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17 March 2014 Padma Laksmi vs Brooklyn Decker

Page history last edited by Archer844 10 years ago

Padma Lakshmi.jpg Brooklyn Decker 04.jpg

ST PATRICK'S DAY MASSACRE AT THE ASYLUM

(Site: The Asylum Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania)

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on March 17, 2014, 3:17 pm

BEFORE:

"Every brunette in the FCBA knows Decker needs to be dealt with," says a hard-eyed Padma. "Lima started that process, and, tonight, I'm going to move it a little further along."

"It's time for me to move on from the models," says Brooklyn with a stunning smile and a shrug. "I'm a TV star now, so it's time for me to start dealing with type rivals in that arena. Padma's nothing special. She's just first in line."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Getting ready for our fourth contest of the night and that's Eels and 'The Look You Give That Guy', and here comes the star of said video, the gorgeous Padma Laskshmi..."

McCarthy: "I'm not much of a fan of Lakshmi, who isn't Playmate material..."

Tess: "Hef would open the VAULTS to get Padma in the magazine..."

McCarthy: "Why would he bother? He could get a hotter girl just by calling ME. And I'd do it for less..."

Tess: "Too easy, Cassie?"

Cassie: "Much like Mac, yes..."

McCarthy: "Shut it, BOTH of you!"

O'Dell: "Drink up once again, boys! Padma into the ring, helped off with the robe to reveal an orange bikini that has a lot of jaws on the floor. And, down go the lights and here comes the laser show..."

McCarthy: "Ridiculous!"

O'Dell: "And, that's 'Also Sprach Zarathustra' by Strauss, and here comes 'The 21st Century Goddess', Brooklyn Decker!"

McCarthy: "AS I was saying when Walmart interrupted me, I'm not much of a fan of Lakshmi, but Decker is INSUFFERABLE! A girl with ZERO talent who got famous by showing off her body, and she thinks she's something special..."

Cassie: (makes choking noises)

McCarthy: "What's the matter, Shark Girl, you get a bad piece of fin?"

Tess(chuckling): "Do you have something to say, Cassandra Lynn?"

Cassie: "I'm going to let the record speak for itself, Tess..."

O'Dell(sighing): "Decker with a stare at this table that could freeze the sun..."

McCarthy: "I will SMACK the ugly off her FACE...!"

Tess: "I do believe that glare is for ME, Mac. Brooke's not very happy with me these days..."

McCarthy(chuckling): "Oh, that's right. One of Weirdo's tame reporters called Decker a choker...I'm proud of you, Walmart!"

Tess: "Well...I didn't actually SAY 'choker'..."

O'Dell: "Decker into the ring, helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve, and there's something ELSE that speaks for itself, Brooklyn Decker's body in that yellow bikini. Ladies about ready. Let's get some picks. Tess favors Brooklyn. Mac?"

McCarthy: "Padma hasn't been in an FCBA ring in a while, and that gives Decker an advantage, but I still hope Lakshmi knocks her block off!"

O'Dell: "Cassie?"

Cassie: "I agree with Tess."

O'Dell: "Here we go. Decker wasting no time getting the, and I'll get this out of the way, 'Front Street Jab' going..."

McCarthy: "Again, it's a JAB. Every fighter HAS one..."

Cassie: "And, again, not like THIS one. This is a power jab like George Foreman used to throw, and many of the Front Street bigs have developed it."

O'Dell: "Decker locating with the jab, but Padma slick, moving very well. Has great feet. Very lithe and supple. Leaning away from punches, twisting the body, almost snake-like in her motions. Decker working hard, being disciplined, using the left to set up right hands. Lakshmi hard to find, but Decker's doing it some."

Tess: "Lakshmi's background is in submission wrestling and ribbon fighting, and you can see some of that experience in the way she moves."

O'Dell: "Decker having to work hard to square Padma up, but she's managing to do it some. Brooke scoring mostly with the left, not getting the power blows on target. Padma working mainly with her quick left. Landing the odd combination. Seems to be feeling Decker out a bit, mostly playing defense. Final seconds of the first round tick away and there's the bell. Decker's round."

McCarthy: "And also a pretty good illustration of the contrast in styles we have. Padma's guile and elusiveness against Decker's power."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Back to work in round two, and again it's Brooklyn Decker trying to find the elusive Padma Lakshmi. Laksmi silky smooth, moving the feet and body well. Decker using that long, strong left jab effectively, moving her own feet well, working hard to square Lakshmi up..."

Cassie: "Decker staying patient. That's what she has to do. She can't get sloppy or overly aggressive."

O'Dell: "And, for the moment at least, she isn't. Decker working deliberately, finding Padma when she can, looking to create openings for that big right hand. Lakshmi picking her spots, using her own slick, quick left to good effect."

Tess: "Padma's style makes her very interesting to watch, all slinky movement and coiled lashing punches."

O'Dell: "And 'lashing' is a good way to describe Padma's punches. They just suddenly STRIKES out, land, and are gone. It's a contrast to Brooklyn's own heavy blows that land like a hammer. Decker continues to pursue, working hard to locate as Lakshmi slickly avoids being located. We come down the stretch with a good, snapping right from Padma and, in response, a flurry from Decker. Some of those missed, but a good left hand landed. Padma responds with a popping jab and Decker a long right hand and there's the bell. Brooklyn's round again."

McCarthy: "And that puts her up 20-18 after two."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Third begins with Decker still the aggressor. Padma fighting counter, all slick, slinky movement. Decker again using that left to locate, but Padma very hard to find..."

McCarthy: "Not sure Lakshmi can keep this up for ten at her age, but if she can, she's going to make a fight of this. Almost everything Decker lands is off the end of the bat. She can't barrel Padma up."

O'Dell: "Lakshmi landing better in counter now, walking Decker into oily traps. Brooke not hurt, but, to use that term again, LASHED by quick, stinging strikes. Decker resolute. Working hard to bring that big blonde power to bear, but Padma having none of it."

Cassie: "Brooke continues to work with the feet, trying to get square. Not forcing the home run. Good discipline."

O'Dell: "And Padma's starting to get in rhythm now, anticipating Decker, thinking two or three moves ahead and scoring with counters as Brooke's right hands fall short or wide or glance off gloves. Final 30 second now and Lakshmi snapping out that jab, targeting perfectly, all angles and slippery guile. Good right hand follow there by Padma and that's the bell. Lakshmi's on the board."

Tess: "29-28 through three."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Fourth round underway and Decker turning up the pressure now. Brooke looking to cut ring and thump away. Padma still difficult to square to the head, so Decker's going body instead."

McCarthy: "I was wondering when the geniuses in the Front Street corner were going to suggest this. They should have been doing it from the opening bell!"

O'Dell: "Lakshmi keeping the hands high, letting Decker fight lead, dodging and ducking, blocking and blunting. Decker staying in control, going body heavy when the head hunting doesn't work."

Tess: "They're on the opposite side of the ring from us right now, and we can hear the thump of Decker's leather off Padma's body despite the headsets."

O'Dell: "But Lakshmi is shipping it and not bringing that high guard down. Wants to keep the gloves up where she can pick off Decker's power shots. Lakshmi scoring some in counter, but not overly busy offensively as we head down the stretch. Decker doubling down on the body in the final seconds. Lakshmi responds with a good flurry and Brooke lands a heavy left at the bell. Plenty of good, slick stuff from Padma, but Decker scored most of the points."

Tess: "And extended her lead to 39-37."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Fifth round begins with Decker right back after Padma and looking to work more body. Lakshmi not having it, tying Brooke up inside to smother her offense. Referee breaks and Padma a quick flurry before tying Brooke up again."

McCarthy: "This is the second strategic adjustment Lakshmi's corner has made in five rounds. Campbell doesn't make that many in a year..."

Cassie: "Well, as I recall, Neve didn't NEED to make any against you. She just slipped the gear shift into 'Whip A**' and hit the gas..."

McCarthy: "I WAS ROBBED TWICE..."

Tess: "Here we go..."

McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"

O'Dell(sighing): "The punch and clutch isn't exactly pretty, but it's effective. And, for the first time tonight, Padma is frustrating Decker. Brooke shoving at the brunette to break these clinches, but Padma slick, tying up an arm, pulling down on the head, banging body with a free hand."

Cassie: "Decker needs to punch out of these and not try to wrestle. Get a little separation and hit an uppie. That'll get Lakshmi's attention."

O'Dell: "Right now, Brooke can't get much separation at all. Padma all long-limbed whippet punches and rangy tie ups she learned in submission wrestling. Decker spending a lot of time looking at her boots, as Lakshmi ties up that head, forces it down. Decker shoves free and lands a right, but there's the bell, and Padma has the fifth."

Tess: "And she's cut the lead to one again, 48-47."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "Second half of the fight begins with Decker again trying to press the issue. Lakshmi now working behind that whippet jab, moving right away from Decker's power, circling and back-stepping. Brooke trying to match footwork, get square, stepping forward into sharp right hands."

Cassie: "Decker getting a little beguiled here. I suspected all along that making Brooke work against this style was one of the reasons this fight was booked. She didn't handle it well the last time, against Helfer."

O'Dell: "Lakshmi looks like she's playing chess while Decker's playing checkers right now, that's for sure. Padma wrong-footing Brooke, catching her with sneaky right hands. Decker working hard, but not landing much of import."

McCarthy: "Padma baiting Decker right now. Puts the hands high, and as Brooklyn sets to punch, takes a quick slide step and snaps off a nice right hand. She's making Decker look silly. I LOVE it."

O'Dell: "Padma really getting in rhythm now, chaining her feints and punches together. Decker completely out of sorts, can't seem to figure out what Lakshmi's going to do next or how to counter it. Decker's work rate has decreased considerably. She's doing a lot of waiting, looking for openings that aren't there. Final seconds tick away and there's the bell, and Padma's evened this thing up."

Tess: "Certainly has. 57-57 after six."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "Seventh round underway and Decker again pursuing, trying to locate with the big left. Lakshmi all silky, slinky motion, using jab steps, stepping with the left foot then firing a right off the back shoulder. Double pivoting and snapping out a left, again off the back foot..."

McCarthy: "She's got Decker raising her guard waiting for punches that aren't coming at this point."

O'Dell: "She's also got her not letting her hands go. Brooke very hesitant to punch at this point. Padma all feinting with the left, dropping in a right, throwing punches off the wrong foot, landing a right hand lead there. She's casting spells on Decker, who seems to be totally befuddled at the moment..."

McCarthy: "Not that that's hard to do. She's not exactly a candidate for MENSA..."

Cassie: "But, they're beating a path to YOUR door?"

McCarthy: "Shut it, Scabbo!"

O'Dell: "Lakshmi popping a left, then another. Feints with the right and lands another left. Decker now bringing the guard up and Lakshmi does nothing. Brooke drops the hands and Padma lands a quick, snappy right hand. Final seconds of the round tick away. Padma jab steps with the left and Decker takes a step back right into a right hook at the bell. Another round for Padma and Decker may be in trouble here, ladies."

Tess: "She's behind for the first time, down 67-66 with three to go."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "Eighth round about to begin and Decker got a talking to between rounds, Tess..."

Tess: "Let's just say we didn't pot up the live corner mic for a reason, and that reason was Neve's colorful vocabulary. And this IS HBO."

O'Dell: "And Decker's apparently taken what Neve said to heart, because she's getting busy. No more waiting on Padma, Brooke is fighting lead again, thumping out that sledgehammer left jab and winging right hands. Missing a lot because of Padma's defensive skills, but she's scoring some and keeping Lakshmi on the defensive."

Cassie: "This is what she needs to do. Just hit whatever she can find. She can't play snake and mongoose here. She needs to play snake and steam roller."

O'Dell: "And that seems to be the plan. Padma still plenty elusive, getting off occasionally in counter, but Decker letting the hands go. Landing the odd heavy shot, but mostly glancing stuff, but she's forcing Lakshmi to keep the guard up, not allowing her to get off."

Tess: "Padma doesn't seem all that bothered, though. She's willing to box counter and pick her spots. Not going to get into a slugging match here."

O'Dell: "Which is a good idea, because Lakshmi is not the steam roller in Cassie's little scenario. Brooke working to cut ring. Having a little success, but still having to work hard to land anything. Padma just so hard to square up. Decker continuing to try, however, sending enough leather the brunette's way that some of it finds the target. Final seconds tick off and there's the bell. Decker's round, no question."

McCarthy: "And it's anyone's fight. 76-76 through eight."

ROUND NINE:

O'Dell: "Ninth round underway and Decker aggressively at Padma again. Brooklyn THUMPING that heavy left, walking in behind it, crowding in on Padma. Lakshmi tying up, but now Decker having none of it, not wrestling with the brunette, but punching her way free, hooking those ribs and lats..."

Cassie: "This is Brooke getting big girl, and this is EXACTLY what she needs to do to combat a girl fighting Padma's style."

O'Dell: "Lakshmi working off the ropes now, in the pocket, looking to counter. Padma keeping the hands high, snapping out those lashing lefts and sizzling rights in spots, but mostly being suppressed. Decker carpet bombing the arms, then working downstairs to hammer that tawny torso..."

McCarthy: "Padma starting to breathe hard, getting worked over for the first time in the fight..."

O'Dell: "And Decker's far from finished. She can see Lakshmi starting to break down in the pocket, and she's laying in even more heavy shell. Brooke finding the range more often now. Padma still slipping and blocking some shots, but more leather is getting through. Decker loading up on the right hand down the stretch, banging shots to the body, working over the midsection and lathering those lats right to the bell. Good round for Decker..."

Tess: "And check out Neve in the corner. Fist pump and fist BUMP. THAT'S what she wanted to see. That and Decker taking the lead 86-85 with one to go."

ROUND TEN:

O'Dell: "Tenth and final underway and Brooke immediately after Padma. Lakshmi giving ground, circling, trying to create some space, but Brooke not having any, willing to take a couple of those slicing lefts to close, crowd, and go to work on the body. Padma being forced back to the ropes again."

Cassie: "It's no wonder Neve is liking this. This is vintage Neve Campbell, cut the girl off and punish the body."

O'Dell: " And that's exactly what Decker is doing. She's got Padma back on the ropes, fighting in the pocket. Lakshmi again looking to counter, leaning back in the ropes, keeping the guard high. Decker hammers at her arms, bangs that body, scoring points and piling on the hurt."

McCarthy: "Lakshmi needs to get busy, here. She needs this round. She can't let Decker just pound it out."

O'Dell: "But that's exactly what Brooke is doing. She's suppressing Lakshmi, keeping her on the ropes, forcing her to cover up and stay on the defensive. The brunette not as worried about winning this round as she is surviving it, because Decker has her right where she wants her..."

Tess: "This is the Brooklyn Decker who beat girls like Bell, Everhart, and Govich. A big, physical, power-puncher."

O'Dell: "And Padma's feeling all of that power right now, shipping a load of shell as the tenth and final comes to an end. There's the bell, and Decker's won the last three, and, on our cards at least, the fight."

Tess: "We've got it 96-94..."

O'Dell: "Decision being announced, and it is unanimous, 96-94 in favor of your winner by UD10, 'The 21st Century Goddess', Brooklyn Decker!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I have our winner, Brooklyn Decker, and, Brooke, she gave you some trouble for awhile..."

Brooklyn: "She's skilled and slick, but I'm too strong for her. It was only a matter of time until I broke her down. When Big Brookie D starts landing the leather, there aren't many girls who can stand up to it."

Tess: "What's next for 'The 21st Century Goddess'?"

Brooklyn: "As you know, I've moved on from models now that I'm a TV star, so, I'll be looking to subjugate that cohort. There are several girls on my list. I won't mention names tonight, that way we can keep them all just a little on edge, just a little concerned that I might be coming for them."