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18 January 2013 Lacey Chabert vs Brenda Song

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 2 months ago

Lacey Chabert 06.jpg Brenda Song 04.jpg

Posted by simguy on January 18, 2013, 10:01 am

BEFORE: First photo-shoot turns into a nasty brawl, setting the tone for a snarking, pushing, slapping, hair-pulling promotional period. "She's just a jealous old hag who can't handle my awesomeness," Brenda explains at podium. "Nobody cares about her stupid jugs anymore...she should just fight Simpson in mud somewhere and call it a career. Today's flyweights are all about speed and ballistic hitting power - not jugs and tummy. Once I've tuned her up, hopefully she'll see how the sport has passed her by!"

Chabert irritated, but under control for rebuttal. "First off, my jugs are THE main event at flyweight," Lacey clarifies in prefight, "Bren's not the first girl to try to downplay them, but there it is. Second, I've been beating up girls like Bren my entire career...everyone's supposed to be too fast, too slick, too cute: IT NEVER MATTERS! If a Kristen Bell can't take my punch, how the hell can a Brenda Song survive? Once I take Bren to ropes, she's mine. I'll just do what I do - put a magnificent body on her and grind her out. Can't wait to shut her up and lay her out!"

Bren in black OP bikini; small black gloves; shiny black hair in loose curls. Lacey in yellow bikini; small black gloves; brown hair in loose curls. Ref asks fighters to touch 'em up: Bren throws a right forearm into Lacey's jugs, then explains "What? I touched 'em up!" after the near riot settles down.

During R1: Bren: hands dangling loose at her sides; shifting position to her right, keeping weight on right leg; left hand quick off the thigh, dosing check jabs or hooks to keep Lacey off. Chabert stomping forward dukes-at-brows; bobbing on approach; trying to step-in and chop the jab while prepping a big right hand roundhouse for Brenda's left flank. Middle minute: Bren starting to mix in sneaky right hands off the thigh - poking 'em stiff to Lacey's mouth if Song can catch Chabert reaching. Brenda slick with the hook-and-pivot routine as well - cuffing Lacey's jugs, then turning her right flank...Chabert adjusting on the fly, always trying to be aggressor. Song maintaining distance with shimmying footwork - Lacey coming up short when she tries for chin, leaving herself vulnerable to quick-swatting receipts. Final minute, Song feints to freeze Lacey, then swipes her jugs a swat-across left; smacks those hooters a rising swat-across right...Song sliding back after lighting Lacey up to rack! Chabert enraged, storming forward...she chases Song nearly to apron, loads up a swinging right and DOWN GOES LACEY! Brenda bending in and down, HURLING an overhand right onto Lacey's chin just before Chabert can get off...Lacey crashing onto her face, hands trapped beneath her stomach, head towards ropes...IT'S OVER! KO1 in heartstopping fashion, Brenda Song!

After: Chabert in deep KO slumber: as badly stopped as she's ever been. Song giddy with victory, steps across Lacey's outstretched legs; bends at the waist with her curvy little legs locked in a sturdy A-frame; starts tick-tocking lefts and rights back and forth across Lacey's upturned glutes! Chabert fast asleep, eyes closed...she's completely oblivious to the fact she's getting her fanny waxed. Dense buttock meat jostling around all thick and conquered, then Song straightens up - pretty face BEAMING with pride: she places mitts-on-hips, nods aggressively like a cheerleader on the beat, and places her little brown right foot on Lacey's slumbering rump! Lacey lying all still and fleshy - looking like a girl just dozing in the sun, soaking up rays poolside until official finally drags Brenda away. "I'm the best, most awesome fighter at flyweight!" Song insists in postfight. "I'm too much! D'joo see me paste her pumpkins? (throws a little air-combo of rising left/rights) Lacey couldn't take my punch! NOBODY can take my punch! I'm like Lucy Liu in her prime - they don't build girls my size who can compete with me! If I jumped into Righetti just right? She'd go! I'm..." on and on in that vein - Bren obviously very pleased with herself and anxious to share with us all just how stupendous she is.