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31 October 2012 Neve Campbell vs Jenny McCarthy

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 5 months ago

Neve Campvbell 09.jpg Jenny McCarthy 08.jpg

"WITCHES, PUMPKINHEADS AND BLACK CATS AT THE ASYLUM" PPV

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on October 31, 2012, 9:28 pm

BEFORE:

O'Dell: "Well, Tess, does your magic jack-o-lantern have any inside info for us?"

Tess: "Looks like Wiz didn't need to bring a contract down. Mac brought one with her, already signed by Sceej. Mac and Neve have signed, and Avril signed for Front Street. Of course, there's an FCBA representative at every sanctioned event, so he was available to sign as well, officially sanctioning the fight. It's going to begin at 11:15, so the fighters should be here any second..."

O'Dell: "Lights have gone down...and here comes the laser show. That's 'Also Sprach Zarathustra' you're hearing...and here she comes, 'The 21st Century Goddess', Brooklyn Decker! Decker headed this way dressed as the sexiest football referee you'll ever see..."

Tess: "Most referees cover their midriff and legs..."

O'Dell: "Brooke taking the seat to my left vacated by Mac..."

Brooklyn: "Good evening Jenny and Tess! And, for the record, if referees had legs and a midriff like MINE, they WOULDN'T cover them."

O'Dell: "To what do we owe the honor, Brooke?"

Brooklyn: "Well, of course, I'm not on the card tonight, but my FANS want to SEE me, and, since Mac will be in the ring, I thought I'd come down and help out with the broadcast. Truck take a shot of the table! Why are you panning the crowd. You've got three red hot blondes here!"

Tess: "Ordering the truck around already. She'll fit in perfectly."

"Listen, children, to a story
That was written long ago,
'Bout a kingdom on a mountain,
And the valley-folk below..."

O'Dell: "Now what...that's not the music either of our fighters use..."

'On the mountain was a treasure
Buried deep beneath a stone
And the valley people swore
They'd have it for their very own...'

Tess: "It IS tonight, because here comes Neve Campbell, and she's pointing at the owner's box where the singer of that tune, Jinx Dawson, sits next to The Grand Wizard!"

O'Dell: "A tribute to The Queen on her night, Halloween. Neve Campbell into the ring. Helped off with the robe by Jewel and Britney, who's taken Neve's place in the Front Street corner, to reveal the familiar black bikini..."

"Oh, the shark, babe,
Has such teeth, dear..."

Tess: "That's Bobby Darin! That's Bobby Darin! Who says Wiz doesn't have class?"

Brooklyn: "Well, of COURSE he has class. Front Street has the most class of ANY FCBA stable. It has ME in it!"

O'Dell: "Gonna tip my hat to the Man In The Hat here. Allowing Mac to come to the ring to her familiar song for her retirement match. And she's thoroughly enjoying this last trip down the aisle, smiling and waiving to the fans as she climbs into the ring. Sceej corner crew must have been in on this, because they were in the house tonight and are now helping Mac off with the robe to reveal that red bikini..."

Brooklyn: "You know, Mac DOES have a pretty good body. Not a SUPERMODEL body, but..."

Tess: "Oh, FOR..."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "We're about ready to go and Mac asking for a mic..."

McCarthy: "Hey, Jenny! Just in case you're wondering, I'm picking ME by KO!"

O'Dell: "And Mac tosses the mic out of the ring. Got a laugh from the crowd. Tess, let's get your pick..."

Tess: "I HATE to do this, but, Neve by TKO."

O'Dell: "Brooke?"

Brooklyn: "Obviously, I'm picking Neve Campbell!"

Tess: "You may be a blonde model, but you are NOT dumb."

O'Dell: "And here we go. Neve right after J-Mac. Stalking, working her left. McCarthy circling, snapping jabs in retreat. On her toes, showing a lot of movement."

Tess: "Jenny still quick and athletic even less than an hour from the big 4-O, but Neve showing good footwork, cutting off the ring, WHACKING body with that right hook."

O'Dell: "McCarthy out of dodge and back to open ocean. Neve right back after her. Crowding, thumping, scoring points with both hands."

Decker: "Jenny doesn't want to trade with Neve. I'm a WELTER and I don't want to trade with Neve..."

O'Dell: "McCarthy loping away but Neve closing again, landing to the body at the bell. Excellent round for Campbell."

Tess: "Neve up 10-9 as the two rivals head back to their respective corners."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Into the second, and Neve again pressuring McCarthy. J-Mac again on her toes, looking to jab and circle, but Campbell having none of it, THUMPING a left hook to the body, landing a right to the head. Jenny banging back with a flurry, and Neve answers with a right."

Tess: "Neve continuing to walk Mac down here, Jenny, and if this keeps up, J-Mac is in trouble."

O'Dell: "The series between these two has been all about the styles. When Mac's been able to win, she's done it with boxing and movement. When Neve's won, it's been with a nine pound hammer like the one she's using on J-Mac right now."

Decker: "McCarthy's landing better in this round, but it's still almost all of her back foot."

O'Dell: "And, once again, Neve cuts the ring and works the body at the bell. Two rounds in the books, and Campbell has the lead."

Tess: "20-18, and Mac wants to get on the board soon."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Into the third now, and Neve again pressuring. Jenny now showing some reverse motion, sticking the left, retreating, circling back, popping and getting moving again. Neve a little short with everything right now as Mac's not allowing her to get into position."

Tess: "Jenny mostly scoring with the jab, but she's sneaking in some rights and still able to slip away before Neve can get off."

O'Dell: "Mac using those legs to good effect this round. Confounding Neve with movement and slick boxing. Campbell still dogged in pursuit, but Mac's not getting caught much in this frame."

Decker: "The problem is, I don't think this is viable long-term for Mac. She's not dancing for ten rounds at this point in her career."

O'Dell: "Perhaps not, but she IS going to make it work in the third. There's the bell and Mac's got her first round."

Tess: "And she's cut Neve's lead to 29-28."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Into the fourth now, and the styles haven't changed. Neve pursuing. Jenny circling. Campbell cuts off the ring and they have a quick exchange there. Jenny bounces away, Neve closes, and another quick flurry..."

Decker: "Neither woman getting much on the punches. This is sparring intensity stuff. Neither one in great position because of the cat-and-mouse going on, but both trying to score anyway."

Tess: "These are two women who know one another's moves very well, and you're seeing some of that now."

O'Dell: "Campbell a couple of hooks, Mac responds with a quick one-two and she circles away and resets. Again Neve off first. Mac responds off the back foot."

Decker: "Neither doing any damage, but Neve's scoring more points."

O'Dell: "I agree with you, Brooke, and she gets the better of another short exchange there. McCarthy circles behind the left jab, snaps it out a couple of times and the bell ends it. Campbell's round."

Tess: "And she's back to that two-point lead, 39-37."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Into round five now, and Campbell again pressuring. Jenny banging away as Neve moves inside. Campbell hooking the body as McCarthy circles away behind her left."

Tess: "Mac accurate with that jab even on the move. Scoring points with it as Neve closes."

O'Dell: "Campbell bangs body again as she squares up Mac. McCarthy flurries to the head in response then circles away and sets up in the center."

Decker: "Good two-way action. Both women scoring. Both making their styles work."

O'Dell: "McCarthy showing some quick hands with a nice left-right. Campbell hooks the ribs and Jenny double pumps the jab. Nice exchange at the bell! Both women scored there ending a good, competitive round!"

Tess: "Mac had the better of it, I think."

O'Dell: "Agreed."

Tess: "And that brings us back to a one-point fight. Neve-48, Mac-47."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "Into the sixth now, and Neve again pressuring. Mac giving ground, circling, jabbing...AND CAMPBELL A RIGHT HAND!"

Decker: "Caught Mac with that hook and got her hurt!"

O'Dell: "And Neve now going into overdrive, hammering away at Jenny, forcing her back into the ropes, and going to work on both the head and body! Campbell ROCKS McCarthy again, this time with a straight right!"

Tess: "Neve clearly wants the stoppage here. Sensing she's got J-Mac..."

O'Dell: "AND MCCARTHY WITH A RIGHT HAND FROM NOWHERE! NEVE STAGGERED AND NOW J-MAC GOING ALL IN!"

Decker: "What is going ON in there?"

O'Dell: "Just your typical Campbell/McCarthy fight, and right now it's J-Mac in control, wobbling Campbell with a combination. Neve staggered again with a left hook! Jenny piling on the punishment now, looking for the off switch. Neve covering up along the ropes as J-Mac lands two more hard shots, and there's the bell! What a round!"

Decker: "How are you scoring that, Tess?"

Tess: "Even. And Mac made up quite a stagger to get there...and the score is now 58-57, Neve still up a point through six."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "We're into the seventh now and Jenny trying to follow up, but Neve not having it! Campbell stops Mac in her tracks and backs her up with some heavy shot!"

Tess: "Mac looking a litte spent. Used a lot of energy in the last part of the sixth."

O'Dell: "And Neve taking full advantage, walking the blonde down and making with the heavy leather..."

Tess: "Neve has a reputation for being a bantamweight who doesn't HIT like a bantamweight..."

Decker: "Take it from someone who's taken punches from Neve. She DOES hit like a bantamweight. A bantamweight swinging a BASEBALL BAT..."

O'Dell: "And she's using that wood to tatoo the ribs of Jenny McCarthy! Mac a more stationary target at this point, and Neve bringing all her guns to bear on it. Mac firing back, but getting the worst of it as Neve zeroes in and hammers away. McCarthy covering up along the ropes as the final seconds tick away, and Campbell has secured the seventh."

Tess: "Up 68-66 and this is familiar territory for Jenny against Neve. Just like the title fight in this same ring. Jenny down as we head into the final rounds."

Decker: "And she either needs to sweep them or come up with something big."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "The eighth underway and Neve back to the pressure. Has no intention of trying to win this one on points. She plans to take Mac out of here. Campbell working that body again, banging leather to ribs, backing McCarthy up."

Decker: "If Neve can keep grinding away like this, she'll be in control after this round."

O'Dell: "Campbell with a flurry...AND MAC WITH A LEFT HOOK COUNTER! MCCARTHY WOBBLED CAMPBELL WITH THAT LEFT HAND! AND NOW JENNY GOES TO WORK WITH BOTH HANDS!"

Tess: "McCarthy timed that counter perfectly and she's turned the round around with it!"

O'Dell: "Certainly has. She's got Neve in full retreat now, covering up as Mac bangs away to the head and body. McCarthy not all in. Very disciplined. Looking to set up the big shot that could end it. Neve against the ropes playing defense, ties up, forces a break. Gets off the ropes. Neve's got her legs back now, but Mac's in rhythm, finding the range, scoring to the bell. And she's won the eighth."

Tess: "77-76 Neve. One point through eight."

ROUND NINE:

O'Dell: "Into the ninth now, and Neve coming forward again. Mac, tying up. The two ladies wrestling around in the center now, grabbing with one arm and hitting with the other."

Decker: "Have to wonder if fatigue is going to play a role now. Both girls are in shape, of course, but neither one was training for this fight."

Tess: "Good point, Brooke."

O'Dell: "And neither woman doing much more than punching and clutching in this one. Mac lands a right there, Neve hooks the body, and they tie up and shove around again."

Tess: "This is a big round. If Neve gets it, she puts Mac in the position of needing a stoppage or a knockdown. If Mac can win it, it will all come down to the tenth."

O'Dell: "Neve shoves Mac off and NAILS HER WITH A RIGHT HAND! McCarthy misses a counter...AND NEVE STAGGERS MAC WITH A THREE PUNCH COMBINATION TO THE HEAD!"

Tess: "Jenny stumbled back and almost went down! Ropes saved her!"

O'Dell: "And Neve POURING in now, looking to finish. Mac covering up, trying to weather yet another Campbell storm. Neve to work downstairs, rocks Mac with an uppercut! Jenny's knees wobbled as the bell rings to end the ninth, and Neve Campbell's won it and taken a knockdown lead into the tenth!"

Tess: "87-85 Neve with just one to go. As you said, Jenny, Mac almost certainly needs a stoppage to win or a knockdown to take this thing to OT."

ROUND TEN:

O'Dell: "Here we go, what may be the final round of J-Mac's career..."

Decker: "I'm not buying that. Don't tell me she won't be fighting in some BAR in March. We'll see her again."

Tess: "I agree with Brooke. I don't think this is all for Mac, though she isn't going to fight regularly, I think we'll see her in a ring again. You know, she usually fights bigger girls in those pub brawls, Brooke. How about you?"

Decker: "I fight MAIN EVENTS in SOLD OUT ARENAS! I do NOT fight in BARS!"

O'Dell: "And speaking of main events in sold out arenas, we've got one going right now, and Neve Campbell is again pressuring. Working the body, as J-Mac gives ground."

Tess: "Can't believe Mac's going out like this. Got to know she's behind. Nothing to lose. No reason to take anything back to the locker room..."

O'Dell: "AND SHE'S NOT GOING TO! JENNY LETTING THE HANDS GO AND NEVE RESPONDS AND THEY'RE BANGING AWAY AT ONE ANOTHER!"

Decker: "Neve doesn't need to be doing this! She's GOT this thing!"

Tess: "This is about more than winning a fight to these two!"

O'Dell: "And it's about even more for Jenny than it is for Neve and McCarthy's going all in! She's backing Neve into the ropes, belting away, looking for the stoppage that eluded her the last time the two fought! Jenny letting everything go, and if this is the Grande Finale of her career she's lighting up the sky and lighting up Neve Campbell!"

Tess: "Leaving it all in the ring..."

O'Dell: "Mac looking for the off switch, but she's running out of time! Twenty seconds left! Mac lands a right hand. Ten seconds! Mac with a good left! Five seconds...it's not going to happen! J-Mac can't get it done! There's the bell and it's over!"

Tess: "Jenny won the round, but, if my card is right, she's fallen a point short...a microcosm of Jenny's career efforts against Neve. Just short."

O'Dell: "McCarthy raising her hands in victory, heading back to the corner as Neve does the same. Both having the gloves cut off as the scores are tabulated..."

Decker: "She's not going to like this..."

O'Dell: "Decision being announced now...it's unanimous...96-95 in favor of your winner, with an appropriate name for the evening, Neve 'The Bodysnatcher' Campbell!"

Tess: "Jenny just shaking her head at the decision, clearly doesn't agree with it, but not going crazy...and...she sticks out her hand...and Neve's going to SHAKE it!"

O'Dell: "Well, it's not exactly one of those HUGS Mac hates, but for Jenny and Neve it's the closest thing you're likely to see. A show of mutual respect from long-time rivals. And maybe the biggest upset of 2012 in the FCBA."

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I've got our winner, Neve Campbell, and, Neve, great effort tonight, especially considering you weren't planning on fighting..."

Neve(smiling): "Not bad for an old lady everyone wanted to put out to pasture after Hewitt, huh, Tess?"

Tess(smiling): "Not bad at ALL."

Neve: "I've still got something left. That being said, I'm not going to do this forever. The time's coming when I'm going to hang them up. But, right now, I'm still as good as anyone in this division and I'm not going to be pushed aside before I'm ready."

Tess: "Thanks, Neve. Jenny, I'm going to try to get Mac to say a few words. Mac...a minute?"

McCarthy: "It's 11:58, Walmart. I'm not turning 40 in this ring..."

Tess: "I'll make it quick. You weren't happy with the decision..."

McCarthy: "Oh, I KNEW I'd have to knock her out to win in Philly. They hometowned me last time. I knew they'd do it again."

Tess: "Have we seen the last of Jenny McCarthy in an FCBA ring?"

McCarthy: "It's 11:59. I'm retired in one minute, Walmart. I'm ALSO a loose cannon. And, for the fans at home...Until the next time someone signs your committal papers, so long from the Asylum!"