JESSICA SIMPSON (LOOKOUT BOXING) VS JESSICA LOWNDES (LIONESS CLUB OF AMERICA)

(JMD Bout)

(Words: Vassago / Results: Lookout!)

BEFORE: It's a long-awaited rematch between two enemies from the days when Jessica Lowndes was still just learning the boxing curves while Jessica Simpson thrived on the "living legend of JMD" label already. "Remember me, Jessi?", Simpsy triggers the trash talk in wake of her epic eight round punchout of the brunette over two years ago but how the times have changed since then! Instead of accepting the Lookout! superiority the Canadian actress had the courage to demolish Vanessa Hudgens & another frequent nemesis Michelle Williams on her way to JMD glory which only took then champion Lacey Chabert to finally derail in mind-over-matter fashion.

"Lowndes is sooo damn overrated I can't stand it! I gave her a proper lesson last time out and it's time to play the familiar tune again! She could have stopped Nessa and Mishy's jugs but she's got nothing on me! Time to punch her sagging mounds back to Canada!"

Lowndes remains a bratty operator but dwells on confidence herself: "Simpsy is delusional to remind everyone of our previous little meeting and think she's going to repeat that ever again. I've improved a ton since then and let's be honest, I'm gonna shatter her JMD career once and for all. Unlike Mishy or Nessa, she won't come back for more jug mauling cause she's gonna be left without any jugs after I'm done punching it all the way back to Texas! She thinks she's the legend? More like a walking punchbag needing an oxygen supply! Let me at her NOW!!!"

Hectic atmosphere during introductions, Lowndes shadow boxes dangerously close to the blonde's rack and ignores the ref's plea to touch gloves. Simpsy on the verge of punching her over the referee's shoulder and throwing a death stare that would put the brunette six feet under on the spot. Jessica Simpson wears a white mono-kini tied around the neck and just below the breasts with a red ribbon and carved on the ribcage fully exposing some toned flesh. Blonde hair in loose curls on the bottom. Jessica Lowndes wears a black anchor shaped mono-kini, carved at the ribs too but exposing more jug on each side. A blue ribbon below the breasts just about holds the outfit in one piece but only some lingerie designers probably know how. Dark brown hair straight, tucked behind the left ear, flying loose on the other side. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the flyweight division, Jugs of Mass Destruction rules applied.

Round 1:
On comes the living legend as both girls square up in the middle of the ring but it's Simpsy with the heavy connection spiking the blue ribbon and slicing through the Canadian's arms to close right up and thump her jugs with a spirited jabbing. Lowndes gets beaten for the first punch, can't find her rhythm with the blonde so eager to make her suffer and has to settle for a meaningless low effort on the exposed ribcage before Simpsy blasts a cross hook from the left that wobbles the brunette and forces her on the back foot. Blonde girl glued on the blue ribbon trying to punch it off as quickly as possible and rocking Lowndes' mounds to inflict some worrying moans and she's dwarfed by the early excahnge and unable to even sway Simpsy's own assets. All blonde girl thereafter who pushes the struggling Canadian back to the ropes and keeps rocking her cleavage until she eats a last-ditch hook on top of the red ribbon but it makes no difference as the singer just blasts an uppercut in fury and whips Lowndes against the ropes, the chest nicely exposed just waiting to get wrenched... a vicious left/right combo buries Lowndes butt-in-ropes and sagging but the bell prevents Simpsy from more incoming damage.. the legend looks pissed she couldn't quite finish beating the brunette up.

Round 2:
Lowndes outraged by the opening round, just got lectured in JMD by the veteran but bursts out of her stool in classic vengence mode, before one knows it they hammer away at each other's mounds and there's no visible dominance from any of them for a while but the brunette finally puts too much weight behind her shots and Simpsy ducks around her causing to wobble forward just so ready for a heavy right hand straight on the blue ribbon. Lowndes winces again and fails to regain her stance, gets wrenched from inside as Simpson clatters into her and bumps off balance for good, always good to dig some elbow on the chest and a piercing right jab thumps the Canadian cleavage forcing Lowndes back to find some breath. Texas girl in hot pursuit but only catches the forearms and a lurid scream from Lowndes meets with her right hook clubbing the singer's navel and forcing a late clinch with both girls trying to wrestle each other down in pure disdain and frustration.

Round 3:
Both girls jump at each other so vigorously that they almost clash heads but as Simpson tries to make one deke more before finding her striking zone, Lowndes just clubs away mindlessly and finds the uppercuts on the jugs to stagger the blonde and still beat her for another cross hook from the top that sags her on the spot. Lowndes in more mindless bash but precision is required as she digs some leather on the area but clips the forearms too often and Simpson uses her footwork to step away to safety down the stretch. Furious Canadian pursuit follows but the singer works the single hand set up before pumping some on the ribcage and cross hooking the carved cleavage from the side... Lowndes slows down trying to focus on her precision and gets whacked with immediate uppercut galore that slices her mitts and enforces another mindless bash; Simpsy leans on with eyes glued on the blue ribbon but eats the biggest punch of the dying seconds as Lowndes nailed her straight up the alley and staggered on the spot... a loud squeal of pain comes out from the singer's mouth who nearly stumbles forward, arms going all over the place and she's exposed to more damage but the brunette can only catch her with one more cross hook which was slightly mistimed anyway before the clock expires much to her anger.

Round 4:
Simpson checks up whether her red ribbon stayed in tact wary of some Vanessa Hudgens wardrobe malfunctions before but it's there alright for the time being. Lowndes all over her jugs in another wild tangle though and the drilling jabs on the ribcage set up a desired stance with the blonde turning to the side and exposing a side attack from the left which has the brunette rotating the singer around at will. Simpsy outworked in close range and just clipping the blue ribbon before a left/right combo slips by her guard and tags the jugs, causing another drop in pace. Lowndes jumps at her and Simpsy just didn't thought that's possible, gets bumped dangerously close to the ropes and spikes back over the top pumping her mitts on top of the anchor shaped mono-kini above the Canadian jug... watch out... left hook pumps some blonde rack instead as Lowndes finds the opening and works the left hand instead and traps the Texas blonde on the turnbuckle, switches to uppercutting the guard aside and has Simpson scowling... All-in approach from Lowndes spins the red ribbon loose and it's one-way traffic late on as Simpson can't stretch her elbows nor cover up and gets wrenched into turnbuckle by a very vocal Canadian who just cartwheels her mitts straight on target.. another bell saves one girl from misery but it's the blonde locks whipped against the ropes this time and Simpsy hugs her jugs for the first time in visible pain as she needs to tighten up the red ribbon since her assets were really close to go their own way there.

Round 5:
Lowndes hits the red mist mode after getting so close to inflict a wardrobe malfunction on a bitter enemy. Her eyes glued on the red ribbon but disaster strikes as she mistimes her approach and Simpson jumps at her instead with more speed than was anticipated.. belting right hook on the navel bends the surprised brunette forward and is followed by a heavy uppercut on the chest that whips Lowndes on the back foot on the spot... Simpsy might be aching but she finds the veteran saving grace when she needs it the most and just gallops into the Canadian cleavage to raise Lowndes' shrieking volume within seconds... SIMPSY POUNDS AWAY TO GLORY... tries to butcher the Lowndes' rack and pummels her back on the ropes as the younger girl clearly can't find her breath and just covers up in vain as Simpson batters away from the side and makes the connection count... Lowndes trapped butt-in-ropes and soaking up some Texas leather... Blonde leans on her and can bite her in the neck if she wanted to; keeps drilling the left hand on the carved mono-kini top and refuses to let go as Lowndes sags on her knees and tries to clinch her opponent somehow but to no avail as Simpson screams out in her ear: "Remember me, b*tch?"... the brunette's right breast takes most of the punishment and the proud Canadian clearly wants just to survive the unexpected onslaught and has the stroke of luck that the singer gasses out before she can even send her down... the close range slugging just lacked enough power to render Lowndes numb and shaky even if the sheer amount of punches was too good to ignore. Bell.

Round 6:
Both girls visibly exhausted after non-stop action but the age and fighting wear difference helps Lowndes to recover faster as Simpsy would be better off with a two minute interval instead of one. Wrenching approach on the navel catches the Texas girl napping and she bends forward bumping her chin against the brunette's shoulder; shrieks out in pain but ref turns a blind eye on the accidental clash especially that Lowndes hooks an uppercut combo on the rack moments later and whips Simpsy backwards with her gloves almost crashing off her face... Blonde girl stumbles to the side but is too slow to react for the oncoming leather... Lowndes cross hooks the cleavage and loosens up the red ribbon again as Simpsy drops her eyes trying to prevent her boobs from sprawling out and gets thumped just above it with a vicious right hand that throws her onto the ropes with more shrieks coming from her mouth... she bounces off the ropes and tries to flick a straight jab on the brunette's body but fails to find her range at all and gets clubbed with more cross hooks from the side that just keep her trapped in all kinds of bother, eyes closed, feet stuck without any movement and Lowndes loves to pounce on her prey... she pummels through the arms and rocks the blonde's rack with uppercuts one after another... brutal jug beatdown which slumps Simpson's head forward and unable to even clinch the actress... hup... hup.. hup... the red ribbon is untied by sheer amount of Canadian leather and the blonde is close to tears as Lowndes digs her knee between her legs and sets up more cross hooks from the side trying to punch Simpson's breasts in the open...  she bumps her own jugs against the aching foe and shouts to her ear in another red mist mode threatening moment before a drilling left hand thumps Simpsy's jugs side to side one more time and forces the ref to drag her away at the bell to prevent unnecessary and not exactly legal action.

Round 7:
Simpson's face is covered with her blonde locks as she hugs her aching rack but her entourage has to tie the red ribbon but it's actually torn and barely able to prevent the blonde from effectively fighting topless. There's no time to find a spare and the singer has to respond to the bell otherwise she's done and dusted here... she's up but checks her outfit again and fails to embrace Lowndes leaping after her and finding uppercuts off the bat... thumping series sends the singer's boobs up & down as she gets trapped in the middle of the ring but not for long... Lowndes just drills the blonde's cleavage and pummels her back to the ropes with Simpson losing her footing altogether and soaking up more punishment... Brunette barks in anger and ups the intensity.... clobbers the Texas' finest and it's finally too much for Simpson who leans forward with her loudest scream yet and gets lifted off the canvas with a right hand on the red ribbon that gets torn apart altogether...  OI, SIMPSY!!! Blonde girl slumps to her knees and bumps off Lowndes' rack just as she was going down and rests her head against the ropes before collapsing forward onto all fours... the red ribbon in tatters, not worth more than a shoe-lace now and it's a sobbing & almost completely wrecked blonde getting up at eight only to find her boobs barely covered and exposed to getting punched into the public with the Canadian's every effort... ref notices the malfunction but technically Simpson isn't fighting topless yet so sends her back out even with a misty look in her eyes and jelly knees.... LOWNDES GOES FOR THE KILL... she keeps the singer trapped on the ropes and mugs the rack with more uppercuts, just shatters the already wounded prey and shuts Simpson's eyes into another sobbing display, thumps her breasts in the open much to the audience's delight as there's no ribbon holding the mono-kini in strategic area anymore... Horror beatdown for the blonde who drops her arms and can only soak up as much punishment as she's allowed as the ref has a good look of her boobs rocking side to side and getting bruised & mauled into reddish patches...  Good Golly, Lowndes really wants to punch her off and send them back to Texas... Simpsy realizes she's getting brutalized and whispers... "Stahp... stahh...  " and bursts into spasms as ref finally grabs the brunette's arms and spins her around to center of the ring... "You frickin' wrecked her jugs! She's can't take it anymore!"... Simpson's tears drop on her exposed boobs and only now she understands that she's been out there effectively topless and whispers to herself. "Oh my God... Oh my God..." before getting embraced by the ref and escorted away from the Canadian nemesis... TKO7 Jessica Lowndes!!!

AFTER: Blonde girl slumps on her stool and can't stop sobbing her heart out while desperately trying to tie up the shattered outfit and prevent humiliating material appearing in the next edition of BLONDE! Magazine. Over at the other end Lowndes twerks to the crowd's cheering  before taking over the announcer's mic and shouting to the crowd: "Who stopped Simpsy's jugs?" "YOU DID", the audience plays along in a repeated manner before Jessica has her gloves removed and heads straight over to the wrecked blonde. "I didn't just stop your jugs! I RUINED THEM! Turned them into jelly beans! You damn legend.... you're a JMD legend in your own mind... and now you made my day!", it doesn't take Clint Eastwood to figure out what comes next as a sobbing Simpson stares at the blue ribbon guarding Lowndes' jugs... "Wait you little whore..." 

It's too late for the singer though as the brunette grabs her by the wrist and pulls up from her stool with the blonde's boobs sprawling out again and clattering against Lowndes' forearms... the brunette lets go of the wrist and applies a bearhug to a continuously stunned rival before lifting her up and crashing down on top of her on the canvas... Trish Stratus would be proud of that move but it's agony for Simpson who closes her eyes and can do nothing about Lowndes facesitting her boobs and jumping up & down on them for the next minute or two... "Jelly slut... jelly slut... oh how I love your jelly slut tits..." 

Simpson's spine somehow withstands the mauling but the moans are getting quieter every second as Lowndes finally notices: "Don't you pass out on me just yet, jelly slut!", she slides over at the blonde's tummy and twerks her boobs in front of Simpsy's misty eyes... "Oh my God... you dirty little... ", too late again as Lowndes buries her face underneath the Canada's proudest rack ever since Pamela Anderson went all naturalized citizen... she rubs it back and forth, back and forth until Simpson's legs stop kicking out to indicate the JMD legend has fallen into unconsciousness... Lowndes releases the smother and sits up on the blonde's tummy,  makes sure the white outfit is strategically torn to reveal all of Simpson's jugs to the audience and the embarrassing material is now granted to anyone who wishes to add to the singer's misery. "Take this trash anywhere you want to!", the brunette decides she's done for tonight and gives Simpsy's mounds a couple of slaps trying to find out just how real they are... "Damn jelly beans... sigh...  I just hope Mishy saw what I did to that pudgy whore! She can be the old slapper queen of JMD again but I don't care... I can take her even without the crown on the line! Nobody says I got lucky in punching her sagging boobs into wreckerz and gets away with it! Nobody...  not even a frickin' Hall of Famer!"