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31 January 2015 Pink vs Rose Byrne

Page history last edited by Vassago 9 years, 2 months ago

FOXY BOXERS AT THE ASYLUM

Posted by The Grand Wizard on January 31, 2015, 9:42 pm

BEFORE:

"It's always great to get an FCBA fight," says Rose with a smile. "Glad to get a chance to come here to Philly. And I don't plan to waste it."

"Don't let her record fool you," Pink says with a nod. "She's an Aussie. She can fight. She can't fight like PINKNESS, mind, but there's a lot of that going around."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Back at ringside, and that's 'Paranoid Android' you hear and that can only mean one of the world's biggest Radiohead fans, the lovely Rose Byrne of Foxfire Atlantic, is on her way to the ring!"

McCarthy: "And, as I've said, like, a trillion times before, TYPICAL Dancing Hooker opponent. NO FCBA wins..."

Cassie: "Byrne hasn't exactly had many opportunities on this side of the pond, to be fair..."

McCarthy: "Which proves my point. If she were any good, she'd get fights..."

Tess: "Now, we BOTH know that's not true, Mac..."

McCarthy: "No, only one of us knows it, and it's not ME. I don't know ANYTHING..."

Cassie: "And we ALL know THAT..."

McCarthy: "Let me FINISH, YOU LITTLE..."

O'Dell(sighing): "Byrne into the ring and helped off with the robe by the Foxfire Atlantic corner to reveal a red number that highlights the excellent shape she's in for this one, and that's 'Trouble' you hear, and here comes 'The Queen of Front Street', Pink!"

McCarthy: "I'm surprised she doesn't DUCK when she comes by the table, since she's been ducking ME for years!"

O'Dell: "Pink wasting no time getting into the ring. She's helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that black number with the white skulls she usually wears, and it's time for some picks. Tess favors Pink. Mac?"

McCarthy: "Pink's overrated, of course, not fit to carry my sports bra, but she's favored over THIS tomato can."

O'Dell: "Cassie?"

Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"

O'Dell: "Let's find out if our ladies are right. There's the bell. Pink across the ring immediately and right at Rose, and Byrne not shying away at all. The Aussie a good sized bantam, 5'6" plus and a full 120 at the weigh in. She's going to be more than willing to mix it up."

Cassie: "Pink the more athletic of the two, so I suspect we'll see some movement from her at some point, but, as we've often said before, she's very well balanced and can do a lot of different things in there."

O'Dell: "Right now, she's showing the head and hand movement, both girls moving the feet trying to square up. Pink getting the better of the exchanges, as she's getting off first most of the time. Byrne holding her own, however, not backing up and not backing down."

Tess: "Both fighters getting into a rhythm early. Getting punches put together."

O'Dell: "No doubt about it, and they're landing good percentages despite some nice defensive stuff on both sides. Again, both fighters moving heads and hands well, not allowing for easy targeting. Coming down the stretch in an action-packed first and nothing slowing down. Good flurry there and Pink landed a solid left. One more exchange and there's the bell. A stare and a smile exchanged and then the fighters turn back to the corner. Good first goes to Pink."

McCarthy: "And she has the 10-9 lead."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second begins with more aggression from both girls. They just meet right in the center of the ring and have at it. Again, nothing sloppy about it. Both fighters setting their punches up, both showing good movement and defense, but neither of them hard to find..."

Cassie: "Got to wonder if Pink's going to continue with this straight-ahead strategy. She usually likes to do some moving. But not tonight, at least not so far."

O'Dell: "What she's doing is working, no question. She's getting plenty of leather on target, but Byrne holding her own again, giving as good as she gets in these exchanges."

McCarthy: "Byrne keeping the hands a little higher this round, and it's making a difference. She's picking off more of Pink's offense."

O'Dell: "She is, indeed, and it's making things more even in these exchanges. Pink used the speed and the head movement to get the better of them in the first, but Rose counteracting that now, and able to land with the singer punch for punch. The Aussie getting into rhythm as we go down to the final seconds, and there's the bell. Good, two-way second, but Rose gets it."

Tess: "And ties it at 19."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Third begins with some of that movement from Pink. Doing a jab-and-circle thing, dancing, punching off the back foot, making Byrne chase..."

Tess: "Why the change in strategy, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Who knows why the Chief Dancing Hooker does anything?"

Cassie: "Could be a couple of reasons behind it, Tess. Byrne hasn't had a lot of FCBA fights, so you don't have a ton of video on her, so you might want to see how she reacts to things. Also, you might want to make her adjust again, after she did so effectively in the last round."

O'Dell: "Byrne patient, stalking, creating exchanges. Pink not ducking out of there when that happens. She punches with, then, when they peter out, she's back to bouncing..."

McCarthy: "She's not DOING much when she's bouncing around out there, though. Just snapping a jab. Scabbo might be right. Might be a little of a feeling out process."

O'Dell: "Whatever it is, Pink remaining committed to it as we head down the stretch. Byrne continuing to try to create action. Working carefully. Nothing sloppy. Knows how risky that would be. Final seconds tick off and there's the round. Byrne gets her second straight."

Tess: "And leads 29-28."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "Fourth begins with more dancing from Pink who then bounces forward and LIGHTS BYRNE UP with a combination! Rose not hurt but consider her attention GOTTEN."

Cassie: "That'll slow the pursuit down..."

O'Dell: "And ANOTHER good flurry from Pink! Stops Byrne and makes her cover up! Rose back to the forward motion as Pink's getting her DANCE on now. The singer showing TONS of fluid movement, everywhere and nowhere, darting in to touch Byrne up and then back out again..."

Tess: "She looks like a flyweight..."

Cassie: "A BIG fly with a BIG punch..."

O'Dell: "Rose adjusting again now. Moving the feet more to try to stay square. Keeping the hands high to be ready for Pink's flurries. Byrne still getting hit when Pink bounces in, but she's able to counter some now, score in spots. Coming down to the final seconds, and Pinkness going to dance the round away. She's booked her best round of the fight here in the fourth."

McCarthy: "38-38 with six to go."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Pink right back to bouncin' and misbehavin' as we start the fifth. Byrne cautiously forward, hands high, working the feet, mindful of her opponent's quick-strike capability. Pink doing a lot of feinting now, looking to create openings..."

McCarthy: "Byrne's adjusted nicely. She's not getting caught unaware by Pink's quick salvos and she's holding her own with the counters."

O'Dell: "She is that. Rose may be on the defensive, but she's scoring on those terms. Pink a quick combination. Byrne a good counter and DOWN GOES ROSE!"

Cassie: "Left hook! Pink's a natural lefty. That left hook is DEADLY..."

O'Dell: "And Byrne sent crumpling to hands and knees! Pink to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Rose to her feet at eight. Referee gives her the mandatory and will waive Pink forward and ON SHE COMES! Pinkness all about the finish now and she ROCKS Rose with a right hand! Byrne wobbled, backed to the ropes and STAGGERED AGAIN WITH A LEFT HOOK! Byrne in deep trouble. RIGHT HAND PINK sends her spilling along the ropes and ITS OVER! Referee has seen enough and he's stopping it! And your winner by TKO5 is 'The Queen of Front Street', Pink!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I have our winner, Pink, and, Pinkness, you wasted no time getting her out of there once you got her hurt..."

Pink: "In this federation, when you get an opportunity to finish, you have to DO it. This girl hasn't fought much, but she CAN fight. She's smart, athletic, and can hit. You don't want to let her hang around."

Tess: "I know the answer, but I'm going to ask. What's next for you?"

Pink: "This year is about a title shot. Whatever management thinks I need to do to get there is what's next."