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26 September 2014 Gena Lee Nolin vs Catherine Bell

Page history last edited by Archer844 9 years, 6 months ago

Gena Lee Nolin 04.jpg Catherine Bell 12.jpg

Posted by Lookout! Boxing on September 26, 2014, 7:49 pm,

Catherine “Cat” Bell (46 y/o) (Ginny's Academy) vs. Gena Lee Nolin (43 y/o0 (Unmanaged)
(Result: Lookout / Words: simgrrl)

Long Before: “If you look at the record, you'll see that I'm responsible for Cat Bell being in the Hall of Fame. Look up how many times she stepped into a ring to face me, one on one. Go ahead, look it up.” Gena Lee pauses a few seconds, looking around at the media folks tapping keys of intelligent cellphones or smart tablets; one's even looking up something in an old fashioned spiral notebook.

“Anyone?” Another long pause without reaponse. “Oh, c'mon, somebody must have it. How many times...head to head?”

Still nobody responds. Gena Lee sighs and announces dramatically, “The answer folks, is one. O-N-E! And it was long after she'd already banked her precious HOF certificate. By the way, it's just a sheet of paper; not a gold statuette or a mirrored ball trophy. It's just paper, Kitty Cat. Get over yourself!”

“But...um...you lost that fight,” a crusty reporter in a fedora tentatively points out, recoiling under the force GLN's glacial glare.

“Yeah, but it was all meaningless by then anyway,” Nolin huffed. “If we'd fought in her prime, I'da cleaned ol' Kittycat's clock! I fought Naomi Campbell four times....FOUR...back in 1999. Then, Naomi was a terror. You don't think Puddytat coulda found an hour, at least once, back then, to drag her fat behind into a ring to fight me? I sure sent her enough invitations.”

“Good God, even Charlize 'The One' made time for me every now and then - in her prime! She sure doesn't look back on those times as 'the good old days' but she at least showed up and took her whippin' like a woman.

“But Not Fraidy Cat! No, ol' Scardy Cat claimed she was “too busy shooting my awesome TV show” or trying to get preggers or catalog shopping for that fancy bikini top that made those fried eggs look like real breasts for magazine shoots. Now that it's too late, she's suddenly realized nobody wants to see her in the ring unless she's got a hot blonde to kick her butt from pillar to post. Well, Caterwauling Cat, here I am. Come and get your whuppin'.”

Bell, who had never been particularly reticent in the past, this time declined to appear for any of the prefight press events, claiming she was, “working hard to get in shape for what I'm sure will be an entertaining evening for my fans.” Bell's “management” - the woman who vowed to “put Bell on a shelf and never take her down” - also blamed “the press of business” as the reason she was unable to make time to help sell tickets. Ginny, in a mimeographed press release - not even digital, mind you - quoted herself, “This fight doesn't need me to flog tickets. This fight sells itself...Hall of Fame talent; hot MILF fighters - and four of the biggest and best boobs in boxing - except for those clowns running Lookout and Front Street, that is!”

* * * *

Shortly Before: “Introducing your ringside commentators, blonde Playboy cover girl Jenny McCarthy (JM) and her equally blond sidekick...Tractorpull's own gorgeous hottie... Miss Tess Valmore (TV).”

JM: What? You're suddenly a “hottie” and I'm just “a cover girl” that's just wrong on so many levels!

TV: Hey, don't blame me Jennykins. I get paid to show up and endure these ringside chats with you; I don't write the intro. Besides, if I did write them, I'd introduce you as The All-Time Greatest Fighting Playmate.

JM: Really? Aawww, you're sweet, Wal-mart.

TV: Not that I believe it, but what the hey...I don't believe the hype you girls put out any time!

JM: Wait...who said I put out? That's a lie, a crass, downright, falsehood! Not for years have I...

TV: Oh, relax, Jenster. I'm just pulling your chain. Nobody thinks you put out....

JM: Alright. That's better!

TV: ...they all know you're a professional tease. A virgin maybe even.

JM: Wha...them's fightin' words, Barbie Doll! And speaking of words, I read your prediction for this fight. Didn't you say you felt, “...so strongly about GLN” (cheating) that you predicted a Bell victory and you “...hope it comes true.” Pretty gutsy stand for a sniveling yellow journalist, I must say.

TV: I calls 'em as I see's 'em, Chief Dull lKnife. I don't like cheaters; never did; never will. Nolin is a stain on the Hall of Fame and should never have been inducted...and I don't care if it's only a piece of paper, it's supposed to acknowledge somebody who's a credit to the sport. Nolin's no better than Pete Rose in my opinion...maybe worse, because she's demonstrably changed the outcome of contests while Rose was never actually convicted of doing that!

JM: Well, I don't know if....

Just then, they were, thankfully, interrupted by the RING ANNOUNCER:

“And tonight's guest referee - chosen specially for this bout - the Golden Goddess herself, Charlize THERON!

JM: Whoa Nelly! There's a shocker. Doesn't Theron, like, you know, hate Bell for that stunt she pulled in the Wizard's Challenge?

TV: I've no idea what Bell's thinking. Besides, I didn't waste my time watching that schlock, made for PPV, sextravaganza. Oh, and for the record, I accurately predicted Theron would disappointment her fans in that over-hyped fiasco.

JM: News flash Miss Hottie Panties....Theron's disappointed just about everyone in anything she's done since “Monster” which was like a decade ago.

* * * *

Right Before: Charlize Theron comes strutting out of the referee's dressing room and into the spotlight. The crowd roars as she raises her arms to acknowledge their applause, then does a slow pirouette, showing off her 'official uniform' - a black/white striped bandeau top and a tight, black, boy-cut bottom. Unlike when she fights, tonight she's wearing black athletic shoes and there's little 'poofy' white bunny tails at the back from her white athletic socks. As the tall blond catwalks down the aisle to the ring, she slaps palms with many of the fans who are excited to see her in action once more.

After she climbs the steps into the ring, Charlize leans casually in the farthest corner and awaits the introduction of the two women who will do battle.

Bell is introduced first, and she doesn't look at all happy as she steps out into the spotlight, but she does look sensational!

TV: Cat's certainly worked hard to get in shape, she hasn't looked this fit and firm for a fight in years!

JM: I gotta hand it to the old girl, for a brunette who's almost a half century old, she does look fit. But I doubt that body can stand up to the punishment Gena Lee “The Blonde Avenger” Nolin is going to inflict on it!

TV: “Blonde Avenger” where'd you come up with that?

JM: (holding up a sheet of paper). It's right here in the 'talking points' Gena passed out to the media, didn't you get one?

TV: Must have missed that meeting. When was it?

JM: (blushing) I don't actually know what time it was, but it was after midnight last night. I was in the hotel bar. Me and a few of the boys closed the place down and afterward, we went up...”

TV: (covering her ears) La-la-la-la....TMI. I don't really want to hear how you get your 'inside' info.

JM: I'll tell you later... off the air. It's a great story, actually.

TV: Bell's wearing her blue bikini from the old JAG TV show and it still fits perfectly. She really looks like she's taken this 'getting into fighting shape' stuff seriously.

JM: After a couple of kids, she needed to. Girl's been letting herself go lately and it's showed in her results. She's, like, 0-3 in her last 3 fights; hardly 'Hall of Fame' numbers. I don't know why she bothers, I mean, at her age she should be sitting in a rocking chair, clipping coupons and doing her annual 'Good Witch' impersonation.

TV: Those loses were to pretty good fighters but what concerns me is she hasn't been in a ring for almost a year. Nolin's not a fighter you want to face without at least one tune-up. And I'm concerned about whether she's gotten the kind of support she needs to get ready for someone of Nolin's caliber after all the things Ginny said about her and that double cross in the Challenge. Does she even have a sparring partner?

JM: After Bell got in the ring, did you see she went right to her corner; didn't look at Theron, not even acknowledged her presence.

Then Gena Lee Nolin is introduced. Unlike the affection lavished on Theron, or the polite applause for fading star Cat Bell, GLN's greeting is outright hostile. Boos rain down - along with wadded up popcorn bags and a cup still half full of beer! The beer hits the cement at her feet, splashing on Gena Lee's lower legs. She points out a bald guy in the crowd and “demands” security “get him.” Then she tosses her blond hair and continues her strut to the ring, ignoring the chaos erupting in the crowd behind her as security wades in en masse.

JM: Attagirl Gena, don't let 'em get away with that! Jeez, that guy must really be drunk. Do you have any idea how expensive beer is here?

TV: I wouldn't know. They comp our drinks.

JM: WHAT? Comp drinks? How come nobody told me? You shoulda seen my bar tab last night. I swear, if...

TV: Focus Mackie! Gena Lee. Cat Bell. The fight. You got nothing to say about it? No bold prediction? No challenge to Theron? It's been at least a week since you last begged her to fight you.

JM: Blondes rule! What more need I say. Gena's gonna win easy. I doubt Bell'll last two rounds.

TV: I hope not. I'm praying Gena Lee is taking her lightly. Cat does look like she's in good shape, so I'm 'cautiously optimistic'.

Theron calls the two fighters to the center of the ring and repeats the same instructions they've heard hundreds of times in their long careers. Then Charlize runs her hands over both womens bodies as if she's searching them for hidden weapons.

JM: I swear, if that woman ever tries to grope me like that, I'll deck her!

TV: Hee-hee. I'd like to see you try. I thought it was a great precaution, given Gena Lee has been known to throw everything but the kitchen sink in her fights.

JM: Oh wow. That reminds me....I saw a fight in Tijuana once where a woman actually did use a kitchen sink. We were at this apartment wrestling match and....

TV: Not now Jenny. Focus, there's the bell....

* * * *

During R1: Bell comes out of her corner a bit tentatively while Gena Lee charges like she's in a hurry to make her flight home. Nolin whips a huge 'sucker' right hand, but Cat slips the punch and drills GLN in the midsection. Gena's mouth makes that little 'o' thing you see when somebody is hurt, and she backs up behind a couple of defensive left jabs. Cat in cautious pursuit behind a stiff left jab of her own, keeping her right cocked looking for an opening. Nolin peek-a-booing behind her gloves, not giving Bell a target, pawing with a high left. Bell circling left, Nolin right; neither doing much damage through the middle of the round. Nolin up-tempos late, looking to steal points, but clever Cat counters and lands another breathtaking left hook to the body to stop the blond in her tracks.

* *

JM: Good round by Gena, she was clearly the aggressor. Bell's looking winded already, eh Wal-mart?

TV: Cat clearly won the round, Jenny. The only two punches that did anything were both hers. Gena Lee came forward alright, but she kept running into Cat's left hook. No matter who you're rooting for in the fight, the judges had to score the round for Bell 10-9. Not much action as they were both feeling the other out.

JM: Speaking of feeling each other up, did I ever tell you about the time I ran into Theron at a massage parlor and she...

TV: Stop it! I don't need to hear your fantasies about Theron. I think you need professional help.

JM: Oh, yeah. I hired a professional once, just to see what it was like, you know. I have to tell you...

TV: Oh, thank goodness...sorry to interrupt, but here's the bell for the second round...

* *

R2: Again, Nolin beats Bell to the middle of the ring and goes on the attack! Bell circling and retreating in good order under pressure behind a high guard. Nolin throwing bombs but Bell's putting up a sturdy defense and most of the bombs that land do so wide of the target. Bell's left hook counter again finds Nolin ribs and the busty blonde clearly doesn't like that. Nolin adjusting, luring Bell forward, then dropping her right hand over that left hook to the body. Bell shaken by the impact, clinching. Nolin working the ribs, lats and kidneys in the clinches. Theron letting most of it go before finally breaking them apart. Bell's back on the ropes late, Nolin working over those aging abs in tight; Bell again forced to hang on, giving up the body - to Gena Lee's delight. Nolin spins away grinning at the bell, Cat back to her stool breathing a bit harder than the first.

* *

JM: Another big round for the blond. You can't keep a good woman down, Tessarovski.

TV: I have to agree with you this time, Jenny Mac. I didn't see it as big as you, but it was definitely Nolin's round. I've got it 19 all after two. Cat's been scoring to Nolin's body, but Gena Lee's headhunting and that's where she usually wins her fights. I'm surprised we haven't seen more of Theron so far, I'd sort of expected her to be taking charge of these two. After all, she's more or less their contemporary and knows both of their styles as well as anyone.

JM: She's afraid of both of 'em. That's my take. I mean, Bell whupped her behind in the Challenge; and Gena Lee and I have both been barking at her heels for years trying to force her into facing us. Now that I think about it, she hasn't even spent much time on my side of the ring either.

TV: Listen to yourself, woman! Most of the action was at center ring, or on the far ropes. What do you want her to do, come over her for an interview during the fight. Sometimes I don't think you even know what you're saying.

JM: I'm saying the great and powerful 'Golden Goddess' is afraid of me and my microphone. I bet if you offered to give her your chair and referee the fight yourself, she'd run like her hair was on fire. And I've got Nolin breezin' by 20-16, so I don't even know what fight you're watching, Wal-mart!

TV: Arrrrgh. Sometimes you make me so mad I could...and there's the bell for round three!

* *

R3: For the first time in the fight, Bell is on her feet before the bell and is able to stake out her piece of turf at center ring. Bell showing more aggression than earlier and Nolin appears confused; being beaten to the punch consistently in the first minute. Bell establishing the jab, mixing in combinations while GLN continues to throw haymakers - any one of which could end Cat's evening if it lands, but so far none have landed flush. Bell continually being buffeted from one foot to the other by thudding impacts, but Cat's landing two or three solid, if unspectacular, punches to every one of Gena Lee's! Down the stretch, Cat in a rhythm; landing with both hands to the body. Nolin pushed back to the ropes, bounces off and whistles a straight right that glances off of Bell's left ear. Gena Lee's momentum carries her into Bell and as Nolin tries to clinch, Cat rips into her midsection with a left-right-left that momentarily buckles Gena Lee's knees! Nolin hanging on at the bell and this time it's Cat Bell strutting back to her stool, leaving Gena Lee Nolin looking grumpy and out of sorts with her butt stuffed in the ropes!

* *

TV: Now, that looked like the old Cat Bell, the one who used to take Theron apart on a regular basis. It took her a couple of rounds to shake the rust, but that's the best round of boxing we've seen from her in a year. Looks like Nolin's got her work cut out for her from this point. Speaking of points, I'm giving Cat another 10-9 round here.

JM: (grumbling) Gena let her off the hook; stupid blond. Cat's big ol' soft tummy's there for the taking and all Gena Lee can think about is knocking her block off! What's the matter with her manager; her trainer; her towel girl; somebody! Isn't there anybody in Nolin's corner to give her a talking to? Lookit Charlize Theron over there leaning on the ropes an' grinning....probably laughing her fat ass off inside.

TV: I must say, you make some good points, Mac. It's unlike you, but I admit you're one hundred percent on the money for once. Gena Lee's been fighting the wrong fight and Cat's been settling down since the early two rounds. She looked a bit gunshy at first, but she's settled in nicely while Gena's just given her one opening after another...and to her credit, Cat's taking advantage.

JM: I never said Bell couldn't fight, I believe - if we rewind the tape - you'll hear me say something to the effect that Cat Bell could fight really, really, well....but ten years ago. The old girls running on fumes out there, now. Look how they're fanning her with those towels; the corner looks like a Turkish bathhouse.

TV: Hmmm. Could be you're right. She's sucking air right now and there's only a few seconds left before the warning buzzer. Nolin's up and she looks eager to go but Bell's still sitting on her duff.

JM: Duff. Interesting word. Did you know they can trace the origin of the word 'duff', meaning your buttocks or backside, to the early nineteenth century England. For example, you're sitting there on your duff watching a boxing match while I, on the other hand, am entertaining millions of viewers with my witty repartee!

TV: You're boring people, that's what you're doing. Thankfully, the bell just rang and we're back to action....

* *

R4: Nolin comes out up on her toes and it's like she's a totally different fighter this round. She's pumping the jab in Cat's face, circling to her left; forcing Bell to move her feet while Nolin's jab is taking Cat's right hand out of the equation, forcing her to hold it up to protect her. Bell's not looking nearly as smooth and comfortable as before. Gena Lee's showing some nimble footwork - not something she's famous for - and it pays dividends in the middle of round. Bell goes to the left hook again but GLN times it beautifully and drops the right over Cat's shoulder. BELLS SHOOK! Cat rocked by that punch and Gena Lee bellies up to her, jacking Cat backward into the corner. Nolin teeing off on Bell's body in the final minute; Cat just earmuffing, forced to take a body beating she can't afford at her age. Bell trying to fight her way out of the corner, but Nolin's too strong for her; hammering that middle as Cat has to settles her butt down on the turnbuckles. Gena Lee with a big uppercut that's softened by Cat's bra as it takes much of the impact - and even then, Cat's head is pushed backward by the punch. BELL'S HURT! Just at the bell, a big Nolin right hand buckles Cat's legs. Theron jumps in to pull Nolin away as she's winding up for another right with Bell all but defenseless!

* *

JM: S'watt I'm talkin' 'bout, baby! My blond was all over that so-called Hall of Fame brunette. (standing to shout) GO GET 'ER GENA!

TV: SIT DOWN, you're embarrassing me...and yourself. You're supposed to be a neutral observer, slash, commentator. You sound like a high school cheerleader. But you are correct about what a big round it was for Gena. She's starting to gain the upper hand and if Cat doesn't do something to turn this around soon, she's gonna be in for a long, hard, night.

JM: Oh, I disagree. If Bell doesn't turn it around muy pronto, she'll have a very short night. She can't take that kind of pounding at her age...probably hasn't been able to for the past eight or ten years. And Gena Lee hits a lot harder than Theron or Jeri Ryan or Leelee Sobieski or Kim Cattrall or Kate Upton. And you know what those women all have in common? They all beat Cat Bell...except Theron. She hasn't beaten Bell since....ummm....er....

TV: June, 2007.

JM: Huh? What's that?

TV: The last time Theron beat Cat Bell. June of 2007. Only time they fought since then was the night Bell cold cocked her in the Wizard's Challenge. Tenth round, by the way. A late KO, so don't sell Bell short tonight. She packs late thunder.

JM: Miss Smart Panties. Bet your boyfriend watching sent you that date in a text. Or is that something else vibrating in your pocket. C'mon, lemme see it girlfriend. We got no secrets from each other.

TV: I've got plenty of secrets - especially from you! You can't keep your big mouth shut and they put you on TV? What are they thinking....

JM: (laughing) They love my big Playboy jugs, I draw eyeballs. Don't tell me you're jealous too. That's something you and Charlize 'Tiny Titties' Theron have in common, you both would love to have my boobs.

TV: I could have them any time. Just gimme the name of your plastic surgeon and ... what am I saying? I still wouldn't do it! Although I must admit....(Tess leans back and studies Jenny a moment) ... from here they do look spectacular.

JM: Why thank you dear. And I know you're a connoisseur.

TV: Gena's up and she's chompin' at the bit as the warning buzzer goes............

JM: Here, feel 'em; ain't they sumpthin'? Come on...here, feel 'em...Tess? Hey...come back here!

* *

R5: Bell shaking off the effects of what her corner protested was a 'late blow' and comes out determined to turn the ship around. Gena a bit overeager, misses a right hand and eats another left hook to the ribs that makes her grunt in pain. Cat catches Gena backing up with a right to the chest, then follows with another left to the outside of Nolin's right bra cup. Gena's back hits the ropes and she flys back into Bell, accidentally headbutting her in the face. Bell's left eyebrow is bleeding and her corner is on the ring apron screaming “FOUL!” at the top of their lungs. Theron hesitates a moment, then steps in to separate the two, giving both women several valuable seconds to recover while she examines Cat's eye. Satisfied, Charlize waves the two fighters back together. Again, Bell's corner protests, but Charlize waves for them to shut up and ignores their cries. Cat, blinking at the blood running into her left eye, throws a hard right that hits Gena high on the forehead. A Cat left hook glances harmlessly off Gena's right shoulder. Cat's next punch, a sweeping right, never connects. Instead, it's Gena Lee who delivers a hard left somewhere south of the middle of Cat's body. Bell spits out her mouthpiece as she doubles over holding her groin. “LOW BLOW!” Cat's corner howls in unison.

Before Theron can react, or even consider whether or not she should react - because she wasn't in position to really see where Nolin's fist landed - Gena Lee drives a huge right uppercut flush to Cat's chin! Bell's knees unhinge and she drops straight down, landing on her butt with both legs folded under her. She sits there with a glazed look in her face, then slowly tilts backward and sprawls on her back as Nolin stampedes over her, just missing stepping on her head. Charlize manages to corral Nolin and drags her to a neutral corner where she shakes her finger in her face and warns her, “Don't move from here.” Then she goes to Cat and starts to count without checking with the timekeeper at ringside to pick up the correct count.

By the time Theron's count reaches eight, Bell is on one knee and at nine, she just stands up and holds her gloves raised in front of her face. Nolin's corner screams that the count was fifteen but Theron ignores them. After shoving Bell's mouthpiece back in, Theron slaps her hands and waves the fighters to resume. Bell is sluggish and doesn't try to move much. Nolin also doesn't try to be too fancy, just walks up to Cat and starts throwing punches. In the final minute, Cat Bell is battered around the ring and only pushes out enough weak jabs to meet the requirement in Theron's mind, that she's still fighting back. The final twenty seconds of the round see Nolin ignoring the knockout and instead she sets up in front of Bell - who at this point can barely hold her gloves up - and proceeds to shoeshine Cat's proud puppies with scrubbing back and forth punching like she's working over a couple of 38D speedbags! At the bell, Cat wanders teary-eyed to her corner and almost collapses on her stool. Nolin, predator that she is, follows Cat all the way, lurking just over her shoulder and enjoying the sight (and the sound) of her battered prey trying to catch her breath while struggling not giving Nolin the satisfaction of hearing her sobs.

* *

JM: Well, well, well! Welcome back Tess. You almost missed a great show. I guess you changed your mind and came back to check out my “girls” huh? And how about that Gena Lee Nolin! Told you she was gonna flatten Cat like a pancake...or in Cat's case, two pancaked puppies. That's what happens when you punch a blond in the tits, she gets payback every time.

TV: I can't believe Theron. What a nincompoop for a referee. Nolin clocks Cat with an obvious low blow, and she does nothing. Then she screws up the count and gives Cat an extra five or ten seconds to recover. I can't decide if she's crooked, dumb, or both!

JM: She's blond, we know what a burden that can be when you have to think...AND COUNT...at the same time. I can't remember the last time I had to do that. Heck, I can barely balance my checkbook. Well, really I can't, but I have my manager do it for me. We all expected this would happen. They should put Cat out to pasture....or wherever it is they put cats.

TV: (rolling her eyes) I know one blond I'd like to see stuffed in a burlap sack and tossed in the river, but I suppose this network is too wary of protests from PETA if they euthanize my co-host. That was a big round for Nolin. Bell landed a couple of punches in the opening minute, then the wheels came off and it all went downhill from there.

JM: Burlap sacks; rivers; PETA; wheels coming off; and things going downhill. Congratulations Wal-mart, you just won the cliche trifecta! All my years of broadcasting I've never heard anything like that. What's next? Gonna 'lace 'em up' for the sixth round 'shootout'? How about 'do or die' that's a golden oldie that never gets tired.

TV: (ignoring JennyMac) If the commissioner were here, he'd step in and stop this travesty. But I guess he's too busy downloading Kaley Cuoco's nude selfies from the Internet to care if one of his fighters is getting killed in the ring by that cheater Gena Lee!

JM: Now, now, Tess; calm down. I happen to know the commissioner doesn't want, or need, any nude Cuoco pics. He's got an autographed set of my Playboy pictures and we all know I'm ten times hotter than Coo-coo. Besides, there's no way Bell can even come out for the next round. Unless we get hit by a flying towel from her corner, I expect cooler heads will rule and somebody will stop the fight.

TV: Cat's too proud for her own good. I've been saying for years she should have retired but she - and several others - refuse to listen to me.

JM: Maybe they just don't read that rag you work for. I understand Cat's pretty smart....for a brunette.

TV: Oh, she reads it. And so does Theron and so does Ginny. I know because every time I write about one of them, they light up my in box demanding corrections, retractions, issue denials and offer up excuses and explanations.

JM: Well, I guess nobody has any sense, because the girls are getting ready for the sixth round. Here they come....

* *

R6: Cat is up, leaning on the turnbuckles, at the bell. Nolin striding confidently across the ring, her left hand high, glove extended; her right cocked at her cheek. As Nolin walks up to Bell, Cat suddenly springs to life and fires a straight right that hits Gena Lee squarely between the eyes. Nolin's head rocks back and then comes back. She blinks a couple of times, then grins and tees off on Bell who sinks back with her butt in the ropes, soaking up another brutal body attack from the blonde. Gena Lee is finally taking her time, picking her target, then slamming home her fist with deadly accuracy. Cat's butt is being beaten deeper into the ropes and she's leaning forward behind her shaky glove defenses. Gena Lee stops punching, grabs Cat's left glove with her left hand, pulls it down, then slams a right into the side of Cat's face. Theron quickly steps in to push Nolin back, wagging her finger in the blonde's red face and (as some at ringside claimed later) told her, “Tsk-tsk. Gena, you know better than that. Stop it.” Then Charlize bounced backward and shooed Nolin back toward Bell who was leaning back on the ropes shaking her head. Gena Lee, seeing her prey is nearly helpless, tears in and resumes her assault on Bell's plush midsection. Left-right-left-right! Nolin's pistoning gloves bludgeon Bell's belly, doubling the brunette forward into Gena Lee's embrace.

Nolin grabs Cat with her gloves on either side of the brunette's chest, her thumbs pressing down on the middle of Cat's breasts as she stands her upright. As Gena Lee sweeps her hands down, she pulls Cat's top down, exposing her bare breasts. Cat, dimly aware, instinctively grabs her boobs with both hands, leaving her wide open and defenseless when Gena Lee brings her left up right into Cat's crotch! Bell spits out her mouthpiece as she buckles forward into Nolin's waiting arms. Gena holds Cat up with her left forearm under Cat's chin, reaches back and sweeps her right fist across Cat's face, clipping Bell on the left side of the jaw with her elbow on the follow-thru. Cat crumples in a heap at Gena Lee's feet, her head and shoulders supported by the bottom rope; her bare breasts sloshing lazily on her chest as her body bounces up and down.

Theron casually saunters over and looks down at Cat Bell, then turns and gives 'a look' to Nolin, nodding toward the far corner. Gena Lee meets Charlize's eyes and they engage in a staredown for several seconds. Then Nolin steps forward, plants a foot on Cat's chest and steps down, bouncing Cat's body off the ropes into the air. As Cat comes down, the back of her neck hits the rope and her head snaps forward. She slips off the rope to sprawl on her back; her right arm under the rope with her fist dangling off the ring apron. Since Nolin's elbow landed, Cat has been unconscious and Theron doesn't even give Bell the courtesy of a count out, she simply waves her arms, walks over to Nolin and raises her hand in the air. Then she turns and starts to climb through the ropes.

Nolin grabs Theron by the hips and pulls her butt back into the ring, she spins her around and the two exchange words. Finally, Charlize puts both hands on Nolin's chest and shoves her back toward her corner, then Theron swings her leg through the ropes, hops down off the apron and heads up the aisle toward the dressing rooms to a chorus of outraged boos from the same fans who applauded deliriously at her introduction.

Winner by KO6, Gena Lee Nolin.

Bell is slowly brought around and helped from the ring while Nolin primps, preens and postures for the cameras.

* * * *

Immediately After:

JM: Ahem! Told you so, Wal-mart. Blond Power baby!

TV: (cough) Cheater (cough). Low blows 'n' elbows. That Nolin should sell tee-shirts with her slogan on 'em. She can't cheat, she can't win. Every fight she has won she's gotten the advantage by cheating. It makes my blood boil!

JM: (chuckling) I see what they mean when they call you “a hot blooded blond bimbo.”

TV: (interrupting) I'M NOT A BIMBO! You're the bimbo, McCarthy. You say that one more time and I'm coming across this table and we're gonna have more than words. And I won't have to cheat to beat you, you....you....bimbo! (Tess angrily throws down her headset and storms out!)

JM: Well, that was good entertainment. But now that I have the airwaves all to myself, I'd like to say a few words about the quality - or lack thereof - of the refereeing in tonight's main event. Clearly, Theron is unqualified to referee a soccer match, let alone a boxing match. She let both fighters get away with all kinds of things in there; she lost count....hey, Theron, it's one, two, three, etc., one to ten; how hard can it be. You're making all us blondes look bad, honey! And I want this on the record, if you're really afraid to fight Nolin, I've got an open challenge to you on the table. How about next St. Patrick's Day?

Anyway, they're giving me the 'wrap-up' sign, I guess the winner is holding her press conference. So let's go to the press center....

* * * *

Postfight: Cat Bell is unable (or unwilling) to appear before the media, but Gena Lee doesn't appear to mind doing all the talking, something she does for a good twenty minutes. She ignores questions she doesn't want to answer (like the KO elbow and the low blows) and other questions she sounds like she's going to answer, but then veers off on a tangent having nothing to do with the question posed by the reporter.

One thing is clear, whatever they said to one another in the ring - and Nolin refuses to divulge what was said - Gena Lee has NOT given up her crusade to force Charlize Theron into the ring to fight her again! The subject works its way into almost every answer she gives and she even manages to remind anyone who has forgotten that she and Theron have met in other contests.

“Hey, just six weeks ago, I submitted the b###h in an apartment 'rasslin' match. Why's she so afraid to face me? I mean, I'll be wearing big, ol', soft, padded, gloves. How much damage could I do?”

The TMZ reporter asks Nolin how she beat Theron and GLN replies, “How did I submit her? Breast Claw, of course. What better hold is there for less well endowed girls like Theron, Loken and Keibler...you know, anybody with less than a handful - if you get my meaning.”

After the laughter subsides, a brunette reporter meekly raises her hand to ask, “Is it true, as many so-called experts - I'm quoting Tess Valmore's column, that many brunette's are actually better fighters than blondes, and it's only by using subterfuge or dirty tricks that blondes such as yourself win?”

Nolin glared at her for a moment, then walked over, grabbed the reporter by the hair and dragged her out the door.

“Sorry folks,” the moderator said. “That concludes the evening's entertainment.”