until that happens or we get a stoppage. There's the bell for round eleven, and Garcia right after Pink again, landing a solid combination."

McCarthy: "Right now, Joanna can let it all go. She has NOTHING to lose at this point. No matter what happens from here, she's made a statement tonight."

O'Dell: "And Joanna a good right and now Pink a big flurry and Garcia sent backward! Pink landing some solid shots and she's got Garcia in full retreat. Joanna being backed into the ropes and Pink hammering at the midsection, then SNAPPING Joanna's head back with a straight left hand!"

McCarthy: "Garcia's hurt!"

O'Dell: "And Pink all in now, hammering away at Joanna's guard as Garcia moves the head and shoulders and covers up trying to survive this one."

Tess: "Pink really digging body now, piling on the punishment, sensing she's finally got this girl ready to go!"

O'Dell: "A good right/left by Pink and Joanna wobbled but hangs on at the bell!"

McCarthy: "Just a reminder, fans, that, in overtime, the results of each round are announced, but there's no need to announce this one. Pink's round and she's up 105-104."

O'Dell: "And that's the announcement that's been made. We'll go to the 12th with Joanna needing trhe round to stay alive."

ROUND TWELVE:

O'Dell: "And we're off in the twelfth. Pink right after Garcia, trying to seal the deal and Joanna banging right back! The two girls brawling in close now, banging away, looking for a finisher..."

McCarthy: "I get what Pink's doing here, and I've been known to do the same thing...SHUT IT, WALMART..."

Tess: "Wow...never even got the line started...and drink up, boys!"

McCarthy: "AHEM...BUT she ought to go outside and box for points and try to win this thing rather than slug with Garcia..."

O'Dell: "But that's not the way she's playing this. The girls standing toe-to-toe and banging away. Pink misses a bomb...and GARCIA ROCKS HER! ANOTHER COUNTER FROM JOANNA!"

McCarthy: "This is what I mean! Too aggressive! And in some other rounds, not aggressive enough!"

O'Dell: "And Garcia is going to work again. Pink wobbled. Joanna trying to turn out the lights, landing with both hands, backing Pink up, has her in deep trouble..."

Tess: "Needs that stool, because Pink will not go!"

O'Dell: "But not due to lack of effort by Garcia, who continues piling on the punishment right to the bell! Pink unsteady on the way back to the corner! What a round for Joanna!"

McCarthy: "Again, no need to announce the winner of the round. It's now 114 each!"

O'Dell: "That's indeed what's been announced and we're on to the thirteenth!"

ROUND THIRTEEN:

O'Dell: "And here we go in round thirteen...and GARCIA LIGHTS PINK UP! Pink rocked and Joanna going all in now, trying to finish this thing once again. She's pasting Pink, trying to take her out of there, backing her up, winging away..."

Tess: "Neither woman doing much boxing or playing any defense in overtime, are they, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Not a surprise, Walmart. A lot of overtimes go this way. You train for ten rounds, so you're getting tired by this point and looking to finish the thing..."

O'Dell: "And that's what Joanna is...PINK WITH A RIGHT HOOK AND GARCIA IS STAGGERED! PINK NOW ALL OVER GARCIA, DRIVING HER BACKWARD. JOANNA'S LEGS WOBBLY AS SHE'S BACKED INTO THE ROPES!"

McCarthy: "Pink just hammering away now looking to finish Garcia! Joanna trying to hang on!"

O'Dell: "Pink looked all but out of it, but she answered like a champ and has Garcia sponging up leather along the ropes! Referee looking in, but letting it continue. Garcia rocked again with a two-punch combination, clinching, literally hanging on to Pink at the bell! Both girls stunned and reeling!"

McCarthy: "But Pink stole the round! It looked like Garcia was going to at LEAST get the lead if not stop her. But Pink won the thing!"

Tess: "And the judges agree with you, Mac! 124-123 for Pink after thirteen!"

ROUND FOURTEEN:

O'Dell: "We are headed into the fourteenth round now and the bell rings and the two ladies meet in the center and begin banging away. Nothing artistic about what's happening here. Joanna Garcia and Pink simply having at one another toe-to-toe, both looking for a finisher that oddsmakers would tell you is long overdue."

McCarthy: "Neither woman moving their feet. Neither one trying to duck or pick off punches. Just swinging away, digging for points."

O'Dell: "Pink backs up Joanna with a right hands. Garcia right back in close, hooks to the body. Pink backs her up again with a hook to the chin. Joanna lands a left, Pink counters with a solid right. Back and forth they go, but, as she did toe-to-toe in the tenth, Pink getting the better of it."

Tess: "No quit in Joanna! She's still in there fighting in the fourteenth when a lot of people thought she wouldn't last to the fourth!"

O'Dell: "And Garcia still digging away at the bell. Both women all in as they head back to their corners...judges handing in their cards...AND IT'S OVER! Pink has won the fourteenth and won this fight via UD14, 134-132! Garcia shaking her head in her corner, clearly disappointed. But what an effort in a losing cause."

McCarthy: "I wasn't kidding about the call to Sceej truck. GET HIM ON THE PHONE!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go to the ring and Tess Valmore..."

Tess: "I'm with our winner, Pink, AND, in an unusual twist, her opponent, Joanna Garcia. Pink, she gave you quite a fight tonight..."

Pink: "Hey, I get it. I've got a fifteen fight winning streak going. EVERYbody wants to be the girl to break it. Frege wanted it. Jones wanted it, and now Red over here wanted it. Girls are getting UP for me, and I've got to deal with that and get up for THEM. But, take nothing away from Joanna. This girl fought a hell of a fight tonight. She wouldn't go away, wouldn't punk, and she was still chucking leather at me after fourteen freaking rounds!"

Tess: "Joanna, I could see how disappointed you were when the decision was announced, but you've got to be proud of your effort tonight..."

Joanna: "I didn't come here to survive or to look better than people expected. I came here to win. And against a lot of girls, I WOULD have. But, she just wouldn't GO. I kept thinking I had her, but she just kept sponging it up and coming back at me...I couldn't finish, and I'm disappointed."

Tess: "Well, I suspect a lot of folks took notice of your performance tonight, and I expect your phone to ring..."

Joanna(smiling): "If that happens, I'll pick it up on the first ring...unless it's HER calling about a rematch. THAT one is going to voicemail!"

Pink(smiling): "Don't hold your breath, Garcia."