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10 July 2008 Kelly Ripa vs Kelly Monaco

Page history last edited by Archer844 7 years, 1 month ago


Kelly Ripa 02.jpg



Posted by Simguy on 7/10/2008, 11:21 pm.


Before: Ripa making weight at a sporty 110, popping a rigid double bicep pose on the scales with a big grin--still the body-beautiful after all these years. “I’ve always been the best pound for pound fighter to ever come out of soaps,” Kelly says conversationally, as though covering off the totally obvious. “Monaco slutty in comparison: I’m toned and battle-hardened. I’ll help myself to Kelly, then get back to bringing Longoria to heel. Once Eva’s in my back pocket, I firmly believe I can still win a championship at 110 with this body.” Monaco hovering around the periphery of the top 10: world class body, some big wins, some fantastic fighting photo reference—but title shits and big names continue to dodge the buxom phenom. “It’s hard,” Monaco shrugs, “but what can you do? You fight the Ripas and the no-name bimbos until a ranked fighter takes a risk—and when that happens--you make her pay. I’ll grease Kelly—I’m not worried about this fight—but flyweight is boxing’s youngest division and I don’t want to get bogged down with cougars and fading soap-opera types while I can still kick young ass.” Kelly in heartpounding scarlet bikini; small black workout gloves. Monaco in black lace push up (heartpounding)—tan panties from Maxim soot; small black workout gloves.


During R1: Monaco the aggressor early—spritizing jabs, scooting forward: Ripa giving ground, walking Mons into clinches and backing into ropes for ref’s breaks. Stop and go—Monaco rushing her blonde, but unable to clip her tasty: Ripa managing the blitz with tactical retreats and clinches—playing a little catch-and-release early. Good tempo—girls walking away from ref’s breaks with perky strides, alert expressions: very crisp. Snappy execution.


R2: Monaco continues to press behind her jab: Ripa’s had a good look, starts to scoot back and walk Mons into short, tight left hook counter. Fewer clinches as Monaco’s clipped and repulsed in early rushes: she backs off, yields initiative to Ripa, who begins to come forward. Kelly cutting off the ring with confidence, doubling up her jab to Monaco’s breasts, hooking her tart n’ tight—brunette scowling at Ripster’s snap. Midway through—girls scrabble away with a mutual flurry of lefts and rights: upon separation, Monaco’s hands are low—Ripa finds her with a sneaky, delayed left hook—STIFFENING MONACO’S LEGS! Kelly M’s knees lock up—she drifts backward, hitting on her backside and falling onto her elbows, face astonished as Ripa jogs to neutral corner. Monaco beats the county glassy-eyed/wobbly butt: she covers up hurt as Kelly R hops in in to finish. GLORIOUS burst of punches from Ripa—small mitts clawing, skidding, digging as brunette sits in ropes and soaks. Crowd roaring at the sight of Ripa’s pecs and tummy shredding into sinewy relief as she wails on poor Monaco. Kelly M brave n’ tuff—curvy kegs hold her up as she is battered without mercy to bell.


R3: Ripa the aggressor, grinning as she pumps her jab to Monaco’s chest, then walks her down. Monaco recovering well from the pasting—she’s got a little mouse under the left eye, but she’s effective in retreat—walking Ripa’s mouth onto a I’m-still-here jab. Nice stepping rhythm as blonde pursues brunette in a wide counter-clockwise rotation—girls spitting jabs, trading combinations without falling in too close. Midway through, Monaco crouches under a ferocious, clawing cluster if lefts and rights from Ripa-=-brunette easing out of range in the crouch, the straightening, weight on right leg. Ripa walks in and EATS THE HOOK! Monaco sneaky cute, lashes the left up off her hip and chin-tipping Ripa: Blonde legs jam up--torso droops forward with arms hanging down loose and BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Kelly hanging suspended in mid air for a moment, then crashing onto her face to lie in stupor at Monaco’s feet. KO3 in stunning fashion—Kelly Monaco.


After: Ripa arguably stronger, more aggressive and doing more damage up to the stoppage: sneaky punch she never sees ends Kelly R’s night in a thunderclap. Gorgeous whack--Monaco delivering perfectly off her right leg—pointing the toes of her left foot out front like a dancer: Jumbo-tron replays draws oohs and ahhs from appreciative fans. “I smoked a tramp,” Kelly Monaco shrugs in postfight, downplaying what may hold up as the KO of the Year. :Wake me when Jessica Simpson, Lacey Chabert or any of these other bimbo calls.”


Reposted by Archer 3/15/14.

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