Posted by Simguy on 7/1/2005, 9:49 am.

Before: Diva boxing at its most flagrant--negotiations bogged down in dressing room details--girls insisting upon limiting one another’s entourages, music--both fighter showing up hours late for press conferences--it’s a circus. Interesting development in the Carey camp as Mariah retains Jessica Alba as a special consultant. Jess relates: “I’ve always thought Mariah had mad talent for boxing and that it was being wasted. I knew I could make technical improvements in her game, improve her conditioning and get her head together. We had a slogan in camp: “Pity boxing the day Mariah Carey gets her jab.” Well, she’s got one now, and I pity Tyra Banks!” Tyra in black lace push up. Leopard print bottoms--Mariah in glittery champagne bikini, halter style top, ring connections.

During R1: Carey orthodox, hands up, looking to step into her jab and feature a much straighter right hand than we’re used to seeing. Banks right at her chest, left dangling low--she’s looser, more relaxed, stepping to either side with a loping gait, looking Mariah over. Sporadic contact as girls threaten then back off, but Tyra makes a statement late. Dipping shoulder roll under Mariah’s jab, Tyra comes rocketing back a slinging right to jaw, beating Carey’s right hand and SENDING CAREY TO CANVAS! Mariah bludgeoned to her knees--eyes wide with shock--Banks preening, loving the sight of flabbergasted diva at her feet.

R2: Mariah gathering dukes at her chin, planting on that front heel as she steps--good balance, arms loose and relaxed, but she’s thinking too much, not letting her hands go. Tyra walking to her right with a frown, right hand cocked--she’ll dangle the left, then slap it, backhand it, swipe-hook it--just keeping Mariah guessing, Banks bending into supple, lethal right hands, carrying in close to Mariah, then palm-pushing her, setting her up for stroking mop-up lefts. Divas get to jawing late--Tyra promising an “early night’s sleep” for Carey, Mariah telling to “get ready, ‘cause it’s comin’.”

R3: Good round for Carey, showcasing a little of what she’s worked on in the gym. Good firm jab--Mariah able to mark off territory with the strike, snapping Tyra’s head back and steering Banks around. Straight, often lead right--an oily smooth punch that’s all Alba: ringing Tyra between the eyes to set up the torquing hook. Carey not much known for her left hand, but when she sets her feet, twists her hips and rolls through the punch it’s a beauty--Banks getting clipped and startled by the fluid power of the punch. Mariah also one for falling in and palming up--pushing on Tyra’s head, or pulling it down--setting her up for more greasy hooks on the way out. Shutout Mariah and look: Tyra’s wobbly butt back to her corner.

R4: Tyra answers, and answers with vigor. Mariah still doesn’t handle lateral movement well--Banks lopes around, turns either flank and licks away lanky. Big T stroking that body, doubting the Carey torso with every lick--big juicy strapping blows against the ribs, waist, saucy clawing across diva jug, Carey pouting, staring back foggily: she’s getting tarted up and doesn’t have any answers in the fourth.

R5: Tyra in a nice groove--steppin,’ sluggin,’ turnin’ Carey around the ring. Banks nice and big at times--schmoozing close, palming up on Mariah and muscling her back, stroking her the forget-me-not hook or uppercut on the way out. Carey a little dazzled, stumbling around, unbalanced--she doesn’t like the body shots and the push-n’-punch is working wonders on her., Banks lands a swinging right on the jaw midway through to send tremors through Mariah’s long legs--Tyra talking incessantly thereafter, walking Mariah down, bullying her as Carey starts to wilt.

R6: Tyra the boss--Mariah glum, getting lumped up., fighting only in spots. Bansk with her hands low, steps in and bends, pulling her limbs onto Carey, strapping her. Very tuff n’ muscular the way Banks will push Mariah off, cup her ears and tug her head around, then stroke her--Carey absorbing shellack, trying to box her way out of it. Mariah can’t set her feet, can’t get comfortable, so the new-look stuff isn’t working. Tyra’s occasional loud, scorching body shot bringing hoots of appreciation from the audience: grimaces of pain from a shopworn Carey.

R7: Identical round--Tyra steadily steppin’ and strappuin’ on Mariah, walking her down, pushing her around. Mariah finding spots when she can walk Tyra into the jab or lead right hand, but she’s not torquing in the hook the way she had been. Banks looking to belt the body hard when she’s in range: Caret reaching in and clinching up greasy, walking Tyra to ropes for breaks. Mariah downcast, discouraged--she’s having trouble competing tonight with a very sharp, very hungry Tyra Banks.

R8: Mariah establishes the lead right--oily., roping stroke between the eyes--Banks startled, getting her head snapped back--she’s forced to step put and retreat./ Mariah comes forward, seeking the lead right, now torturing the hook--Banks’ chin grazed asnd she backs off from the whistling power of the shot. Mariah gaining momentum, hooking wide and slow, then putting her hips into swinging right hands--Banks ducks and covers, allowing Mariah to palm up and shove muscular. Mariah giving Tyra a dose of supermodel medicine, combining punching and pushing in supple measure., Late the round, Carey pushes Tyra tottering backward, clips her a slinging hook on the chops and NAILS her a drifting straight right--while Tyra’s staring, reeling from the blows. Carey unleashes a shrieking hook--swiveling hips and torso into the rising blow, kissing Banks exquisitely on the chin. Tyra lifted up and back., deposited in a gangly pile of KO’d supermodel near a neutral corner. Ref doesn’t need a count: KO8 Mariah Carey in bone-crunching fashion.

After: Tyra long time coming around as Carey struts the ring: Mariah showing her old power stroke in new ways, finding a hook tonight along with some other wrinkles. Room for improvement--Mariah could punch the body better and work on her footwork, but it’s a fat win for a busty singer who also showed a decent chin against the big swinging right hand of Tyra. Diva treats Diva shabby in post fight--Carey glowing, beaming as she takes a stunned Tyra Banks about the waist and hauls her out for strutting walk of shame. Mariah waving with her left hand, cuddling Tyra close and cooing to her--poor Banks all woozy and distraught, just wants it to be over.

Reposted by Archer 5/26/13.